are you 38 weeks and counting?

[badmamma]

Junior magazine ? Britain's finest parenting magazine ? is looking for a witty, observant pregant woman in final weeks of her FIRST pregnancy to keep a diary until she gives birth. It should be full of the magic, awe and wonder of a first baby, but also have the comical observations about being big and hot and about to burst. It will be published in September/October and there will be a fee. Please email [email protected]
if you wish to take part. You don't need to be a journalist, just have a good sense of humour.
CUT OFF DATE FOR APPLICATIONS July 23rd.

Badmamma, come on, you were advertising Junior (the 'finest' bit comes from your strapline). Sorry if everyone made you feel left out. I personally can't stand Junior magazine so never miss a chance to criticise it - sorry.

And I can't imagine that my experiences of pregnancy would sit well in Junior - they weren't glamorous or witty in any way - definitely more Mother and Baby, dull and slightly grim.

Well, I'm appalled at the reaction to Badmamma's post. She's set up a thread specifically for her request, not hijacked another one. If you don't like the thread, don't read it!

I used to think the people here were friendly. Even on the very heated Religion thread "you" were never as rude as this.

The bit about "Britain's finest parenting magazine" is, I believe, the magazine's tag line not a personal opinon.

I like Junior magazine and have actually taken out a subcription to it. Call me what you like, but I find it is a magazine that sees you as an intelligent human being, not just a brainless scatty mother.

I enjoy the articles and my kids are 15 and 16. but Nanny for a 2 and 4 yr old plus doing a degree in Childhood and early years education, so it is useful to keep in touch with current trends and issues.

I find all the others - Mother and Baby, Parents etc all the same and a load of rubbish and poor value for money.

Well I've only just looked at this thread since I'm not 38 weeks and counting but blimey!

It seems to me that badmamma was only asking (once, not 10 times like that irritating TV Claudia woman) if anyone was interested in writing about their experience and earning some money. OK she used Juniors' description of itself (one with which I'd disagree, incidentally) but she wasn't actually saying "BUY THIS NOW, ITS GREAT" in an overtly advertising way (a la a colic remedy manufacturer elsewhere here) so I can't see the problem.

Badmamma, I am a writer but I'm not pregnant so I can't help. But I agree, please keep posting if you like it here. But I'm afraid I hate Junior too, sorry.

I'm completely new to this website and I must admit that I'm shocked by the reaction from some people (are you regulars as you seem to be an authority on the mumsnet site)

For goodness sake she was only asking a question, it's really not the Spanish Inquisition is it?

If I was pregnant for the first time (which I'm not) I would love to help you badmamma. Hope you find someone soon, good luck.

(keeping head down to avoid flak) badmamma, I think this is possibly not the best board to find a first-timer on anyway - there are other MBs aimed more specifically at first-timers, aren't there? (Couldn't give you addresses but maybe someone else could.)

Hi, badmamma. Hope that you didn't find my post hostile - it might be better if I learned how to make those little smiley faces. I was sending myself up, having just rediscovered humour (albeit a very poor variety), just as much as the concept of a "witty" pregnancy (I wish).

I am a relative newcomer to mumsnet. The first message that I posted was when I was feeling depressed about being unable to breastfeed after my baby was in intensive care. Within 24 hrs I had over 25 messages of support. The warmth, sympathy and understanding that was in those messages helped me through what was a very difficult time. Since then I have posted regularly on mumsnet, including some very heated discussions on religion, but have always felt welcome and that our differences have been tolerated. I also know from experience that someone that you disagree with today will help you out tomorrow. I was bullied at school and I know what it feels like to be excluded from the in-crowd, and that definitely isn't the case with mumsnet. I really feel like I have made cyber-friends here.

To all you who responded so aggressively towards badmamma, perhaps you might want to think about the very real possibility that she or another journalist receiving a similar 'reception' could well use her experience in a piece giving Mumsnet some very bad publicity, for example in comparing parenting sites on various points.

This could do Mumsnet a lot of damage, so please think before letting rip at someone.

badmamma, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so cutting with my posting. My comment about Claudia not being made welcome was a reference more to the way that she was treated than how you should be treated. In her case we had a great long thread about how tv programmes tend to make their volunteers look really stupid.

I really think that most first time mums will be more worried about what will happen to them than being able to write a witty diary. Past the event we can all look back and think about funny things that have happened to us (like incontinence, wondering who the staff were talking about when they kept saying my husband's Sunday name, and the mad dash across to the temporary delivery suite at the other side of the hospital when I started bleeding due to placenta previa - 3 midwives all panicking and other women on the labour ward screaming with every contraction because they needed to go too). I can laugh now, but I'm sure that reading it would frighten some first timers half to death!

I just wish that I was capable of writing something that could earn money for me. Sorry for any offence caused.

Badmamma, I have been thinking about my reply to your post all day and feel I owe you an apology: it was a bit of a case of a truly horrible evening with my kids, who winged, wined and refused to go to sleep, a useless husband who sat watching t.v. throughout whilst making useless comments like" the baby's a bit unsettled tonight", and 3 glasses of wine in quick sucession. I felt neither witty nor humorous and took my temper out on what I thought was a thinly disguised sales pitch. I apologise and would like to echo the sentiments of ionesmum, that this site really is not full of little cliques. I am new myself and yes, people frequently disagree or hold opposing views, but are generally supportive and helpful.

However, can I try to explain why, IMO, parenting magazines of any sort do nothing for me, and I have never read Junior, so I am not singling this particular one out for criticism, but I find that they are all aimed at trying to get parents to buy into a lifestyle. It may be the advertising which puts me off, even though I guess financially, it is necessary, or it may be the fact that it does not seem to be enough to love your child and do the best by it: also one needs to have the latest pram, the trendiest baby clothes etc. etc. I bought lots of these kind of mags when I was expecting my first child, and TBH, didn't find that they helped me a great deal when it came to having my baby, or afterwards. I simply found I spent a fortune on things I didn't really need and ended up with expectations of myself as a mother which I found impossible to meet. Before I offend anyone further, can I just say that this is purely my experience and that I found an informative pregnancy book, which did not also have to satisfy the needs of its advertisers as well as its readers, more informative and helpful.

Anyway, excuse the waffle and sorry again Badmamma. Good luck with your search and welcome to Mumsnet from one (not so stroppy this evening)newcomer to another!

OK a few points. janh - you suggested there are better msg boards to find first time pregnant women. oh stupid me to think they might read a msg board called Pregnancy. PamT in your opinion women have better things to do than write about their pregancy and it wouldn t be funny because pregnancy is grim. well, i wasn t asking for Mrs Bean Gets Up The Duff, just a diary written in the way we all talk to each other both in the real world and on places like this website.

part of the idea of this exercise was to break down idea that magazines are a glossy edifice that excludes ordinary experience

i thought women of Mumsnet would rise to the challenge and i d be inundated by women with lots to say- i d heard talk this was a sassy place to hang out. i m quite alarmed by all your lack of self esteem, in the sense you think 'oh no one would be interested in my life' or 'i couldn t do it, i m no good.' etc.

i thought you were supposed to empower each other here. not pour cold water on every opportunity.

badmamma, calm down.
The board is called mumsnet. The members, generally, are already mums (except for the occasional dad).
This topic is called pregnancy. People who post on here will not generally be on their 1st pregnancy.
Does it make sense now?

I feel a bit guilty now. But I didn't mean to have a go at you badmamma, just Junior.

And some women don't find pregnancy particularly fun and empowering, thats life. Can't dress everything up in a jolly, positive way I'm afraid. I could write reams on all the brilliant, empowering things I've done in my life, but sitting on the sofa for a month, eating chocolate alternating with sips of Gaviscon, with terrible hip pain and feeling like a 100 year old whale wasn't one of them.

Wow, you spend an evening watching Albert Finney impersonate Winston Churchill, then several sunkissed hours dragging yourself round Bromley shopping for the 45 other toddlers you know who turn 3 before the end of July, and you come back and find this.
Badmamma, I subscribe to Junior even though aspects of it drive me completely bonkers (the rampant materialism, the lack of attention given in the London section to the humdrum parts of London that most of us have to live in, the mad fashion spreads and the costly holiday suggestions). I guess it's not that surprising that people feel it doesn't reflect our lives...but then, no magazine reflects my life these days...and heaven knows I buy enough. Recent articles on stillbirth and Fragile X syndrome were really moving and memorable, and streets ahead on anything like them in the press or the other parenting mags.
Persuade the commissioning editor that what you need is a diary of a SECOND-time round mum and you might find you have a queue of interested applicants!

I've never heard of Junior (sorry - I do live in the back of beyond and don't drive, so that's probably why), but while on the subject of parenting mags, what would people generally recommend, if I ever find myself in a metropolis with access to a large newsagent? Are there any reviews of them here (I've looked but couldn't find any, but am dim at searching).

A bit off-topic, I know, but reading through some of the bits on this thread, I wondered if there was anywhere here where new members could introduce themselves, or something. This sort of thing maybe isn't in the ethos of the site, so apologies if the suggestion is way out of line (nothing worse than someone new popping up with silly suggestions, I suspect). Just that although I'm used to online discussion forums, and have never been worried about posting anywhere (you probably guessed that) I know that when I was new to them it took me ages to pluck up the courage to post, and having a small section where I could do so to start off with really helped. It's also really nice to know who established members are - specially somewhere like here, where it's clear that a lot of people work professionally with children/ have quite large families so know all the ropes back to front etc.

I don't really want to get into the great debate about diaries, etc, but for the record, I found badmamma's post interesting (certainly it interested me in the magazine). I wish I was big and hot - how about a small, skinny woman who looks like she's got a football stuck up her sarong? Oh, and with a toddler in tow (although I could always pretend she isn't mine - do that in shops all the time.

Good grief, WW3 had broken out on Mumsnet!

Seriously, though, maybe we need to step back a moment and take stock. I don't think this is anything to do with cliques, low self-esteem or lifestyles. I suspect there's been a bit of a reaction to Badmamma's post because, rightly or wrongly, many people are suspicous of journalists and the press these days.

Maybe a bit more research and thought wrt to the message would have produced a more positive result - I'm still not sure whether Badmamma is here as a parent or as a journo!

Marina, I really agree with your assesment of Junior. The articles are terrific but much of the lifestyle stuff is beyond my wildest dreams and the fashion is just scarey.

Also agree with your posting, Suedonim.

Badmamma, I've seen from your post on smacking children that you've been misinterpreted yourself. It's very easy to be misunderstood in print; things make much more sense if you can see someone face-to-face. I assume that when you were talking about low self-esteem you didn't mean my depression after dd was born -in circumstances which would not have made a witty end to any diary, I'm afraid. I really hope that you don't leave mumsnet, it's great and it'd be terribly dull if we all kept on agreeing with each other!

By the way, I find the soft drink pop-up far more annoying!

FrancesJ, I've never heard of Junior either, I think badmamma has got a bit defensive (understandably)....I was trying to help!

I wasn't going to post on this because I feel that I may have been missunderstood or the WW3 might have continued but JUST to clear the air....
I was NOT attacking Badmamma - I have read her posts on other threads and have not had an issue with them
I do not think I or others are cliquey ! We are (or I am at least) always trying to help new nicknames/comers.
At the risk of repeating myself or others, Mumsnet has been used in the past for advertsing purposes and it gets very tiring as we are there to have "friendly" chats.

Badmamma - there is no war !

except with the soft drink popup

Am I being thick? Granted I don't read all the pregnancy threads, but amongst those messages mumsnetters have posted, aren't there many examples of 'the magic, awe and wonder of a first baby, but also ..... comical observations about being big and hot and about to burst'...

badmamma is giving someone the opportunity to get paid for writing similar observations. Take it or leave it. Don't like the plug for Junior magazine, but like the fact that the orignal message is upfront.

Personally, I'd be more likely to take offence if badmamma had posed as an ordinary parent, started a discussion and then revealed her intention.

wow, this has been a very exciting weekend. in the words of Mrs Merton i enjoyed a heated debate. i take it all back about mumsnet you are sassy women out there. and after feeling initially cliqued out, i ve now rather warmed to the directness of some correspondents. luv a good row. to answer whether i m here as a journalist or a mum, the answer is both. i have two sons, 6 and 4. but i also occasionally write for and commission for Junior. i now realise none of you are probably 1st time pregnant ladies. but if any of you know anyone who might like to do it... otherwise i ll try ringing up an NCT group or stalking maternity bra section of John Lewis.

Also if you have suggestions for topics never covered in preg & parenting mags which you feel shd be i d love views which i will pass on.