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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

At what age did you potty train your DC's?

32 replies

insertwittynicknameHERE · 11/02/2009 16:02

Because DH thinks DD is ready, I am not sure, but she is only coming up to 15mo and I think it is a bit too young to start TBH.

Please share your views and experiences.

TIA

OP posts:
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bogie · 11/02/2009 16:05

Ds was fully trained by 20 months I was fully trained at 18 months.
My friend started training her dd at 12 months.
Does your dd have a dry nappy after naps if she does she has some bladder control, and if she understands you well when you speak and she can communicate well with you she might be ready.
I think you just know when they are ready try and if she has no intrest give it a go in a couple of months.

thisisyesterday · 11/02/2009 16:07

when he was ready! he was just over 2, and instigated it himself, telling me when he needed a wee. wasn't planning on doing it for a while, but as I say, he instigated it.

if a child is ready there really shouldn't be the need for too much actual "training" they should be able to be dry in a few days,

sweetkitty · 11/02/2009 16:10

I think I was about 31 when we started training DD1 (sorry couldn't resist it)

DD1 was just under 2 and what a nightmare, she has a weak bladder and simply couldn't hold it but didn't want to wear nappies anymore.

DD2 was 2 1/2 and did it in a week, I left her later as I was pregnancy and had SPD and couldn't face it.

Personally I would wait until 2 and save yourself the hassle until she is truly ready. Potty training is hard work and can be stressful for both child and parent, those first few long trips out minus a nappy are hairy.

Seona1973 · 11/02/2009 16:10

dd was nearly 2 1/2 and ds(2.4 years) was just under 2 when he gave signs that he was ready so we started gently. By the time he was 2 he was into his pants and just wears nappy at nap/bedtime (he is still in a cot so I think it is unfair to take him out of nappies but not be able to let him get to the toilet if he needs it)

Clayhead · 11/02/2009 16:11

Both as they turned 2, ds and dd.

BonsoirAnna · 11/02/2009 16:13

15 months is far too young. It will be so much trouble...

As others say, once they are ready it is easy.

Hulababy · 11/02/2009 16:14

DD was 24 months. She decided one day she wanted big girl pants and no nappy, so we followed suit. 3 days later she was dry

DD could possibly have started earlier but I just didn't have the inclination to push it and test the waters so to speak. It was really easy letting her lead us and I had very little to do about it all, and DD made all the decisions.

NorktasticNinja · 11/02/2009 16:14

DD is just coming up to 15 months too, I;ve been letting her use the potty (just for fun) since she was about 10 months. She loves it and has provided regular wees and occasional poos right from the start.

Yesterday morning she asked for the potty herself and did a nice big poo We're not potty training as such, but I offer DD the potty at each nappy change and generally leave one hanging around. She likes to use it as a little chair and to toilet her toys. Given nappy free time she will often (but certainly not always) go to the potty to wee.

A lot of children start realising and saying they have wet / dirtied their nappies at around this age and IMHO there is a real danger of Nappy Training them at this age IYSWIM. I think letting them use the potty and increasing their awareness of toileting in general is definitely a good thing, as long as it's fun and stress free.

insertwittynicknameHERE · 11/02/2009 16:19

No DD doesn't have a dry nappy after naps or anything, TBH the opposite is true, she pees for England bless her.

I do think she is too you, she can communicate with us but only basicallly, for example she will tell us if she wants something to eat or drink. She will say muma and dada and call the grandparents. But she doesn't say if she needs the toilet.

DH reckons that because she ocasionally squats to poo that she is ready Makes me laugh as it will be me doing the hard work.

I am pg now and am due in July, I was planning on waiting for a few months after that. DD will be 20mo when baby is due so I was planning on starting at 2 unless she had already instigated it.

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insertwittynicknameHERE · 11/02/2009 16:24

Hulababy, I would like to do that, let DD lead us so to speak, I really do not have the inclination to start the actual potty training with her yet.
NorktasticNinga,that sounds like a good way of soing things. I would like DD to be able to realize when she feels ready. I suppose it cant hurt to leave a potty on the room, and let her get used to it. I will probably do that TBH and just let DD get on with it.

Thank you everyone.

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Highlander · 11/02/2009 16:29

3.5

Saw lots of mums with girls apparently potty trained, but had huge accidents all the time. They'd all improved dramatically by 3.5.

There's no rush.

The Gina Ford book is surprisingly practical and hugely empathic. Written very much from the toddler's POV.

imaginewittynamehere · 11/02/2009 16:30

dd was 21 months , often had dry nappies& was was trained in just over a week.

If DH is keen get him to try her without a nappy for a weekend & see if he still thinks she is ready...

As a compromise maybe start to inroduce potty time in conjunction with nappies.

NorktasticNinja · 11/02/2009 16:32

If she's squatting to poo (thus showing a clear awareness of what she's doing) why not offer her the potty? It doesn't mean you have to make the transition to being nappy free now, or next week or even next year if you don't want to. If she learns it's fun to be allowed to use the potty 'like a big girl' surely that can only make potty training easier for all when you decide to take that step?

I really and genuinely don't get the prevailing All Or Nothing attitude to potty training at all. Is it just that people think it's too much work / fuss / hassle to allow babies to use a potty just for fun? DD loves to know that I wee and poo too and I'm sure it's no coincidence that she ordered the potty for her first truly independent poo the morning after finding out that papa poos too.

There are so so many threads on here about children fighting potty training and being afraid of the potty/toilet at later ages...

NorktasticNinja · 11/02/2009 16:33

Sorry, DD distracted me and I forgot to refresh before I ranted posted...

Lotster · 11/02/2009 16:48

Just a thought as you've had lots of comments already, but as she is so little, why not wait until the weather is warmer in a couple of months, that way she can run around with fewer clothes on to be changed/washed every time there's an accident, and it'll be more comfortable for her/easier for you?

My HV said they need to have the muscle control to hold it, be able to explain they're going to do a wee or poo, and have the dexterity to deal with the clothing.

insertwittynicknameHERE · 11/02/2009 16:53

Thanks everyone.

I think I will just keep a potty in the room and let DD have a sit on it at every nappy change/nappy off time.

But not actually do any potty training as such. I do feel she is too early to tell me she needs a pee or a poo. Hopefully if she manages to do one in the potty anyway it will be a good sign.

Good idea about starting in the warmer weather, plus our washing machine is broken (again) so don't like the thought of dragging all that washing to the launderette.

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NorktasticNinja · 11/02/2009 16:57

'Meh' at Lotsters HV. EC'd babies have bladder and bowl control long before they can speak or deal with clothing. EC is a bridge too far for me and most other parents too, but we wouldn't dream of waiting with weaning until DC can explain what they fancy to eat and handle a knife and fork with skill!

NorktasticNinja · 11/02/2009 16:58

x again witty! Sounds like a good plan

ches · 12/02/2009 04:33

IME there is a bit of a "window of opportunity" with early potty training, as long as you have realistic expectations (a "nappies saved" outlook) and keep is laid-back so as not to create a potty phobia. Around 2, earlier for some, later for others, they go through a developmental phase as part of the development of understanding of "self" (the "mine" phase is part of this) where they are fiercely independent and will fight you tooth and nail even if it's something they want to do. This is why starting out potty training around 2 can be a nightmare. However, if you start out around 15 months, when they've just started processing sequences and following instructions, and as they become wee/poo aware, they learn that the potty/toilet is the place for wee/poo and will surprisingly quickly prefer to use it. DS stopped pooing in nappies at 15 months and started asking to wee (not every time of course) before he had a first word. "Wee" was one of his first words because using the toilet was that important to him. This from a child who NEVER showed discomfort in wet or soiled nappies.

insertwittynicknameHERE · 12/02/2009 09:21

Thanks ches, some good points there.
DD hates being in a soild nappy and we have to get it changed as soon as poss. My mum said I was the same and I was dry and clean in the day by 18mo (apparently). I think ATM I am going to stick to just having the potty around and maybe even sitting her on the toilet (my great aunt bought us one of those child toilet seats).

Last night every time we changed her nappy she sat on the potty at no instigation from either DH or myself, so I am taking that as a positive sign. We gave her some nappy off time and although she did wee on the floor, she went to her potty afterwords so maybe she does understand what the potty is for. Or maybe I am being a bit too optimistic lol.

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Maveta · 13/02/2009 19:53

you´ve had great advice on here and sounds like you´ve had a good start introducing the potty. I am all in favour of making it part of their routine from a young age so it´s not a big deal/potential battleground/source of fear or phobia later on.

Ds has reliably pooed in the toilet since 10mo. Since introducing a sign for ´toilet´ at about 18mo (could have done this earlier but it didn´t occur to me! he was already signing other things) has very regularly asked to go to the toilet. I briefed the nursery about a month ago (he was 20mo) and he now asks for the toilet there too. He often has dry nappies and when nappy free can go without a pee for up to 1.5hours. Tried him without a nappy all day today to see what happened. 1 accident (though a big one!) but not bad. Still not sure about losing the nappies for good though. I think at this age it´s important that they don´t feel any stress about it and the second he seems to feel pressured I´ll probably whap the nappies back on.

just point out to your dh that it´s not necessarily an easier life having a toilet trained child. for poo absolutely it is - not dealing with pooey nappies is a godsend. But for wee it is actually a lot easier to change a wet nappy every few hours but otherwise not even really think about your child´s toilet needs. When ds is nappy free he often tells me but there´s a certain degree of awareness required from me too - remember to ask him if he needs to go, making sure he at least tries to go before we leave somewhere/when we arrive somewhere, making sure you have a portable potty on you or know where the nearest loo is etc etc. Obviously you must get used to this and adapt and they presumably get better at waiting longer/telling you but this may not be the case at your dd´s age.

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 13/02/2009 19:56

thisisyesterday - are you me?!

That's exactly how it happened with our ds1. Think it had something to do with a couple of his friends at nursery doing it at the same time.

A year later and he's still not dry at night though

Babieseverywhere · 13/02/2009 21:46

I didn't potty train DD, I ECed her. i.e. Introduced a potty when she was a baby. She was clean and dry from 12 months old (with the exception of a five month regression for wees on the arrival of her baby brother)

I am doing the same with baby DS and I really hope he will be clean from a similar young age, I like not dealing with pooey nappies.

15 months is not too young if you want to introduce a potty, it doesn't matter if DD uses it or not, just nice for a child to have an option to use it, especially if she dislikes pooing in nappies.

insertwittynicknameHERE · 16/02/2009 08:07

Thank you everyone, what does ECed mean [stoooopid emoticon]. DD is doing really well ATM, no wees or poos in the potty yet but I let her sit on the 'big girl' toilet and she did the tiniest of wee's. Que lots of praise from me lol.

She sits on the potty, on her own accord (ie I don't sit her on it), at most nappy changes now and claps her hands to show what a big girl she is being.

We have decided to just take it easy and let her be around the potty and on the toilet and praise her lots when she sit son them and if she does anything.

Maveta, what do you mean about signs? [sorry, another stoooopid emoticon] whatever they are they sound like a good idea. Is it where you print a sign for the potty and toilet and the DC point to to when they want it????

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Babieseverywhere · 16/02/2009 08:15

EC means ELimination Communication. Which is offering the use of a potty to a young baby.

Introducing a sign usually refers to a british sign language or makaton hand sign. i.e. The child does a hand movement which the parents know means toilet/potty and put the child on the potty in response to that.

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