Gave up potty training but now DD weeing on floor!

[Maternityleavelady]

Did 4 days of potty training with DD but got hardly any wees in potty (0 on day 1, 2 on day 2, 1 on day 3 and 1 on day 4) and many were on the floor, so figured she wasn’t ready and put her back into nappies today.

But now she is pulling down her nappy and trousers and weeing on the floor! Have we confused her? Should we continue trying to train her and get her to wee on the potty?! She goes back to nursery on Tuesday (so 3 days left now)

I'd start again. Each time she pulls down her nappy, sit her in the potty and give her a book to look at. There are plenty of Potty Training books that she might like

How old is she?

She is 33 months but her communication skills are below average

Would it be worth doing more naked time? More time in pants? Or Huggies pull up trainer pants?

What made you do it in the first place? That will help guide what to do next

In early December one day she suddenly pulled down her trousers and nappy and squatted and did a poo in the kitchen which I took as a sign of readiness. I mentioned it to nursery and they said to give it a go over the Christmas holidays.

Yeah I’m not sure that’s a strong enough sign. I’d go back to nappies until she’s communicating that she needs to go or has just been regularly or expresses a desire to use the toilet

Take her out of nappies, give a pair of cotton pants . Emphasise these are real knickers, proper big girl pants, like Mum.
No trousers or dress; just a warm jumper. Then she can easily get her pants down. Do a bit of practise , DD pulling her own pants down and up again.

Place potty on floor and say "when you feel a wee coming, get your pants down and sit on potty.

TBH that's not really a sign of readiness to potty train, it's just a bit gross!

Five common signs of potty training readiness (according to Google):

1. They have dry nappies for at least an hour or two at a time.

1. They understand when they are having a wee and may tell you they’re doing one.

1. They recognise when they have a wet or dirty nappy and may pull at it, take it off or ask you to change it.

1. They show visible signs they need to go to the toilet, like fidgeting or going somewhere quiet or hidden.

1. They know when they need to wee and say so in advance.

I'd recommend doing a bit of research and finding a method that feels right for you. If her understanding isn't very good, you may need some additional support and advice to help you with this process.

This is basically what we did for 4 days but didn’t feel we were getting enough wees in the potty.
A friend reckons we should go with naked rather than cotton pants and we might catch more in the potty and build up that association that way?

The poo with her nappy pulled down was just a random one off incident that prompted me to wonder if she might be ready soon (probably in hindsight copying other kids at nursery who pull their pants down and poo on the potty) but she is showing some of the other signs of readiness too - commonly has dry nappy, hides when going for a poo. Her verbal communication is below average so I am looking for physical action signs where she can’t verbally express things.

Oh and the method we have been doing is Gina Ford Potty Training in One Week - but we are sort of repeating days rather than progressing through the 7 day programme.

Every time we are about to give up she does something slightly encouraging like today we came home and she immediately asked for the potty and then sat on it for 10 mins (but didn’t actually do anything on there!)

She's not ready

Maybe not referring to her in months for her age might be a good start.

I do the no bottoms thing in the house and just get on with it. Then comes the fun trying to get out of the house thing.

I don't miss potty training. But they all get there. All of them.

She doenst sound ready, having a poo on the kitchen floor is disgusting and I would have not put up with that. She would have been sent to time out, toys taken away, ect.

@reallyworriedjobhunter asked her age and saying she is 2 is not specific enough in the context of something developmental like potty training. Everything I have read about potty training refers to children’s ages in months, not years.

It was not necessary to discipline her as she did not pull her nappy down to be naughty or disgusting. She wasn’t laughing or deliberately trying to make a mess (in fact it was easier to clean up than pooing in her nappy as the poo landed neatly on the nappy around her ankles on the floor).

I believe she just wanted to poo outside her nappy like a potty trained child, but didn’t have the words to express that, and at that point we didn’t have a potty around so she did the best she could under the circumstances.

It might not feature in a list of signs of readiness for potty training but one sign is being able to pull clothes down, and it’s a reasonable assumption that she wants to stop pooing in her nappy by doing this.

Keep going! Sounds like she has made the association as she is pulling down her nappy. I don’t think verbal communication is necessarily that important (does she do Makaton signing? Or if you are able to be at home for a bit you can leave the potty out and she can be in charge of going to it so she doesn’t even need to tell you first. Obviously much more difficult if you have to be out and about etc. if at nursery they should support).

I found a sticker chart worked wonders.
qnd I did give a choc button for each wee on the potty (two for a poo!).

they do have a lot of accidents when they’re learning, some more than others but to me it sounds like she will get it if you hang on in there.

I would leave nothing on her bottom half at home. Has she got a jumper dress or something to wear. Have a couple of pottys dotted about.

This is harsh and teaches shame in what could be her just feeling how it is to poo without a nappy. It's not as if she's doing it all of the time from the sounds of it and smearing etc, even if she was as grim as it is it's an expression of some difficult emotion and time out/shaming is inappropriate

Shes nearly 3. She might not be ready until she is 3. It's nothing to stress out over though

Is she waiting until she's not being watched? I think some kids just take a bit longer to train than a few days and then have that annoying phase of going on the floor when no one's looking before things start to click with the potty.

Three are 3 stages. Telling you after. Telling you during. And telling you before.

If you think she's ready, then after she's done a wee or a poo, most times she's acknowledging it happened in some way. You want this to be verbal. That is, she is telling you she is ready. I imagine it would happen a few times. Find out what words she is using to communicate it. Check in with nursery ( that is, ask does she mention anything when having her nappy changed) let them tell you what words they think she is using.

In addition to potty books for parents, there are also books for children. We used pirate (pete?)

Don't be insane. I hope you don't have children.

Yes she does do some makaton and short spoken phrases and words, just not whole sentences.

we have been mostly at home and have left 2 potties out for her. It does seem to be clicking into place now on day 6 - she has sat on the potty twice already today and done a wee. Am rewarding her with a dinosaur magnet on a dinosaur potty chart which she is enjoying.

thanks for your supportive words - I think the signs are looking good today!

I agree with you @ASCADHDBAME - it’s not something to shame her over!