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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

DD - 4.5 Years Old - Still in Nappy Pants

33 replies

cooper82 · 01/02/2022 22:36

My DD is 4.5 and fully toilet trained when awake. But she’s still in nappy pants for night time. There no sign that she’s coming out of the nighttime wetness.

I know this is probably fine but I guess I’m posting this for reassurance that I’m not the only one in this situation.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

aalaosj · 01/02/2022 22:43

We are in this exact same situation too. We've tried a couple of times to crack the night time but we can't. Days no problems, no accidents etc. I'm trying not to stress and hoping we will get there soon.

welshweasel · 01/02/2022 22:48

My 6 year old is the same

NewYearEveryYear · 01/02/2022 22:49

I believe that the ability to stay dry at night is hormonal, and there is nothing that we can do to speed it up.

I wasn't reliably night time dry until I was 6yo, DD was night time dry at 3.

The.moat important thing is to keep them comfortable, confident, and not make it a big deal.

NewYearEveryYear · 01/02/2022 22:49

*the most

SuperSleepyBaby · 01/02/2022 22:50

My sons stopped using pull ups at night at age 9. They just eventually started staying dry at night.

My daughter is 4 and has lots of dry nights but is not reliable yet. I will leave her in pull ups as long as needed and not worry about it.

INeedNewShoes · 01/02/2022 22:52

I've read that this can be normal at this age.

It's not within their control I think - you just have to wait for a certain hormone to arrive.

I think you're doing the right thing by just waiting because trying to force the matter before she's showing signs of being dry over night will most likely just add stress which could make the problem worse.

With my DD, I waited until she'd not done a wee over night a few nights in a row then didn't put a pull-up on and made sure we had a really good waterproof mat (I like these:

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B06XWB9ZRX/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?psc=1&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&ie=UTF8

PollysPockets · 01/02/2022 22:54

My 4 1/2 year old DS is exactly the same. Has been dry/completely toilet trained in the day since before he was 3 but has to have a pull up at night still.
We have tried numerous different things but he always does a wee whilst fast asleep and it doesn’t even wake him up when he/the bed is soaked- despite him trying his best, wanting to be without a pull-up and also getting upset when he realises he did a wee in his sleep.
I’m sure I read somewhere that they need a certain hormone to be able to stay dry whilst asleep and so until this kicks in there’s not much that can be done. I don’t want to make a big deal out of it at the moment, as I don’t want to make him upset about it and make it worse somehow so I try and follow his lead. We try every now and then when he expresses he wants to try without a pull up, praise him for wanting to try and we give lots of reassurance that it’s ok when unfortunately he wets the bed.

TooOldandTired · 01/02/2022 22:57

It's hormonal and really nothing to worry about especially at 4.5.
My DD was about 6.5 when she started staying dry at night, in the end she really wanted to be dry so we got an alarm from the ERIC website which went off once or twice and then she was fine. My DS who is nearly 6 is still in pull-ups at night.

nervousseacreature · 01/02/2022 22:58

5yo boy still in them here

Original poster

cooper82 · 02/02/2022 07:57

@PollysPockets

My 4 1/2 year old DS is exactly the same. Has been dry/completely toilet trained in the day since before he was 3 but has to have a pull up at night still. We have tried numerous different things but he always does a wee whilst fast asleep and it doesn’t even wake him up when he/the bed is soaked- despite him trying his best, wanting to be without a pull-up and also getting upset when he realises he did a wee in his sleep. I’m sure I read somewhere that they need a certain hormone to be able to stay dry whilst asleep and so until this kicks in there’s not much that can be done. I don’t want to make a big deal out of it at the moment, as I don’t want to make him upset about it and make it worse somehow so I try and follow his lead. We try every now and then when he expresses he wants to try without a pull up, praise him for wanting to try and we give lots of reassurance that it’s ok when unfortunately he wets the bed.

I 100% am in the same boat as this. When she wants to try pants. We try pants at bedtime. If she wets them, we tell her it’s fine and not to worry. It seems normal by this forum that she’s still not got this hormone. Was just aware that DD friends are out of them and was really hoping by P1, she’d be out of them

OP posts:

Fantasea · 02/02/2022 21:53

As PPs say, it's due to the hormone. My DD was completely dry at 22 months yet was still in a nappy at night, which she soaked until she was 4. I had a friend whose son was in a nappy at night at 6. This was over 20 years ago now and didn't seem to be the issue it is for parents now, which is a shame as it must feel like another pressure. I reasoned I would rather change a nappy than a bed.

Fabuleuse · 02/02/2022 22:01

DS1 was just less than 4.5 and wearing overnight pull-ups which were always soaking when he suddenly woke up dry one morning. That continued and after a few nights we ditched the pull-ups and that was it. He's never wet the bed in his life. It was like a switch had been flipped. DS2 is 4 years 3 months and still in pull-ups at night. I'm hoping the same happens with him.

Userblabla · 02/02/2022 22:07

My DN is still wet 90% of nights at 12! It’s been quite common in my very large family with the boys, some of them into their teens. They’ve all stopped eventually.

Original poster

cooper82 · 03/02/2022 09:52

I wonder what the average age for kids to grow out of needing a nappy pant for night time?
I wouldn't be surprised it being more around the age 4 mark where the need for nappy pants starts to dwindle.

OP posts:

Steelesauce · 03/02/2022 10:19

Is she definitely wetting while asleep? I thought my almost 4 year old was but apparently she did it while awake. Took the nappies away last week, made sure she went before bed and the first few nights lifted her before I went bed. Been completely dry!

Original poster

cooper82 · 03/02/2022 10:39

We've put DD in pants as she wanted to try. We've checked her before we've gone to bed and sometimes she's already wet, sometimes they're not.

When she's been dry by the time we go to bed, shes wet by the morning and has slept right through.

OP posts:

sparklecrazy · 04/02/2022 13:21

5 year old twins here and still in pull ups for bed

Georgeskitchen · 04/02/2022 13:26

I wouldn't worry too much. All except one of mine were night dry by 4. One still night wetting at 6.5. I believe that night wetting won't be investigated till at least 7 years old. ( might have changed now, this was 25 years ago)

liveforsummer · 04/02/2022 13:39

@NewYearEveryYear

I believe that the ability to stay dry at night is hormonal, and there is nothing that we can do to speed it up.

I wasn't reliably night time dry until I was 6yo, DD was night time dry at 3.

The.moat important thing is to keep them comfortable, confident, and not make it a big deal.

This exactly. And lots of people with younger kids will say they are out of night nappies but will spend a lot of time changing wet sheets. This won't speed things up either just makes more work and disturbs sleep. They will grow pit of it eventually. Both mine were 5, can't remember at which point of being 5 though.

CaveMum · 04/02/2022 13:41

It’ll happen when it happens. DD was dry during the day just before she turned 3 but in nighttime pull ups till she was almost 5.5.
DS wasn’t dry during the day till 3.5 and in nighttime pull ups till 4.5.

amylou8 · 04/02/2022 13:57

Mine are in their 20s. They were all still in nappy pants at night when they started school. I can't remember exactly when they came out of them, but they're not still wearing them now, so all is good. Don't stress, she'll get there in her own time

ladygindiva · 04/02/2022 14:52

Just turned 5 yo twins here in exact same boat. Relieved I'm not alone!

Yellow85 · 04/02/2022 15:23

We switched to a pea pod mat instead and it really made a difference to my DC. Once they experienced the feeling of being wet it triggered something and we really turned a corner.

ClaraTheImpossibleGirl · 04/02/2022 23:19

@ladygindiva my twins (boys) are 6 now and still not both dry at night DTS1 has been dry at night for a few months but only if we get him up around midnight for a wee, whereas DTS2 - no chance yet! He's just in normal nappies as I found nappy pants a real PITA to change when he was asleep.

@Yellow85 I had the pea pod mats recommended too but I'm just not sure DTS2 would wake up even then, he's such a deep sleeper! I worry about him lying in a wet bed for hours and getting sore. He has a waterproof undersheet at the moment but it made no difference, he could be soaked through and it wouldn't wake him up!

BunnyRuddington · 06/02/2022 11:05

My DD was late in becoming dry at night compared to DS but it turned out she was just being lazy as when we put her in was able nappies she stayed dry as she didn't like the feeling of the wetness.

Not saying that you should put a 4.5 year old in cloth nappies but laziness is worth considering.

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