AIBU to not know what to do about the bedwetting?

[WidowWadman]

Daughter is 2.8 and has been dry during the nights without nappies for about 5-6 weeks, and a few weeks with dry night nappies before that.

She's currently on a course of antibiotics for a bladder infection, which was diagnosed last sunday after a couple of days of frequent accidents, and her having trouble using the potty.

She does not seem to have any pain anymore and doesn't struggle to use the potty at day time, or even in the evenings, when she will get up and take herself to the potty when she needs it (including emptying it into the toilet afterwards.

However, this is the third night in a row that she has wet her bed in the early hours of the morning. We've always simply changed her, stripped the dirty sheets off and let her sleep in our bed for the rest of the night. This morning she didn't even seem bothered by having wet herself anymore, but almost seems to see it as a routine.

So what can we do? Putting her back into nappies feels like a retrograde step.

Don't know whether it makes a difference, but the bladder infection and first accidents coincided with friends and their two children staying at our place for a week, during which she shared a room with the older girl, who's 6.

Any ideas? We're seeing the GP tomorrow again, to test the urine whether the antibiotic has worked, but I'm not sure whether this is something organic or has turned into something behavioural now.

Honey, my DS wasn't even potty trained till just after his 3rd birthday.

WRT to wees, he decided when he wanted to go without nappies and I took a deep breath and agreed to let him sleep without them.

He's 6 in December and in all that time has had a couple of accidents, usually when he is ill, a cold, a bug or run down. Your little girl has a bladder infection poor mite, of course she may have accidents until that is cleared up.

Talk to her, and say, that the condition/illness/ ow-ow - however you describe it, can make her wee more and not be able to stop it. explain to her that it's perfectly normal, that it's OK and that you think she'd be better off in pull up pants for a while until she is better and then she can sleep without them again.

The main thing you want to avoid is stressing or upsetting her about it all, so be calm, matter of fact and say that ALL children have accidents, especially while they are not very well. Give her a great big cuddle from me?

I personally was a late wetter too, star charts eventually did it, I sleep like a DEAD person, nothing wakes me up...

erm, by later wetter too I was referring to the others on here, not you OP!

devonshiredumpling I didn't have anything sophisicated like that.
I did have vile blue tablets.

I remember having thick plastic sheeting on my bed.It kept all the fluid on the sheet, so in effect on me. I had to sponge it down when I changed my sheets.
My mother used to make sure the sheets and plastic sheets were hung out in full view. (Maybe to embaress me into stopping?)
I couldn't let friends sit on my bed because it rustled.

My DCs were late by most standards but I hope I handled it better for them.I would never hang their waterproof sheets out in full view. They had the fitted sheet with terry on one side and a soft rubber on the back.
And I would never send them out without a bath and fresh undies.
I remember going to school in peed knickers and no wash

She is not even three yet, some children wet the beds on and off until they are 7. The kid next door is 7 and still has accidents. It goes with the territory.

Dont push her too hard she is still very young and won't be dry at night properly constantly for years yet.

WidowWadman-
as everyone here has posted, your DD is still very young.

Maybe she felt as bit inhibited having people stay over in her room.Maybe didn't feel comfortable using her potty.
I don't think it will do any harm to let her use pull-ups rather than nappies (they are a bit more Big Girl) while she is unwell. My DD used to use them when she was 'ill little girl'.Sometimes a step back, sometimes they just want to feel a bit pampered and babied for want of a better word.You all need a good nights sleep.
She will let you know when she's better and wants to try again without.

It is very difficult to completely empty your bladder with an ITU. Don't know if you've ever had one yourself but trust me.I have. That little residue provides an ideal environment for bacteria.

Good luck.

2.8 is very young and as others have said it will pass. You are exceptionally lucky to have had her dry at night at this age tbh. Probably not behavioural at this age. Just use rewards if she is dry if you think its behavioural but I really wouldn't panic. DD1 was 5 before she became dry and still has occasional accidents at 5.7yo!

LordoftheFlies my heart goes out to you . I wet until I was 12 and got called names by my mother but never went to school unwashed or smelling xx

I also had kidney investigations, antibiotics, star charts, alarms etc but to no avail and like LOTF slept like the living dead! Still do as recently dd1 was sick in the night and DH vaxed without it waking me up

Thank you captain.
I sat my DCs down on day ,after lugging 2 sheets, 2 waterproof sheets, 2 sets of PJs and 2 duvets with covers (they could thoroughly pee my DCs even after being lifted late night and explained to them that mummy isn't cross because I used to do exactly the same.
I think that's why they understood and grew out of it of their own accord and without trauma. Unless you count the trauma of how much I spent on detergents.

But although I told my DCs , I've never told my DH. No reason why, just haven't.So many times when he despaired at the DCs I came soooo close to yelling "Well I used to p*ss the bed till I was at least 14, maybe more".

Bit of an over-use of faces in that post, but it's a sensitive subject.

OFG sake put her back in nappies and get over it, oh and putting her in your bed is a no no your just getting yourselves into another problem there

Your child is 2.8 not 8.2..
Why do you think they make bedtime pull ups/ pads for age 7-14?

As a child I was a bedwetter and then my oldest son was as well (until he was 15). There was a medical problem (wont go into it here as your little one is still very young).

I would stop worrying about it and just either put her back in nappies or put a waterproof under her sheet and wash linen/pj's every day.

Whatever you do, dont make her feel bad for it at all. I personally, have never met a child who does it just because they want to or because they being difficult for the sake of it.

Just put her in pullups and make everyone's life easier.

DS1 wasn't even day trained by then an wore night pullups till he was about 5.

It really doesn't matter in the long term.

She's only 2.8... Put her in pull ups and wait until she's ready again. I mean, for goodness sake, I was still doing it at 13 - that's a problem. I also don't agree with limiting fluids before bedtime - if someone's thirsty, they're thirsty. And she's too young to be sneaking drinks when she really needs them, so just don't do it.

Shes 2.8yo!!!!

No-one will even consider bedwetting as worrying or a problem until a child hits 7yo and is still doing it regulary.

My DS was dry (nights) at 3 and that was a year after he was dry daytime, and then had a relapse a year later when he started school. So pull-ups and at 4.6 was dry again. He's 7 today and still has an occassional accident. I just use an incontinence pad under the sheet in case.

Thanks again for your replies. We've just been given another course of antibiotics, because there's still signs of infection in her urine (but she didn;t manage a big enough sample for it to be sent off) and I'm picking up some pull-ups again. She did wet again last night, but only a small quantity, she didn't even wake up from, I only noticed her pyjama pants being wet in the morning. She doesn't like or want nappies, but I will try and explain to her that it's only because she's got a poorly bladder. We're going for another check-up in a week's time and I hope the antibiotics will have done their job in the mean time

For clarification - I'm aware she is still very young. I wouldn;t have worried at all if she had never been dry at all in the night. The only reason I have asked is, because she has been dry at night, without pressure, but waking by herself and not wettting, for a while before this infection and I simply wanted to have some other (experienced) people's opinion on how to best deal with the relapse.

I have never told my daughter off for wetting herself, neither during the day nor at night and never tried any potty training methods at night, but just waited for her to be ready.

I haven't put pressure onto her to get dry during the night, other than given her lots of praise. Some of the posters seem to imply that I've taken nappies off her against her will and pressurised her into being dry, just because of her young age. That's not the case, she wanted rid of them and I thought it's worth asking about how to best go about it in the current situation.
I wasn't aware, that it's wrong to do that when the child is not past a cut off point several years away. I'm usually not parenting by calendar.

Thanks for your help

Haven't read all the thread so apologies if I am repeating others. She is still very young and lots of children her age still wet the bed.

I bought a special sheet on line, cannot remember where from but it was designed for adults so did say it would be completely protective for over 100 washes. They also did many different sizes so you can measure your dds matress. I would also recommend those disposable mats by huggies. They are quite big and go on top of the sheet and so you don't have to strip the bed, just throw away the mat.
Perhaps put your dd back into nighttime pants. Again huggies do a special night time pull up.
As for drinks I was told that a child should be encouraged to drink regularly throughout the day to make the bladder work properly,but no bed time drink.
I know it is very upsetting for both you and your dd but she will grow out of it.

ta for but am supposed to be on diet. first one i've ever had, so something of a milestone.

hadn't meant to upset, but it was kind of an only-on-mn-thread that tickled me - a 2yo with a uti wetting the bed. only on mn would anyone ask how to deal with this. pull ups, bed mats, more fluids and more anti-b's. it's not rocket science.

but hopefully you've got the info you needed now.

all i can say now is good luck and please try cranberry juice as one of her daytime drinks as it is really good for the whole urinary system

I agree with cranberry juice as its really good for UTIs.
I also agree with using a bedtime sheet at night to protect the matress.
Children do relapse and it is quite normal so just carry on.
LOTF it is so demoralising and it really affected my confidence at the time and later so for those going through it .....relax and don't get cross. xx
OP I didn't assume you were pushy and can understand the concern regarding going back to wetting......just go with the flow and pardon the pun!

PS children need at least 6 x 200ml drinks during the day to effectively flush their kidneys and produce urine that isn't too strong. Best advice being no drinks about 1 hour before bedtime xx