Time/experiences of hospital Post Natal Wards.

[MsMiaWallace]

Ive just had DC3. I had to stay 4 days on the ward.
My other 2 were straight forward births so didn't have to stay long on ward.

I have been left quite shell shocked after my time on the ward.
I never realised how bad it really is.
The staff are like machines. They literally never stop. The care element is none existent as there is simply no capacity.
There is so much room for error & vulnerable mums to slip through the net.

Does anyone else have experiences to share?

I've had 2 babies at the same hospital and both times were pretty awful.
1st induction/epidural-emergency c-section. Lost too much blood. Was out of it for 12 hours after getting back to delivery suite. Then woken and asked why baby not feed.
Nurse in panic as you need skin on skin BF time. I was just so drugged up, they never woke me! Then had every midwife in hospital trying to get my son to latch on. He never did and they made me feel awful. I was then sat in chair cuddling my son skin on skin and he poo'd all over me. They wouldn't let me shower! My DP cleaned us up.
As soon as I was on the ward I wanted a shower but already had visitors let in I looked and felt awful. I wanted everyone to FOFF. I was on ward for 1 week whilst on a drip to replace the iron. Toilets/showers were horrible I asked everyday to go home. Also in this time I had a major attack of pain and was sent to x ray in the middle of the night with a male porter who was just like lurch. I was left in a room for hours then returned and told I was constipated. When I asked for pain relief I was told there were other people in pain my love. I will get to you when I can!
Turned out it was my gallbladder. I think they knocked it or moved it during c-section. Had surgery to remove it when my son was 3 months after 3 further painful attacks. My own GP diagnosed me straight away.

2nd son I made my mind up no help with BF (I was 39) Ended up with another c-section but it was better. Was being discharged and was then told baby had to stay because he jaundice. Again I felt midwifes to forward with BF pushed it too much. Also there were a lot of foreign women having babies. No problem until an Indian ladies extended family turned up like 8 of them with 2 children that keep on running around, screaming, peeping into my space. I complained onto deaf ears. They seemed to break the rules but that was ok. My eldest son came once to visit his new brother. He was told to be quiet and calm he was.
I never had DC3.

Horrible. When I had my ds 16 years ago I had to stay in for 2 nights as I had had a forceps delivery after 2 failed attempts at ventouse. I felt shocked, battered and bruised and could barely move at first.
Ds was born late at night and in the morning I asked a nurse if she could help me to the shower. I did not want her to hang around, just help me get there as I was unsteady and in pain. She told me it wasn't possible as she was too busy. Also I had no breakfast as you were expected to leave your baby and walk down the corridor to a dining room to eat. Ds was screaming and I couldn't just leave him, plus movement was excruciating. I asked a nurse if they could possibly save me some food and was told that it wasn't possible.
A lady came round handing out teas and coffees. I didn't want a hot drink, but was very thirsty and asked if I could have a drink of water. She told me no, she only did tea and coffee. A lady who was visiting a new mother in the next bed heard the exchange and kindly went and got me a jug of water.
I was made to feel that I was just an inconvenience and from others experience this seems the norm on postnatal wards. I have never been hospitalised for anything else but know from people that have, that it is totally different on other wards so why are new mothers treated so poorly?

Mine was good to be fair, and I spent a month there. The staff were all great apart from one midwife and one auxiliary.

The mid wife was rude, and to be honest creepy. She was staring so hard in between my legs when I was getting a high vaginal swab from a doctor he actually asked her to,leave the room and stopped till he could get another midwife to replace her. It was so uncomfortable for both him and I.

The auxiliary actually said when I was readmitted that I was there for the “free food” and didn’t wish to care for my child. She then barged in the next day and said “so what free food do you want today” quickly followed by “oh Doctor is here”. And then “oh you’re on a drip”

Past that the staff worked incredibly hard, the care levels were excellent, they saved my life, literally as I developed full blow eclampsia after the birth and started fitting in the middle of the night, and then post natal renal failure.

I was made to feel that I was just an inconvenience and from others experience this seems the norm on postnatal wards. I have never been hospitalised for anything else but know from people that have, that it is totally different on other wards so why are new mothers treated so poorly?

Exactly this. New mothers are treated with contempt for being incapacitated and in need of ACTUAL NURSING. Doesn’t happen on any other ward. It’s a poisonous culture of misogyny that punishes mothers for not immediately shrugging off their pain and trauma because they’re mothers now and need to put their babies first. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had a traumatic birth, a birth injury or surgery... you are selfish if you can’t skip down a corridor to fetch your own food, or if you can’t lift your baby from the cot.

I don’t think new mothers are treated so badly in any other country, it’s just a toxic culture that been allowed to develop and hasn’t been challenged.

@Haworthia could not agree more!

Two very different experiences, same hospital.

DC1 failed induction, the IOL part was bad (butch midwife effectively fisting a 4th pessary up there after I said no) but the CS aftercare was immense. Considerate, careful and we had a room with three beds - only one other occupant for the 5 days I was there. Bliss.

Cut to 18 months later, I was left to just get on with it, DS was borderline in need of SCBU and not one person gave a fucking shit, he just wasn’t “right”. Discharged and then back in 9 days as he had suspected meningitis.

Same hospital. Eighteen months apart. Madness.

If I have another baby I’d be so tempted to go private just to get the same care as my friends in Netherlands and Denmark... except I’d be thousands out of pocket just to be able to have a few minutes with a fucking doctor and not be patronised to death.

My experience earlier this year was overall positive, although I was still very glad to be discharged!

The good things:
The food!
Regular pain relief offered.
All the staff were polite, professional and kind, although clearly very busy.
Great support for breastfeeding, with the exception of the woman who could only bark 'don't touch the back of baby's head!' at everyone. Sure, but I wasn't, and either way DS still wasn't able to latch!

The bad:
One toilet/shower shared between 8 women. Obviously in constant use and once I wet myself waiting for it to become available
The woman in the bed next to me clearly had a lot of issues and was pretty disruptive.
Lack of dignity about things like producing urine samples.
Never saw the same person more than once so limited continuity of care and not brilliant communication.
The temperature. Dear goodness why so hot???