Breastfeeding dread

[Lauraemiky33]

I have a 2 week old and have been breastfeeding him on demand since he's been born. But I hate doing it. my heart sinks when baby wakes and I have to feed him. I've started to express but it takes a good hour to get enough as he's very hungry and I try and save the bottle for night so my partner can help out. I've started to give him one formula bottle a night in the hope that he sleeps a bit longer but it doesn't seem to make a lot of difference.
My partner and I keep arguing as I want to just bottle feed but he wants baby to have breast milk and although I know it is my decision I feel I can't just stop.
The thought of breast feeding for the next 6 months fills me with dread. Does anyone else feel the same?

What is it about breastfeeding that you are hating so much? There's always something you can do about individual issues. I think I'm quite lucky as I've taken to it pretty well, but I do recognise a lot of the issues people mention here. One of the best things I did was speak to a maternity support worker who specialises in breastfeeding help right at the start - she really helped with a lot of my issues. My baby is now 6 weeks old, and I can't imagine dealing with the inconvenience of formula feeding. I have had to come up with a lot of fixes for problems along the way, though - I've got used to jamming a cloth under my boob when I feed because of the milk spray, I wear black a lot to avoid visible damp patches, I buy packs of 240 lansinoh breast pads, I had a week of using nipple shields, etc, etc. It's bloody hard being the only one who can feed my baby but it's also really rewarding. Seeing him smiling at me around the breast and falling asleep all milk drunk and knowing that when he feeds he is feeling as comforted and content as he can possibly be is wonderful. It's like having a magical power to make him happy.

If you feel you aren't getting a break from baby, and yes, you do need one don't feel guilty for it! Get your partner to do every single nappy change, esp through night and settling baby back to sleep. This will massively increase how much you can sleep and rest.
I found feeding DD1 very difficult and husband doing the above and getting sleep myself really helped. In the end she breast fed for 6 weeks then we did combined feeding till 9 months. This worked really well as I got a break and it alleviated guilt about getting some breast milk in her for anti bodies etc.
For DD2 it was a breeze, it just worked somehow. So if you have any more don't assume it will be the same experience.

La Leche League are great to contact for support. they really help to recognise different emotions at different phases of breast feeding and have advisors and support network, they are a charity so free too.
Hugs