Cost of living out of control

[Ev01]

Do you think more women return to work because they are forced to or because they choose to? From friends and women I speak to, I feel like the right to mother your own child is generally becoming something for the well off as the cost of living is now so high. My mum and my nan were full time mums and I assumed I would be, but I fell in love with a teacher whose wages only cover the mortgage, not the food and heating bills, so like others (most?) I had to return to work to cover the basics. Angry at the government for going on about getting mums for toddlers back to work or more nursery places, when it feels no one is fighting for the right to mother your own child by sorting the cost of living out. Does the government not think the role of a mother is important? Aren't we beginning to shove babies into institutions so mum's can help grow the economy by paying for ever increasing living costs? Would love a campaign to join as it feels so wrong putting a child under one into a nursery.

And at the other end of the spectrum, some people have to worry about how to avoid the stamp duty on their latest purchase.

And another huge benefit of staying at home is that you are at home to fix the leak, or the broken boiler, or deal with the sick child, without having to piss off your boss.

Mini, you don't have to be so defensive about it. It's a genuine question. Rabbitstew is right about me not keeping receipts etc. i just have all the bills and mortgage come out automatically from the account . I do shop for deals but not on a weekly grocery shop basis. More on things like insurance. We arent rich, aren't even higher rate tax payers, have a large mortgage. We seldom eat out, buy new clothes, always amazed by how friends can afford all those holidays. But I feel lucky in this climate that our income can at least cover our outgoing comfortably.

And yes it's nice to not have to worry about covering for sickness, delivery and the tradespeople! My last job allows a lot of working from home. It's very handy.

Unfortunately, working as a nursery worker or cleaner, or other low paid work often done by women through economic necessity, requires you to turn up to your place of work. Flexible working and working from home can't be a reality for everyone.

Time and again you hear women saying that they need to work through necessity but can not afford to do so. Some women would like to return to work even if their work isn't particularly rewarding financially.

Women who have highly paid jobs are often more likely to return because they can afford childcare. Although some of my friends who had brilliant jobs have opted to stay at home because having met equally well paid men, they have that choice available to them.

So again, it is often women from the most disadvantaged circs in lower paid work who both need to work because their partner earns very little but can't work because childcare is prohibitively exp.

The answer really is universal childcare, children can not be means tested and it should be on the basis that high quality nursery education is beneficial to the child. Work needs to pay, some women's organisations are calling for well paid part time work for mothers. No one can create these fantasy jobs but we do need to address poor wages and inequality. It isn't just two wages driving up costs, its the fact that the wealth at the top stimulates rising costs too.

Much as I think that the cost of child care in the UK is criminal I just can't realistically see tax payer funded child care being sold to the general public right now. There is a slow burning realisation that unless taxes rise massively, public spending is now a zero sum game. Raise child care funding - decrease funding for elderly care/transport/cancer research etc.

People have come to expect European public service quality and yet still pay 20% income tax. No politician has the balls to explain that this isn't actually possible. Not in the long term anyway.

As for "sorting out" the cost of living - any ideas OP? It's unfair to everyone and I do think that this and future generations, male or female, parents or not, have a harsh deal compared to the baby boomers. I can't however, see an easy answer.

Think it is hard to afford staying at home with current house prices and I think good child care and flexible working hours should become more available.

True, parents who stay at home aren't really valued in our currently driven society which is a shame and for many people an unaffordable choice anyway.

I want to deviate slightly. I'm a professional mum who has chosen to work part - time for 14 years which has been a good balance for me. For a long time, I could not get permanent contacts part - time as part-time posts were less available a decade and a half ago and now promotion is not really available for me. I have a good fulfilling job and am well respected but not fully invested in as a part-timer and job shares non- existent.

Shouldn't parents be given consideration to develop in the workplace alongside raising a family? It seems there is no real middle ground, maybe our children will get this sorted out.

The answer really is universal childcare, children can not be means tested and it should be on the basis that high quality nursery education is beneficial to the child.

In principle I agree with you. It would be lovely to see childcare be universally available and for all who want to use it.

The problem of course is where such a pot of money would come from? We already provide up to 70% childcare via tax credits to people earning up to a certain amount. To make that 100% for all people would make it eye wateringly expensive.

Taxes no doubt would have to rise or cuts found elsewhere.

Is it not expensive to administer tax credits? would it be better to pay child care workers and invest in children's education and welfare or would it be better to pay tax bods?

Funding free child care to help women to work perpetuates childcare as womens responsibility rather than a change in attitudes to offset the cost of care against household income, starting with pl instead of ml. We do already invest in childrens welfare and education. The solution cannot always be 'the state provides'. most people need to be responsible for their own lives and those of their children, most of the time.