Advent - day by day

[Bababa]

Hello.

Would anyone like to join me with thoughts / meditations / prayers for Advent time?

I've not consciously celebrated Advent for YEARS but feel a strong need to do so this year. Been fairly dark times inside me recently (Pnd) and it's dark outside too (live in the north of Scotland) so I have been much occupied with images of Light and Hope and Life returning through the darkness.

I am just beginning to feel that I may well be a Christian still (or is that again?) after being very put off by dogmatic upbringing - but it seems that so many themes of Advent are human and universal so welcome all and everyone and all your thoughts!

I'm going to post daily thoughts and see what happens...

the official JW website
i don't know how helpful it'll be in answering questions though.

Thank you all of you!

No time to check things right now or answer.

Does this happen to anyone: when your Mum comes to visit you really look forward to seeing her but then after a few hours mysteriously you start getting stressed out and annoyed by her? My Mum SO doesn't do it on purpose, she's lovely, it's just me. And it's been even more so since DS was born.

So today has been a chance to do patience meditations, breathing deeply and counting to 10. Very humbling, with all my good intentions for Advent...

We went to Maes Howe though so she could see the sunset light. AMAZING.

Mornin'.

NotTheVirgin - I'd never ever thought of Mary as a prophetess! Had been taught the "meek submissive servant role model" version of Mary. I've been thinking of what you wrote a LOT and want to follow it up (some distant day when I have time).

DO - I didn't mean "just do whatever makes you happy". I meant that if someone's faith makes them a)more happy and b) ALSO kinder to others that that seems like a good thing to me. I know simple formulas are silly, especially when talking of religion, but there are so many religions/religious people who seem to be unhappy and/or unkind. I mean, what's the point of being happy if you're horrible to everyone and spread misery? And what's the point of being all kind and nice if you exude unhappiness while you're doing it? Hope that makes sense...only had one coffee this morning after not much sleep..

Will look for that book CS

Thank you again for the suggestion of the "whywearewaiting" website. Today's prayer there shocked me (to ASK for darkness??) and at the same time makes absolute sense to me, especially as I sit here watching the dawn creep up. Its been dark since 3pm yesterday here.

O God

of the desert and the dawn;

amidst the many noises

and dazzling glare

in our lives

help us to find a place

quiet enough to hear your voice

and dark enough to see your light.

Bababa, Yes I know what you mean with your mother, it happened between me and my mother and also between me and my daughter. I think it is very normal, you may be very alike and then small irritations grate.
You are on the right track with 'practising patience' which is a fruit of the spirit. Try to build in a bit of separateness, early night or something like that.
Glad you went to see Maes Howe together. How long is she staying?
Because I moved abroad when my parents came, they stayed for weeks rather than days and I was always pleased when they went home again. I'm not so far from my daughter, so we can do a day at the time, but I'm sure if I was there for a week we would get on each other's nerves, however much we tried not to.

Bababa, I wrote an essay on Mary, and that was a small extract from it. Funnily enough I'm due to preach on the Magnificat on 20 December, so will probably use some of the stuff in my essay! The essay title was along the lines of "Your church has been given a statue of the virgin mary, and you have to explain why some people would find this uncomfortable". I had to explore the traditions of the church, the role of Mary in "expelling" other belief systems, even the role of Mary as meek and submissive, thus setting the pattern for a male-dominated church culture - "you should be like Mary"!

Mum left today after what was actually a lovely lovely few days together. I have a LOT more patience with her (and in general) now that I've become a Mum myself. I see more of her in myself (you're spot on there DO about similarity=small irritations) and imagine myself at her age and DS being impatient with me. Puts things very much in perspective!

DO, we are actually in the middle of grappling with the Big Question of whether we stay in Orkney (beautiful place, small and lovely community but equally very far from friends and family "Doon Sooth" and zero anonymity/confidentiality/privacy) or move back South (more built up and anonymous but also closer to family, friends, support and work for me). So your experience of short times with family rather than weeks of visiting rings many bells. Another ingredient to add to the mix of questioning...

NTV, I'd love to read your essay! And hear you preach! I was brought up in Italy: after my extremely Catholic
brainwashing upbringing I still get a wee jolt of shocked delight when I hear of a woman preaching. All new explorations of Mary's role and significance delight me too. Thanks so much for all the food for though - I should keep an Advent Thoughts journal but where to find the time..

This evening the very funky lady's choir I sing in is giving a concert. Off to practice my parts. This morning I found again this very joyful part of Psalm 57 I'll be holding in my head all day:

My heart is steadfast, O God,
my heart is steadfast;
I will sing and make music.

Awake, my soul!
Awake, harp and lyre!
I will awaken the dawn.

I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations;
I will sing of you among the peoples.

For great is your love, reaching to the heavens;
your faithfulness reaches to the skies.

Be exalted, O God, above the heavens;
let your glory be over all the earth.

Bababa, if you CAT me your email, I'd be happy to send it to you . I had a v. strict catholic upbringing before deserting "the one true faith" . There's a fantastic AND interesting book on Mary, edited by Carl Braaten, which is a series of chapters on the different Christian traditions, which I felt really helped.

Mary

Thank you! I will CAT (all new terminology to me...) you after this.

Dh has been away for the past 2 days so have been full of babyness and not posting here.

To make up for yesterday's mad blur, an email from a friend with a poem that somehow really got me. I for one have very much struggled with the whole God=Jesus=immensity-in-tiny-baby thing. Am still struggling, I suppose. It just all seems a bit too much. Hmm. Anyway, this poem spoke to that bit of my bumbling mind.

__

"Mary?s Song" by Luci Shaw

Blue homespun and the bend of my breast
keep warm this small naked star
fallen to my arms.
(Rest ? you who have had so far to come.)
Now nearness satisfies the body of God sweetly. Quiet he lies
whose vigour hurled
a universe. He sleeps
whose eyelids have not closed before.
His breath (so slight it seems
no breath at all) once ruffled the dark deeps
to sprout a world.
Charmed by doves voices, the whisper of straw
he dreams,
hearing no music from his other spheres.
Breath, mouth, ears, eyes
he is curtailed
who overflowed all skies,
all years.
Older than eternity, now he
is new. Now native to the earth as I am, nailed
to my poor planet, caught that I might be free,
blind in my womb to know my darkness ended,
brought to this birth
for me to be new-born,
and for him to see me mended
I must see him torn.

in the sermon on sunday, the minister was talking about when mary went to see her sister and (sister's) baby kicked around to show that he knew that mary's baby was important. suddenly for me, the whole thing seemed so much more real: she's 2 weeks away from having the baby and it's announcing to the whole world that it's truly special!

at the other church they've been doing these monologues of the min players (mary and joseph) about how they felt and how they chose to do god's will. it all sounds so extreme and far-fetched to our ears, but they had so much faith then: they were willing to risk their entire lives and reputation on looking after the son of god.

Horrible flu throat virus - sorry for incommunicado days

For a taste of something completely different, an Advent offering from yet another friend of mine: atheist advent thoughts and songs. What do you think?

Feeling rubbish. Will go away and fight off virus and self-pity.

Why is waiting so hard to do well (ie with calm, awareness, trust etc)? Why do our minds turn so easily to impatience? Had a day of worrying about the packaging of Christmas as if it matters, planning making lists sorting out things for next week/month/year while being stressed out and fluey. It's all so silly but it amazes me - I'm not alone in these tendencies.

Hmm.

Maybe it's all connected to trust; to the fact that it is hard for me (and most other humans??) to truly trust in the unknown. Whether that unknown is the future, the weather, or God. So I (we?) try to put whatever control possible on the terrifying unknown, by planning it all in advance. It is dawning on me that waiting, truly peaceful waiting, requires MASSIVE capacity for letting go of the desire to control what is to come.

Hope your advents are proving...interesting? yes, interesting and full.

And just think of the waiting and the trust that Mary had to do and have. What if she had said no? What if Joseph had said no to supporting her?

We have it a lot easier, in that God doesn't ask us to do something so momentous. No wonder that "all generations call her blessed" (from today's gospel reading)

Was it yesterday you were going to preach, NTVM?

Today was the Solstice! Amazing time to me. I imagine the earth swinging and turning in all the immensity of space, everything so calibrated and precise, spinning just exactly so that as of tomorrow the days start getting that wee bit longer...until the Summer Solstice and it all goes back again, like a giant pendulum. Orkney today was all white land and black bruised sky. Didn't see one colour that wasn't shades of white, grey or black all day. Extraordinary.

I wonder what it's like to celebrate Advent in Australia? Anyone ever done it?

Would there have been a Solstice-time festival that Mary and Joseph would have celebrated, around now? Is Jewish Hanukkah fixed or movable with lunar months?

Hmm, am noticing that as Advent progresses my mind is filling with more questions. Gives sitting in stillness a whole other tricky dimension.

Hope your Solstice has been good.

Baba - thank you for reminding us that yesterday was solistice. I'm so wrapped up in pre-Christmas rush that solistice had passed me by--- along with last posting dates!!. Your description of Orkney was quite beautiful.

As for questions - I'm getting lots of them as well. I was wondering how long it would have taken Mary and Joseph to get from Nazareth to Bethlehem on foot / donkey -- 70 miles is a long way.

Another thought - if Mary had been on MN - what would she have written..?! Probably something on the Am I Unreasonable thread along the lines of... "We're walking 70 miles to Bethlehem, I'm heavily pg and now DH tells me he hasn't booked a hotel........"

This would be followed a week later by the following "Three men have turned up with some presents for DS, but what am I meant to do with Gold Frankisence and Myrhh? THey didn't keep the receipts so I can't take them back....

I'm wittering on......
Off to work

SantaInSlingBacks, I did just such a thread last year, where I pretended to by the BVM on MN, wonder if I can find it...?

Bababa, yes, I preached on Sunday. Also took the carol service in the afternoon, which was very daunting as the church had a lot more people in than I was expecting!

... here you go, last year's thread

SantaInSlingbacks, am still laughing at your post! Shared them with my (very fab) MIL who's up visiting, she's now chuckling too. Such witterings are very much appreciated

NTVM, have read your essay. Very very good stuff, methinks. And (you guessed it) I have many questions which will be emailed to you when I find time...you have been warned...does "taking" a carol service mean you were the one standing up with the microphone leading everyone else in song? If so much respect. Sounds as if your preaching is appreciated if lots of folk turned up

The world is very silent up here. Hardly any cars are about as the snow has frozen everywhere. Walking out today with DS I heard only one flock of geese in 45 minutes; the only other sound was my breathing and my boots crunching in the snow. My meditation/thought of today has been to think of the sounds of Mary's breath and heartbeat as her Baby would have been aware of them. Really hard at first but then beautiful. Also a good way to force my mind to stop its questions even for a wee while.

Off to look at your thread NTVM

Mary you are a GENIUS !!!!!

Hadn't laughed that much in months

You are a GENIUS !!!!!

Hadn't laughed that much in months

Managed to post that twice somehow...you get the idea?

LOL, Bababa, glad you liked it!

Yes, I was upfront with the mike, although not leading the singing as the choir did all that. Don't think its anything to do with me, the numbers attending, just that people like turning out for that sort of event, because it makes them feel Christmassy. We probably won't see some of them till next year!

Talking about heartbeats, when I was pregnant I loved listening to two heartbeats on the foetal monitor - both mine and the baby (obviously, I'm not Dr Who!). Because 2 lives are being lived, not one, and it is part of that journey of life. Mary and Jesus more than most, because of who Jesus is. (Notice, I said IS, not WAS, because he is alive in all of us )

Feel free to send me questions, I like thinking about the answers, because I learn too.

It feels sad that advent is over! But happy that Christmas celebrations have happened, with all that they mean.

That's the biggest discovery at the end of this Advent season, for me - it has felt like a long, heavy and difficult time but I already miss it. I miss the sense of expectancy, waiting and daily thread of meditations. Practising waiting and stillness felt like wearing an irritating itchy garment, but I realise that it brought a growing trust and awareness of daily beauty.

So, how to continue with Advent type days after Advent?

Hmmm.

Thank you for listening to what may have been a fairly incoherent series of thoughts

And happy New Year too

Perhaps this time between Advent and New Year could be a time of thinking, and you could use what you learned during Advent to build a resolution based on it?

Happy New Year!

Yes, I have done some good thinking over the past few weeks. And had a brilliant New Year with friends who helped with much needed clarity on many things.

Wanted again to say thanks for sharing Advent thoughts...and hope 2010 treats you all well

:-)

You too, bababa

Not long till Lent now