Does anyone have a daily meditation practice? Would anyone like one but needs motivation?

[mangolassi]

Ooh, I feel all shy

I am agnostic and generally confused about spiritual things, but after recovering from a bout of pnd found a great book - The Mindful Way Through Depression. It has a programme of daily meditation, and I've tried in the past, but it's soooo hard to stick to with no support.

The meditation style in the book is 'western insight' - basically vipassana with the Buddhism taken out - but it would be great to have a thread for anyone trying to get started with daily practice, whatever kind of meditation appeals. Even better if there's anyone who actually has a daily practice already

their there

HI everyone just back from a mindful trip to the pub! What I love about this thread is the fact I'm surrounded by fellow Amazon addicts who also have shelves of unread books. I thought I was alone but it seems there's loads of us out there!
That aside, I don't know why BFM (the orange cover) is in so much demand. Maybe there's a black market in Sarah N's works? I think I"m going to write to her publisher and find out what's going on.

Re: Buddha Day - some FWBO groups in London are having events, according to their website. Sadly I can't go but keep us posted on when you're doing the meditation I will try to join in (in between ballet class and ice skating and RL!).

Katie - positive vibes coming your way regarding the forthcoming wedding of your ex. This is irrelevant to this thread- but when I got married my DD (then 3) announced in front of registrar: I want my Daddy - who was not the man I had just married. God knows what the registrar thought! I was mortified.

PB - v sorry to hear of your friends loss. At moments of crisis like this CHristians would pray but what do Buddhists do if they can't pray. I haven't found an answer to that in Guru Sarah's book.

Take care all.

hello you lovely girls, thank you for supportive vibes. they are already having their effect - i just posted a congratulatory card to The ex and his New Beloved
...pb, am SO sorry about your friend and his dad. i think you're right - sudden deaths must be so hard to bear. my buddhist friend up in the wild welsh hills near here says that a slow lingering death is in many ways a blessing on the spiritual front. i would never presume to say whether that is true or not (he is very prone to sweeping statements of this sort and i have learned to be a little careful in my interpretation of them!)but i do think the ability to say goodbye properly and make your peace with someone you know is 'going over' must count for a lot, and your friend was robbed of that opportunity. he and you are in my thoughts.
pink fluffy - we need justa back, don't we, on the topic of christian prayer versus buddhist...what, exactly? what i would say is that meditating on another's pain is hugely beneficial both for them and for you, that's what i have come to believe at least. holding them in your heart, expanding your own capacity for love and for compassion around their presence in your heart as you meditate - to me that is prayer, and i would be really interested to see what justa will say to us about it. the book 'living buddha living christ' by thich nhat hahn is really excellent on this topic. another one for that swaying pile by your bedside
...oh lordy, i'd better start work! back later - hugs to all and thank you for being here, you are all helping me so much

Positive vibes to all those that need them! And your friend peanut, that is just awful, I just have to think about losing my dad who is one of my good friends and the tears well up, it must be awful to actually go through that. I hope he has many supportive people like yourself around him to help him through the really difficult bit.

And I still haven't got around to looking at the meditation retreats yet - I have to stay at work tomorrow until 10pm (!!!) so I am betting on having a bit of time then to look at the sites.

saffy I think the book you are looking for is the first one with the orange cover. The second of her books iirc is about toddlers - which is when a great deal of patience and calm practice would come in very useful I think . It's a shame you can't get it anymore - maybe they have run out (what's journo speak for end of the line in books?)

peanut can you remind me again what fwbo is - I am interested in joining some kind of group probably this Autumn and am hunting around for options.

Otherwise my meditation is coming in small packets but going quite strong. This morning I went for a run at 6 (for me that is a big ) and I used it as a chance to just be, and now at work I feel quite calm and relaxed. It's a good way to start the day.

I also had a chat with the naturalist woman at work, she gave me a questionnaire to fill in about myself and it really gave me an insight into what's going on with my body i.e. I am in quite good health but if I keep loading in the sugar and fat as I do, in ten years time my health is probably going to be pretty rubbish. So she suggest I start on Chromium, which apparently controls sugar cravings, and this weekend she is going to write up a 'script' for me. Feeling quite excited really!

Hope you all have good weekends...

I have now properly read the end of katie's last post - teach me for skim reading - and I agree that having compassion for people and holding them in your heart as you meditate is important. As part of my depression I believe that I lost a lot of compassion and sympathy for people and am only now gaining it back as I start to have compassion for myself (a big deal for me). It makes me able to communicate and empathise with people going through a rough time a lot better and I hope this helps them.

I guess in a bit of a selfish way it also makes me thankful for what I have, and that in turn helps with the low moods.

louie that is exactly what i meant, and do you remember how guru sarah(!) talks about the first step in expanding your capacity for compassion for others is having compassion for yourself first? surely such sensible advice. so i am really glad you are finding it within you to do that. if there is an upside to suffering, including depression (and there most certainly has to be, or what else is this life all about) then this must be it - an increased capacity for empathy and compassion for ourselves and for others
if only i could remember this all the time eh

hello my friends

louie lovely to hear from you again, and sounding so positive - good for you. AM glad to hear your meditation is going strong, mindful running, now there is a challenge! and the naturalist sounds as though sh ecould really help. I am finally finding that my chronic headaches are really lessening, after 6 or 7 weeks of a changed diet...so stick it out...the fwbo is the friends of the western buddhist order they have centres all over and then little groups like my own which are a bit itinerant and don't have their own centre but meet regularly in rented public spaces...I like them, my group are lovely anyway - we do mediation etc and chat . It really has helped me. this is a list of all the FWBO centres in the UK

here is a link to whatthe london buddhist centre is doing on sunday I got an email from one of th emonks in my sangha yesterday recommending the talk by subhuthi which I might try to get along to...

in the meantime, thanks all for the vibes for my friend, I agree about the compassion meditating, was just reading Thich Nhat on the subject on the bus this morning indeed. I will make some time this evening after kids in bed to do it. I know it will make me feel better, but what it will actually do for him in this moment I am not sure. But that is not the correct approach. That is the "cynical" approach that does none of our spirits much good...

Am also getting stuck into my psychotheraphy without the self book in advance of my first session next week (tremble tremble) - it's very interesting so far...

peanut, thanks for the FWBO list of centres, that was very thoughtful of you - as a result i have made contact with the worcester one (it was a bit galling seeing that every city i have ever lived in has a thriving buddhist centre - made me slightly curse the fact that i waited until living in the arse-end of nowhere until developing this interest, grrr!) and hope to go along to one of their tuesday evening groups sometime soon - it's about an hour's drive from here, but i figure that even if i just make it every month or so (DH/childcare permitting, of course!) then that would be helpful. plus i might go on a one-day so-called urban retreat at the end of june as a mini-practice for our september weekend
when do we get to change our names to something suitably mysterious and eastern by the way - DH will really love that . i seem to recall sarah n. firmly stating that it Wasn't Necessary, come to think of it!!

hi all

katie - great to hear the list of fwbo centres proved useful - I should think once a month will still be great and if you like the group you might even choose to go more often. I am going to do soemthing on that urban retreat weekend too - so we can be virtually on retreat together

well, I went to the pyschotherapy assessment today - it was interesting. Kind of strange to find myself in a situation where I was expected to engage with my ishooes when I have spent the best part of the last two months ignoring them and focussing on the now, and "just be"ing ...anyway, the consultant reckoned I am a good candidate for the treatment but then went to to suggest I might want to do it off the NHS as a)I might get seem quicker b) it might be more flexible a treatment plan, ie evenings and holidays to coincide with school holidays...is it me or was that a bit weird? she said the NHS waiting list is about 6 months at present which would bring me to November ...that is a long time, but in the greater scheme of things (ie my life to date!) not so bad...am wondering is there some kind of agenda of trying to persaude people off the waiting lists to shorten them??? am I just being cynical. Apparantly I would get about 10-12 months treatment on the NHS and she said if I wanted to continue after that it would be a problem. Mind you, continuing private therapy at £50 a weekly pop would be a bit of an issue too...

before the appointment I was quite wound up and went to a local cafe and to sit. I read some bits from "peace is every step" by Thich Nhat Hanh, there is a lovely passage where he is talking about conciousness of the breath that i thought I should share with you, he recommends reciting these 4 lines silently as we breather in, then out, then in , then out again

Breathing in, I calm my body.
Breathing out, I smile.
Dwelling in the present moment,
I know this is a wonderful moment.

this can be abridged to "Calming, Smiling, Present moment, Wonder" when doing a consciousness of breath meditation, or sitting,anywhere, for any length of time...

have a good day friends

peanut and all of you lovely girls,

hello xxx i use that little mantra of TNH's a lot, and find it really helpful. i often start off my meditations with it, in fact. by the way i find 'peace is every step' by far my favourite of his books so far - i am loving it. i just pick it up now and again and read one of two of the short wise chapters and feel instantly calmed!

i got through saturday with surprising calm and had an exceptionally lovely meditation in the evening. so i felt suitably grateful for having found this 'path' and for what it is bringing to me, most especially during the hard times. thanks for the positive vibes girls, certainly something helped me through the day !

now, back to the serious business of ishoos and therapy peanut. i would be very wary about signing up for over a year's worth of any of this. (this from someone who just did!! i dread to think how much it cost me)...if you are considering going private, i would think about contacting a 'human givens' practitioner. do you remember me banging on about this before (some months ago now)? they are common sensical, focussed on the NOW (and we are now signed up to The Now, non?!) and do not spend month after expensive month stirring up the past when there is quite possibly no need/when it might even be counter-productive. a few sessions is all that is needed usually. if you decide to access psychotherapy on the NHS then by all means go for it, since at least it will be free, if you don't mind waiting 6 months - but if you choose to go private you have to bear in mind that it is indeed totally in their interests to keep you going back for as long as possible. a friend of mine in NYC has been going 3 times a week for 15 YEARS, and she is completely dependent on her therapist. not only that but her tendency to over-think and over-analyse constantly has been massively reinforced.

btw of course you were told you were a great candidate - you are an intelligent and insightful woman. you are indeed a great candidate for that version of therapy - but that does not mean that they are a great candidate for YOU.

i will talk to you some more on your msp address in fact! but must dash to get kids now xxx

thanks Katie - my email and your post crossed!

yes, I am concerned about buying into a long term money sapping activity that will make me even more over-analytical etc. TBH that is just exhausting. I find the mindful approach so much better for me, but wonder whether it's actually the drugs. I don't know. I probably need to start thinking of getting off th emeds at some stage though and lord knows what kind of state I'd find myself in then. Thanks v much for the human givens reminder - will check them out

yes, am loving peace is every step...indeed (and you are going to be so jealous Katie so I AM sorry, but I need to post it here in case anyone else reading is in London and can get to this) in the international buddhist film festival currently on at the barbican they are showing this documentary on our dear TNH...I am hoping against hope DH won't be teaching ...

off to attend to something I haven't gotten around to for about a month now...hoping to finally attend and get it done tonight

justa - welcome back!!! how was mallorca? we are going in july. have only been once, to the soller area, years ago now, but loved it. did you get to r-e-l-a-x? lol at your chat with your spirichool director

oooh, positive vibes justa - you'll be top of list in my metta bhavana tonight and every night til Monday

must run but am thinking of you

Hi Everyone, This is written in haste (just before school run chaos) so excuse the brief nature of it.
Welcome back Justa - fingers crossed for Monday.
Katie - so relieved Saturday went well for you - I was thinking of you- positive vibes were sent your way.
PB - have been thinking a lot about your dilemma about whether to go with the NHS / private. Perhaps just wait for the NHS appointment and in the meantime concentrate on your meditation. (At least it's free).
DId anyone hear the interview this morning on Today prog with French Buddhist monk Matthieu Ricard - who according to new research is apparently the happiest man in the world!
I guess you can listen to the interview on BBC Radio 4's Today website (listen again facility). Or if you follow this link there's a long interview with him: www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/buddhism/customs/meditation_4.shtml

Matthieu Ricard has written a book called Happiness - it's in my big pile of unread books! .
Have a lovely day -

Just found this weblink on BBC website:
www.wildmind.org
It has online meditation courses and lots of resources....Have only had a quick look but it may be of interest...

Ok back to RL and doing a mindful school run.

fluffy - you're a sweetheart for sending thoughts my way on saturday, i'm very touched. thanks a lot for that link and the matthieu r. reference - will check all of that out later!
justa - you're in all our hearts. i hope things are going well for you this week.
saffy, was it you who recommended 'the power of now'? or was it you, pinkfluffy? anyway i am halfway through it and it's really thought-provoking. will summarise my thoughts on it when i finish it!
big hugs, must make a start here at work - my employers (the GPs i locum for) are interviewing for a new partner today, so the place is swarming with anxious prospective candidates, i am trying my hardest to be a calming presence when i bump into them in the corridor and send them soothing vibes as they sit, sweating, in their too-tight suits waiting for the day of torture to begin!!

Hi Everyone
I wonder if anyone can help with this question / problem I have... Forgive me for posting in this section but I feel that I'm amongst friends here.

The question is simple: I would like a hobby but I don't know where to start. DH (of 18 months) says I'm always starting things but never following them through and TBH I think he's right. (He says my interest in Buddhism is just the latest "fad"). I have a lot of general knowledge but no great burning passion/ knowledge of a subject, apart from my DD - which doesn't count. To make the problem worse I work with academics who all obviously have great knowledge of their specialist field so this makes me feel rather inadequate.

Before I had DD I never really stuck at things, now I have DD I can never find time / babysitter.

So the question is: how do I find a hobby and most importantly how do I stick to it.

Thank you.

Forgot to ask - what did people do for Buddha Day?
PB did you go to the "do" in London?
BTW PB thank you for recommending the LBC website, I've been listening to an interesting talk on their audio section.

fluffy - i just got home with a smile on my face from my weekly sing with my community choir...are you any sort of singer? i am an entirely mediocre tenor (basically a bloke!!) but have managed to find a choir so large and so laid-back that this is no barrier, amazingly...worth a thought?
first things first - are you in need of a group thing or a solitary pursuit?
sticking to something might be easier if there is a group dynamic to support (i feel guilty about missing choir or yoga because of the people there, in part)? and if it's geographically close to you, and has meaning for you.
give us some more clues and i will willingly get my thinking cap on for you!

justa - LOL at the thought of being perceived as remotely grown-up - surely you know that i bluff my way through my working day (as do so many of us so-called adults!)?!

Hi all, lovely to catch up with the thread, as ever.

Rev - lots of positive thoughts coming your way, I'll be thinking of you especially on Monday

Peanut - honestly, a 6 month waiting period sounds like the perfect opportunity to look into the human givens stuff, or CBT, or any other 'now-focused' therapy, while knowing you do have the psychotherapy coming up if nothing else fits.

Pink fluffy - am useless at hobbies so will leave you in katie's capable hands. Although I do enjoy yoga in a group, maybe clear appointments and commitment to other people will make it easier to stick to? Am I just repeating what katie said?

I'm ashamed to say that, living in this Buddhist country where Visakha Bucha day is a national holiday, I spent it working. The closest I got to meditation was sneaking out for a coffee next door to a temple and listening to the gongs and chanting. It made for a very nice coffee though

Hi
Thanks for your input into my hobbies question, it actually got me thinking about what it is I want to do. And as if by fate this weekend I've had time to think.... usually weekends are spent rushing around but due to sick DD I've had time out from my usual whirlwind. It's been great !

I won't ramble on but I think if I can stop and just "be" a bit more then that would give me more head space for hobbies. (Yoga once a week, hopefully a meditation class occasionally and possibly do some art....) Katie I like your idea of joining a community choir - so will think about it. I think its a question of better time management on my part and putting myself first (before the housework!)

Mangolassi I like the idea of sitting in a cafe listening to the noises from the temple - that sounds v restful. I meditated the other evening with the lights out in the room but had some lights on in our tiny courtyard garden - it was lovely.

Justa - shall be thinking of you tomorrow.

Toodlepip