Does anyone have a daily meditation practice? Would anyone like one but needs motivation?

[mangolassi]

Ooh, I feel all shy

I am agnostic and generally confused about spiritual things, but after recovering from a bout of pnd found a great book - The Mindful Way Through Depression. It has a programme of daily meditation, and I've tried in the past, but it's soooo hard to stick to with no support.

The meditation style in the book is 'western insight' - basically vipassana with the Buddhism taken out - but it would be great to have a thread for anyone trying to get started with daily practice, whatever kind of meditation appeals. Even better if there's anyone who actually has a daily practice already

Hi, I've just dipped in to see what's been happening since I last looked.
Madhouse, sorry to hear about the forthcoming op, I hope all goes well. Re: suggestions for your ipod I know
www. buddhet.net has an audio section including meditation instruction and buddhist chanting.. (Don't know if you can download from website though) I've now idea what it's like but it might help?
The buddhanet website is recommended in the book Buddhism for Mothers.... which I discovered on this thread. (A FABULOUS book - I can't recommend it highly enough)
All well here - I'm reading lots on meditation, trying to practice and thanks to this thread I've searched out a local meditation class which starts in a couple of weeks. So a big mindfulness thank you!!

hello again

mangolassi - - of course you mentioned that mindful depression book, and only in your, ahem, very first post. Indeed that must have been how I found out about it. (I've been lurking here a while and so must have forgotten). I read it again today on the bus to work. I'm planning to read it all through once and then stare the 8 week programme once I have done that. I am giving lots of the things they talk about a little try along the way though.

I'm normally such a rushing person, I've realised I never stand straight on towards anything - literally I am always at an angle as though I am already on my way somewhere else. I am trying to be more concious of it and just be straight onto things, like washing my hands, loading the dishwasher/washing machine etc. Today my main thing was to try to be mindful when I washed my hands. I quite like washing my hands, but I always do it at an angle, in a rush, under stress (whyohwhyohwhy?) so today I made it different. I even bought some nice organic liquid soap for our bathroom at home which I hope will remind me to take my time and enjoy the activity, well, be present in it at least.

I'm finding it very difficult at work at the moment though (am I allowed to say this here? it's not really about meditation per se and so if you'd prefer this thread stay kind of light and generally positive please (PLEASE) let me know) I'm in a bit of a state of emotional turmoil, not sure if am in a depressive state or am just overwhelmed by all this new stuff (well, I know there is a bit of that going on - I cried last night when my daughter put on her new little lava lamp in the dark for the first time and I saw all the bubbles on the walls - she wondered what the heck was up with me - it just all seemed too much, although I loved it - does that make any sense?)Anyway, the last number of years (even before being diagnosed as "depressed") I've had trouble concentrating in my job. In the last two years it has been significantly worse, to teh stage where I now sometimes spend days on end just surfing the web and not doing what I am supposed to be doing. It's awful. Today I really tried to keep bringing myself back to the task at hand but every ten minutes I would be off somewhere else. I work on a computer pretty much all the time so it's very easy to just drift off. I am not actually interested in my job really, it stresses me in a way I can't explain and doesn't stimulate me intellectually or creatively so I find myself surfing off in the things that do. Today I was looking at lots of meditation sites. Does anyone have any ideas on what I can do to make this better? It's making me feel very guilty. And I am obviously not getting my job done well, although I manage just about to keep things hanging together badly it gets very stressful when the management team start interrogating me on things I should know/have done. This is the first time I have ever admited to anyone but myself that I do this

I went out at lunchtime and thought I had hit upon just what I needed. I found innerspace in covent garden. I bought a meditation cd for my daughter (aged 6 and well on her way to being as neurotic as me - one of the overwhelming reasons I need to change asap!) and got talking to a woman there about meditation classes etc. She directed me downstairs to their "quiet room" where she said I could just go and sit. I did - it was wonderful. When I came upstairs again I noticed they are part of the brahma kumaris world spiritual university which when i googled back in the office (ahem) I found all sorts of worrying things written about. That kind of threw me, I read about them "targetting" vulnerable people and I felt that that so easily could have been me...I am in such a questing place at the moment and depressed too probably.

gosh, I am sorry for this long ramble, stream of consciousness, whatever - you will all wish I would go back to lurking! please do tell me if this is not the place for such "unburdening" - you all just seem so supportive and lovely and so many of you seem to have been through similar that I suppose I hope you might have some insights

right, will head off and do something non-introspective for a while I think

ps katieK - I wish I lived near you - I'd be round for meditation like a shot

peanut,

sorry you're finding things so hard.

I had fairly severe pnd after dd was born, so I do know where you're coming from. Ads were a lifesaver (possibly literally) for me and I've found meditation and yoga really helpful as I've recovered. I can only speak for myself, but i think this is a fine place for unburdening. (But you know that mn disclaimer at the top of the 'mental health' threads? That applies here too - you'll get lots of tea and sympathy, but not professional help. Are you seeing anyone/ doing anything about your depression? Is it working for you?)

Let me know when you're ready to try the 8-week course and I'll start with you, I'd love to give it another go. I found the body scan pretty much impossible but couldn't work out why.

Work - actually, when I came back to work after dd was born - way too early - I got into a hugely vicious circle of resentment at being there -> internet instead of work -> crippling guilt at being useless -> resentment at feeling bad -> even less productive...
I think it's part of depression that you can see what would make you feel better, but can't seem to do it. What about this:

1. Set a timer. (I do this for housework, recently realised it works for things like the annual report as well). You probabl have a timer on your mobile. 30 minutes on task and then go and get a cup of tea, look at email, whatever. If 30 mins is too hard, then try 10.

1. Unplug the cable that connects you to the internet until the 30 mins are up. (If you have wireless, can you disable it?)

1. Think about what time of day is easiest to work, what time is hardest, and try to work with it (e.g. for me, first thing in the morning I can be pretty productive, straight after lunch I'm useless. So first thing I unplug the internet cable and do the hardcore thinking work. I just got back from lunch now...)

1. Try to skip the bit where you beat yourself up. Your goal is to be a bit more productive and the constant negative thoughts aren't helping.

(If I could take my own advice there, I probably wouldn't need to meditate in the first place )

I don't know anything about Brahma Kumaris, maybe someone else will. I hope this doesn't come across as too confrontational (it's hard to do tones on a forum), but what struck me about what you wrote was that your emotional reactions seemed very strong - both at first:
"thought I had hit upon just what I needed"
and then later:
"That kind of threw me, I read about them "targetting" vulnerable people and I felt that that so easily could have been me..."

I think it's unlikely that a meditation centre is either going to be a magic cure or, what's the opposite of a magic cure?

Perspective can be hard sometimes, I know.

God, this post is as long as yours now Keep posting, keep meditating

Louie - hi! Were you waiting for a namecheck? Sorry about sickness. One day I'll make it to India, it's not even that far away for me...

thanks so much mangolassi for your thoughtful post

I am just here for a moment - my timer beeper has gone off and I am enjoying a slice of panetonne, a cup of good coffee and a chance to look here quickly

will come back later when have more time and respond properly to your very helpful post

have a good day everyone

peanut, just read you and mango just now at a thousand miles/minute... of course you are welcome to offload and we are interested and concerned. in your position i would pick a fairly non-denominational meditation course, or one with good buddhist credentials, bcs as you yourself say, you are a SUCKER for the less authentic outfits around in your present state (might as well be frank - have been there myself and so i know - any cult around could have had me at one stage!). you're in a state of chronic emotional over-arousal which is draining you and which is why you're welling up at the sight of the bubble patterns from a lava lamp. (i've been there too - as a gp i knew things were bad when i started crying with patients over their troubles, even fairly minor ones - empathy, tick; effectiveness as a counsellor, nul points!!)
the 'human givens' approach would be to see what needs, here in the present, are being met and which are not. and then tackle them - but i know that's hard when you're in a frame of mind when it's a massive effort just to put the kettle on. do think about seeing someone. i'd suggest a HG counsellor but that's bcs i'm in their cult at the moment

thanks katieK

yes, I have come to conclusion I do need a non-denominational meditation course or nice friendly buddhist one. There is a western friends of buddishm "chapter" near me but I can't do the nights they meet - have enquired by email about some others

thanks for understanding about the blardy lava lamp - I found it quite upsetting to find myself in such a state in front of the kids, at some bubbles on the wall! I seem to be so highly strung and tightly wound up at the moment it is just not funny.

Still, each moment as it comes eh. Have some friends coming around for tea and knitting later so that will be very nice. I can always seem to motivate myself to put on the kettle for a cup of tea somehow

MangoL to come back to your points - yes, it did seem rather emotionally charged what i said. I was rushing toward the end of that interminable post! when I said "I thought I'd found what I needed" I meant a meditation class that I could do on Mondays at lunchtime - the time I have availabel is very erratic, my DH works some evenings so those are out, and I work very early mornings and then quit to pick kids up from school early. So lunchtimes, apart from Monday are out too (as I don't normally take a lunch-hour) but the bit about being an easy target still rings true, I do feel very vulnerable at the mo, and could easily be sucked into anything that seemed warm, comforting, supportive etc etc etc (bit likewhat's happened with this thread )

no, buddhism is the way for me, or no strings attached meditation, at least you knid of know where you are with those. Now just have to find somewhere to learn a bit.

Will definately let you know when I am ready for the 8 week thing - would be lovely to have someone on the journey with me.

I am trying to get appt with GP for tomorrow - we talked about me maybe getting some psychodynamic therapy before xmas and I've been thinking it over and think I am going to go ahead with it. I will ask about human givens too but don't know if can get that on NHS?

anyway, thanks again. you lot are fantastic. I wish you all luck with your meditating and other pursuits and will check in again soon (hopefully not to ramble so interminably next time!)

X

ps mangoL - meant to say - I set my phone for 30 mins repeatedly today and it REALLY helped. Is amazing how small things like that (and possibly admitting on here that this is going on) helps

but am taking every day as it comes - was a relatively stressfree day at work too which helped

Mango - yes it is nice to know someone is thinking about me

In India I picked up "The Art of Happiness" written by Howard Cutler and the Dalai Lama and although I have only read a few pages some points are really standing out for me.

The first is the difference between pleasure and happiness, and how pleasure can be both helpful and destructive but that it is definitely not the same as happiness. Something I hadn't really thought of before.

It also explains how the more we strive for wordly things the more unhappy we become, and that only by being happy and grateful for what we already have will we achieve happiness.

And finally it gives a good meditation practice - and this is just in the first section so I am looking forward to reading the rest.

And last night I did the setting a timer for the housework too - it was great to just leave everything and do something for myself - I went for a run and had a bath. Hopefully this year will continue in a similar way.

am posting just to keep this in my active conversations

I've got "Buddhism for mothers" now too, to add to my arsenal of buddhist tomes. Makes a lot of sense. I find this buddhism stuff amazing, so much of it is so simple, but so powerful, even for some one like me who is just dipping in when I can right now. It feels so powerful when an "unhelpful" thought comes to just acknowledge it and know that I don't have to do any more. It's so freeing to just let it bubble and burst. Although I am finding it hard not to label thoughts/emotions as "unpleasant" or whatever. Still, at least am aware i am doing it. MangoL am not ready yet to start the 8 week practice, but should be soon...

hope you are all well and have a good week

peanut - sounds great. really positive.
had my first meditation group today, at mine - was absolutely wonderful. 6 people turned up and we all took turns talking about why and how we had come to meditation. all sorts came out - one person's former alcoholism for instance, experiences of religion, of retreats, and general philosophies of the greater questions of life! because most of them i had recruited(!) through the quaker group i've started attending, there was a real collection of wisdom and experience in the room - and when we finally did get around to a group meditation, the effect was amazing - it enhanced my meditation so much that i was astonished. i had not expected it. so am really pleased, and feel very grateful so many people made the effort to come. we are meeting again next week! will keep you posted xxx

Hello...it is lovely catching up.

Have had a trying start to the year, and I find when I most need to meditate is when I am too stressed to remember.
I should come on here more to prompt me. My box is lovely and I do add to it regularly and it has quite a adifferent feel to a 'shrine', which I like.

I suppose the most I am doing is walking meditation at the moment, as I am struggling to run, but it is very enriching in itself, and the walk I do is showing vibrant signs of spring coming. Maybe it is symbollic of my return to health.

Re the standing up straight issue, I found the Alexander technique invaluable and also changed the way I do things in general. A few seconds added to a task can change the result from being acceptable, to something quite special.

Oh I really must keep up on here. I feel a little boosted already

katiek - congratulations - your group sounds like it went really well, and how nice to get an unexpected extra meditative "surge"...well done for getting it together

am interested in the quaker thing - there is a quaker meeting room near where I work that I thought might be nice to go and sit in some lunchtimes - the website says you don't have to be a practising quaker (I'm not a practising anything at the mo, but am getting very interested in buddhism as you know) and teh thought of sitting in silence every now and then really appeals...

twf - welcome back. this is a great thread. I am so glad to have found it. I've become so conscious of the "straight on" thing now. Even at the bus stop this morning I was standing facing one way with my head turned another in order to see if the bus was coming. I changed my position and then did some short breathing consciousness for a couple of seconds...made the fact that I was running late much easier to bear

I saw some crocuses (or some sort of spring shoots, am useless with plants) poking through the ground at the weekend too, lovely to see...

must go back and read about your box again twf - sounds very interesting

have a happy day everyone

hi twf, hi peanut. twf - sorry the year's started in a tricky way for you - hope things improve. peanut, do go to the quakers one of these days to see how you find it - i go simply because there happens to be a meeting house in my village and i was curious - i enjoyed it so much i've just kept on going, and i have met the most inspiring people through it. there is something so powerful and healing about sitting in silence! i am an 'attender' (ie hanger-on) rather than a member and retain a big interest in buddhism too - there is no problem being interested in both, i have found.
in fact, the only problem i am finding through all of this is that DH is not remotedly interested in matters of the spirit(!) and is getting a bit tetchy with my leanings in this direction, sigh - don't quite know how to deal with that. will ponder...
have a happy day back peanut, and all girls x

Hello

Sorry if this isn't the right place, but I have some questions about meditation and I wonder if any of you might be able to help.

My partner is considering doing a ten day mediation retreat, it's called Dhamma Dipa. You can't talk at all for the ten days, there's daily instruction on meditation. He has never done meditation before, but he's been very ill with depression for a while, and as he's struggling, he thinks this may be a positive thing, he's not expecting it to change his life, but maybe give him another tool for coping.

Has anyone used mediation in this way? Part of me worries that ten days isolation and silence will actually drive him mad, and I'm slightly nervous, although pleased he's willing to give something so positive a try.

I have limited experience of meditation, my dad was very interested in it when i was growing up and i learned at mentmore towers when i was about six, but i've never done it in such an intense way.

Thank you for any advice

They seem to be quite thorough in the application process with regards to mental health, which is reassuring - so I guess they make sure they are aware of any issues.

It doesn't seem to be specifically Buddhist, it's as mango said, vipassana with the Buddhism taken out. Self reflection and focusing on breathing. I'm hoping that it will be very positive, but seems like a risk as well.

Well, they would be aware of it - they will be - he's not sent it yet, we're still staring at it and deciding. I don't want to put him off, but don't want to encourage him into something that could possibly be a difficult experience.

How do you meditate if you've not done it before? For me it's different, but I learned walking meditation, it was a ritual and I was 'given' a mantra.

Are there any books or websites particularly useful for learning basics?

boco - am not an experienced buddhist or anything like that but I suffer depression too and have found (as have others on this thread) this book to be enormously helpful - it's based on the premise that mindfullness and meditation can help us recognise depressive thoughts for what they are, and hopefully let them go...it has a CD to help guide the beginner meditator too and an 8 week programme. I haven't tried that yet but mangolassi and I plan to get started at some point

maybe he could give that a go first...

ps katieK - my partner isn't interested either, at all. But is happy enough for me to do what I need, at the moment at least as all it involves is reading a few books and beng a bit calmer...interesting times ahead perhaps. Though I noted with interest that the buddhist mother auther mentions a couple of times that her husband is very "un-spiritual"...I hope you find the support you need

Thank you PB, that looks excellent, have put it in my Amazon basket and will show dp tonight.

peanut thanks for the book recommendation from my side, I will order that one soon i.e. when I get paid

justabout I was thinking about you yesterday and hoping that all the stuff that happened hadn't driven you away for good - nice to see you back!

The past week has been very interesting for me, I have found out I have something called dysthymia which is a chronic mild depression, and it has unfortunately been in my life for more than 10 years. I wish I hadn't taken this long to do something about it. Anyway one of the characteristics of this illness is an inability to concentrate, I think this is why I am finding it so hard to meditate, at least now I can stop blaming myself so much. Also another thing that happens is that you neglect yourself to sometimes a profound extent, and that is something that I have been doing and which I am striving to change.

One of the things that has kept me going though is this thread, thank you fellow MNers for sharing your thought and experiences!