Pointless Poll- If you are Catholic, do you use contraception?

[ofhippo]

Just being nosy.

to be fair, a lot of catholics (including some progressive priests) ignore some of the more insane teachings. for instance my dad still considers himself a very devout catholic but had the snip, doesn't go to confession, didn't send us to a catholic school because he had a bad experience with the jesuits...it seems to me that while other faiths have many different churches and schools of thought, catholics are catholics are catholics, but within that, a lot is left down to the individual's conscience and interpretation of the rules. most catholics i know regard the vatican's barmy dictates as something to be taken with a skip of salt...

A religious pick-and-mix? Just choose the bits you like and agree with and ignore the other bits? How does that work then?

From what I can kinda remember from history classes, the ban on contraception came about from the Early Church Fathers. During this time, those in charge had a clear vision of the goals of the Church.

Contraception was "banned" because they wanted lots of little Catholics running around: there was threat from other religions.

The thing that has always stuck in my mind is that these decisions were made by old men who - in some cases - had done ALOT of shagging around!!! This "rule" was created on the basis of someone's OPINION. Don't forget, this was during a time when people would "leave their babies to the elements" if they couldn't feed them, or if they didn't look "normal".

I think the no contraception thing has gotten blown out of proportion.

If you follow it to the letter, then you should NEVER have sex for enjoyment, and never when you cannot conceive.

no we don't, only because the pill has serious side effects on me, DH doesn't like condoms and we don't want to use anything other.

i don't particularly agree with the 'pick'n'mix' approach myself - one of the reasons i rejected the whole kit and caboodle. but most followers of religion do this to some extent - you'd be hard pushed to find anyone who follows every stricture of their religion to the letter...

I agree hellsbells, it's just something I don't get. It also puzzles me why some things are acceptable things to overlook in any particular religion and why others re not.

"If you follow it to the letter, then you should NEVER have sex for enjoyment, and never when you cannot conceive."

Absolute nonsense. The Church is very pro-sex (within marriage) and teaches that it is very much an important and enjoyable part of married life. If a couple want to avoid conception they are encouraged to use NFP methods but they should be prepared for the consequences if the method fails.

Although I don't condemn or judge people who take a "pick and mix" approach to religion, it's not a thought process I understand - I do agree with the church's teaching on family life and I have no qualms about other thorny issues. That's not to say that I accept blindly or that I haven't struggled with or thought about such issues but I think that to be a practising Catholic means accepting all the teachings of the Church, and not rejecting those that I find difficult to follow. Faith is meant to be a daily struggle against the evil influences in our society and our lives - it's not easy.

In my experience the church is very pro sex.

Re the pick and mix aspect, you cannot believe something that you do not believe. St Thomas Aquinas said it was better to perish in excommunication rather than violate your conscience. Vatican 2 said that nobody can be constrained to share a conviction that is not his or her own.

I don't think that the view that the church is totalitarian regime that doesn't allow Catholics to think for themselves is reasonable. It would be wrong, imo, to follow a teaching which went against what you believed to be right. Of course, just because you think something is right or wrong doesn't mean you are correct and just because something is taught by the church you shouldn't just say 'the church says so therefore it must be true' any more than you should say 'bunch of mysogenous bastards, what do they know' in a knee jerk type way. You must think for yourself and try to find the objective truth.

Yes (although am pg at the mo)

Of course, the no-contraception belief isn't confined to Catholics, there's a whole protestant movement, too.

Limbo HAS been declared invalid by the new pope. Now isn't that interesting: you can't pick and mix, but somehow the Church can (well, the Pope anyway). I think not picking at all is ridiculous: God has given you a conscience and rationality! The church has been wrong in many instances, historically.

I am a catholic who takes the contraceptive pill as a cure for painful periods. My priest said this is OK as the reason for taking the pill is for a cure for painful periods and the fact that it stops you getting pregnant is a side effect.

aye, the 'double effect' principle.

I was and I did.

I always wanted to ask this, but didn't want to offend anyone. For catholics isn't this business of timing sex so as to avoid pregnancy an attempt at outwitting god?

Now I know someone will say that you can't outwit god, but that's the intent surely? If catholics really believed it was up to god when they had children surely they wouldn't make any effort at all to avoid them.

AIUI, yes, but one that is "allowed" because it leaves the possibility open. Although that doesn't make any sense to me either, thinking about it, since as I posted above, the high efficacy rate of "proper" NFP ought to mean that it is more effective than barrier or whatever-you-call-the-pill methods. So in fact one could argue that by using NFP, one is actually being less open to the idea of children. hmm.

Bizarre coincidence - am currently (theoretically) cleaning the house in anticipation of family descending tomorrow and have discovered under the computer cabinet a February issue of the Tablet whose cover story is 'Timothy Radcliffe on the gift of ourselves through sexual love'. Shall read and report back... unless anyone else has already read it!

A wise priest once pointed out to me that God gave us all free will...

It's up to one's conscience whether to take the rules on face value and up to you if you ever regret your decisions and decide to repent and seek the sacrament of reconciliation (confession).

I am Catholic and do use contraception, though I disagreed with abortion before I became a Catholic, fwiw.

I'm genuinely quite shocked that people discuss this issue with their priest. Contraception wasn't even mentioned in our marriage preparation and I'm sure my parish priest would assume that such issues are between you and your husband.

Why be shocked? People discuss all sorts of issues with their priests, especially if they're seeking help and advice on something. I suppose it depends on how well you know him and the how approachable you find him (depending on the issue at hand).

Contraception was discussed in our marriage preparation - without going into the psecific details of the types of methods we could use. The priest covered the reasons behind the position on contraception/conception/sex etc in order that we fully understood what we were signing up to. This was done as part of a group course and I'm sure he was aware that some of the couples present would probably use "illegal" contraception at some point - he was merely pointing out the Church's position and then leaving it up to us to make up our minds.

Well, there are catholics who reject even NFP and charting methods for exactly the reasons you suggest, Greyriverside.

my dad and sister's husband are both practising Catholics who have had vasectomies.

my mum told me she once asked her priest if it was ok to sleep with her boyfriend. he said 'fine, as long as all you do is sleep...'

not shocked that you would talk about sex and stuff with your priest - we are very close to ours (he is DS3's god father) but I just think that there are many many more important things to talk about with him.

At our marriage course, he did point out that since all of us lived with our then fiances, it was a bit odd to have your Dad "give you away" at the wedding - he's not averse to talking aout such things at all but I genuinely don't think he would think it was any of his business

i tell my priest everything - it's called confession

Hang on - quick question
My husband and I are unable (and I mean COMPLETELY unable) to have children together. Therefore in our case sex is separated from procreation, thereby trivialising it and making it wrong. Have I got that right?