Help needed with non-christian child

[ladyfish]

My husband and I have been Christians for a long time and our children were dedicated in a Baptist church. Ds is now 29 and attends a Baptist church with his wife(not baptised, non-members), dd (24) was baptised at 16 but turned against it almost immediately and now says that "throwing that crutch away was the the hardest thing I ever did". She married a man of 32 and has just had a baby...or just not, the last I heard was that she was having an epidural and it probably has been just born and they have not had a chance to tell us yet.
He is into solstices and the like, don't understand any of it, he was at a navy boarding school and was very put of by the compulsion to attend services etc.
I find it so hard to cope with, knowing that they have this new baby and they will not even thank God for it. They don't believe God has any interest in what happens to them, anybody in the same position?

Once again, thank you all for your messages. To those I offended, sorry I spoke, I hadn't realised I laid myself wide open to being thought arrogant in believing that Christianithy is just the best thing to have in your life, but I should have done.
Flamingitms, I am quite curious to know what your mother said; of all the people who have posted she is the only one who had(s) the same experience:- a child rejecting what is precious in her life.
Edam, loved the story about your grandmother.
Morningpaper,you are so right. I love the idea of the champagne, but wonder how it would go down in our Baptist church.
The idea that I would be the last to know if she has gone back to anything she knew as a Christian is just an eye opener, this will be the last bastion of her rebellion, more difficult because of dh's approach. I know he is irritated, like a number of you in the posts, more so because he knows there is nothing to stop us praying, although he probably wishes we wouldn't, I don't know, I find it hard to talk to him

he got the raping kids in again didn't you DC. your vile.

i think you should thank god for the blessing bestowed on your daughter and yourself.

i can understand how it must hurt to know that your grandchild isn't being brought up in your faith.

but then thats an expression of the greatest gift god gave us. free will.

Ladyfish - congratulations on the birth of your grandchild.

I was brought up in the Methodist church. My Mum ran young wives, my Gandfather was a lay minister, we went to Sunday school, all the social events, everything.

I am not now a Christian, in that I am an athiest, and have no faith in god. BUT I do think all my values are very much based in the conversations I had with my grandfather from a very young age, and the wider philosophy of Chritianity.

They never pressurised me to follow the church: the whole approach was that everything we do, we are accountable to our conscience. Including church membership or belief in god. All was presented in 'make your own decision about everything you do - but know why you do it and accept responsibility for it'.

I am sure you have brought your dd up with strong values - be proud of her...but do not feel sad for her. She will have her own strengths and sources of reflection to live her life with the values she learned at home with you. If you feel sad for her, you are, by implication, saying that you are disappoiunted in her, or only your faith and choices wil be the right ones.

I think it must be hard to have an absolute faith and to see your dd not continuing in that faith, but in allowing me to make my own choices, without pressure, implied criticism or 'sadness' on my behalf for my choices, my family ensured that, in fact, I have complete respect for their choices, I am grateful for what it gave me, and I hope that if my grandparents are watching from the heaven they believed in, they will be proud of me, not sad - as I am for the lives they led.

Good luck - I hope you are able to enjoy your grandchild without awkwardness in the family.

Ladyfish, my experience is that champagne goes down very well in a Baptist church... as long as you have a crate of Schloer for the more restrained members of the congregation...

Hi OP,

As an atheist, I know that very religious people often feel sad for me and that there is a huge gaping hole in my life. Because if they didn't have their faith there would be a huge gaping hole in their lives.

It doesnt make it true for me though, or your daughter. Any more than there is a sad, gaping hole in your life because you don't follow Hinduism or Islam, unlike the millions of people who do.

Pray if you like, but keep it to yourself. It is extremely irritating when people pray for me. Would you like a Hindu feeling sorry for you and praying that you join their religion? Its disrespectful of another person's beliefs.
I think you are taking this too personally. A rejection of your faith is not a rejection of you. It's not 'rebelling', she is an adult who is fully entitled to make her own decisions about religion.

OP don't put barriers up in your family.

You are in great danger of creatig problems where none exist.

If they're happy without religion, what's the problem? If she was baptised and then immediately 'abandoned' it, them I'm guessing she wasn't that into it in the first place. It can be hard for a 16 year old to go against their parents.

This is a 3 year old Zombie thread. I doubt the OP is going to see any replies.

13! Sausage fingers.