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The journey through emotion

26 replies

papillon · 09/05/2004 09:17

Hello everyone and welcome

This space is for everybody.

It is a place for communal sharing and support;
a place to talk about conventional and holistic therapies;
a place to help move and help free your spirit and open doors.

If you would like to be part of a supportive Mumsnet group please come and visit!

Here is to healing, happiness and peace.

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glitterfairy · 09/05/2004 10:33

Oh Papillon this is a great thread and wonderful title! Feeling much much happier and calmer today. Have been to the gym and spent an hour and a half on myself done some creative work on a speech I am giving tomorrow and generally had a good morning. Maybe it was the release of opening the bar last night! Am going to rest this afternoon and have a really thoughtful internal day creating a course for ward sisters who cant cope!Have a lovely sunday and love to beautiful baby paps.

juniper68 · 09/05/2004 22:02

I'm having a good day too Manage to get out last night for a curry as my next door neighbour offered to have the boys and today been to see Aunt Audrey who lives in Whitby but is in Scarborough hospital. She was so ill when I saw her last week and couldn't talk properly She's a very intelligent 82 year old so it was devastating. It's her birthday today and she's back to her coherant self
Plus I read at Church today which always makes me happy as it's something I'm good at (not boasting but when you're a SAHM it's nice to feel useful outside of the home )
And I got to go to Whitby for lunch before Scarborough so that was another boost

juniper68 · 09/05/2004 22:03

that was supposed to be after 'she couldn't talk properly btw

glitterfairy · 11/05/2004 09:13

Happiness and peace are avoiding me today but hopefully will be back tomorrow as I am going to Paris on my with DH Yes! Am going to look at art adn relax for three whole days with no kids or responsibilities yippee. I have to get over today first adn then I can relax!

melsy · 11/05/2004 09:14

OH glitterfairy whats wrong ?? Off to paris lovely , yummy food.

juniper68 · 11/05/2004 09:29

I don't know about you GF but sometimes when I'm going to be doing something exciting I feel down beforehand?? Maybe it's to level me a bit when I get too high (emotionally high i mean lol)

glitterfairy · 12/05/2004 05:16

Hiya melsy and juniper. You are right Juniper and cant sleep as am excited and nervous for no real reason but worrying about leaving kids I think and going so far away from them. Yesterday had to sepnd the day at the ROyal College of Nursing Congress and didnt want to go. We were hosting a reception in the evening and I was worried that because my business partner couldnt be there at first I wouldnt know people and feel awaful. Of course as it turned out I had a godd day met loads of friends and shouldnt have worried, but that is how worries work. I also secrued two new pieces of work and felt ok at the end of the day. Now got to get over my worries about going away!

juniper68 · 12/05/2004 07:42

It's good to hear you're feeling positive now GF
Well done on securing the work!
have a wonderful break and tell us all about it when u get back

ghengis · 12/05/2004 10:55

Well done GlitterFairy . Enjoy your break. My Osteo said an interesting thing yesterday. She had been away for the weekend and said she was living in and enjoying the 'now', i.e. not worrying about the future or fretting over the past. It made me think.

Janstar · 12/05/2004 11:08

I'd like to share something that was a fantastic turning point for me.

I was raised by parents who never expressed pleasure or approval to their children - my mother was a drunken bully and father, although a good man, is grumpy and dissatisfied with life.

I gravitated towards bullying men because I had been trained that my role was to deal with their needs. Mine were always ignored, even by me and I grew more and more neurotic.

After extensive psychotherapy I became aware of all this and learned to make better choices, meeting and marrying my wonderful dh.

But the old patterns remained, and I would exhaust myself trying to be all things for everyone and fretting that if I did not impress my dh with my diligence all the time he would stop loving me.

Then 16 months ago, I broke my ankle badly and was not allowed to put weight on it for three months. With three children, the youngest aged two at that time, my family had to cover for me while I lay on the sofa calling out instructions and complaining about the pain.

I learned that my family love me anyway, even when I can't do anything for them.

This was the most wonderfully liberating realisation of my life. While I am still quite driven, I have only now, at the age of 43, discovered that I am allowed to lounge about and be lazy, serve beans on toast for dinner if I am tired, watch TV during the day if I want - and not feel guilty.

I now feel loved for myself and not for what I can do for people.

Despite all the pain and difficulty, I am so grateful that I broke my ankle.

sibble · 12/05/2004 20:41

Janstar what a lovely ending to your story, it's amazing what life events can turn things around for people.

papillon · 13/05/2004 09:44

Reading what you had written Janstar makes me realise the truth in the saying... in sorrow there is joy.

Genghis, I reckon living in the now is such a good thing. Was feeling very low last week and decided to have a soak in bath to soothe my weary self. I was reading a book on Reiki and it said that a noisy head is often not good thing and to concentrate on the now. I am often such a multi tasker and while that can be very useful it, I also find it quite unsettling. So I stilled my busy brain and just watched the water flowing out of the tap - and I instantly felt abit better!
And I have been trying to do it more this week... Do it with your whole heart...the book says.. like walk, and walk totally, when you go for a walk or cook and only cook (not like me - doing 4 things at once and not accomplishing much)

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glitterfairy · 13/05/2004 10:13

THat is a great story janstar! I have found a sneaky internet connection in my hotel and am addict catching up and getting my fix for the day. Am living in the now and off to spend the whole day gazing at impressionists and modern art! Yes I so happy and life is great! Thought some upbeat emotion would do us all good.

papillon · 13/05/2004 10:18

Yes Glitterfairy - looking forward to more oohh la la installments from Paris

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melsy · 13/05/2004 10:29

Yes lovely to hear from you accross the pond !!! OOH LA LA !!! have a wonderful day

Janstar what a great way of looking at it. How wonderful that you saw that, I love getting those flashes of meanings to a situation , that in the begining seemed awful , but the you get that understanding. Im sure theres something about this in celestine prophecy but I could be wrong. I might have to read it and then comment properly !!

Ghengis great to hear from you on here. I hope you find your nirvana someway. I think the journey can be an interesting one even if difficult.

juniper68 · 14/05/2004 09:45

That's so right janstar, what a lovely story.

One of my closest friends is having a rough time (well spanning 20 years) with her alcoholic DH. She said yesterday something had to change but texted me last night to say he's doing well back on detox?? I feel for her kids, her youngest is 6 and she packed her bag the other week and said I'm not staying here She's coming for tea tonight and I'll keep her until they ring for me to take her home as she never wants to leave bless her.

On a positive note I didn't read the text until this morning as I was in my new summerhouse that was built yesterday, with DH and my lovely next door neighbour. DH and I had Indian take out and she had chinese takeout and a few drinky poos too
My DS1 who's 6 sometimes does breakfast for us and put it in there this morning bless him.

DH and I were sitting in there last night having a cuppa and we both said at the same time that it's our oasis.

glitterfairy · 14/05/2004 16:50

Juniper how did you get a six year old to do breakfast? Very impressive. Thanks for the oo la las. AM in art heaven! Have been gazing at monet, and picasso and matisse and am overwhelmed by how I have changed internally. I used to like modern and challenging art the best but am now relaxed by the impressionists. Looking at Van gogh again with new eyes since I read an article about him and even his obvious tortured soul is interesting. Anyway in calm, inner space reading books about neuropsychology and our amazing brains. We are incredible species and our brains are wonderful we can still learn and grow neurones at any age. see you soon am back tomorrow. Au revoir et bon soir mes amis.xx

melsy · 14/05/2004 16:52

looks like agreat inner journey there glitterfairy, you sound great. Have a safe journey back.

juniper68 · 15/05/2004 15:19

Ooooo GF I'm so jealous. I love art though I'm no expert (at all!!) but when I get chance I like to spend ages looking at paintings. My mum is the same but she knows a lot more about the artists.
My Paternal Grandad sold a Turner painting for a few pounds years ago My mum still remembers this vividly bless her.

It's interesting what you say about the brain cells. My In laws are extremely intelligent even though they're in their 80s. They do crossword and are whizzes at countdown

Cam · 15/05/2004 17:40

Liked your post glitterfairy, I went to Venice (for 2nd time) in April and my head is still full of Tintorettos

glitterfairy · 17/05/2004 20:06

THank you everyone. Have had fab time and really re charged my batteries am off to Dublin again in a week so a little rest would be good. Have brought back loads of posters and one of seagulls for my work to remind me to fly free! All my kids chose one too and my ds7 chose van gogh very impressed. Wow selling a turner for pennies impressive msitake.

papillon · 17/06/2004 12:29

A long time family friend died this week and her funeral happened while I slept last night. dd was restless - perhaps from teething - but woke up afew times so I was able to really send my thoughts and solace to her family; and to my mother.

Found this Maori proverb this morning and wanted to share it with you all. It is very difficult to be so far from family and friends at a time such as this - so I will try and remember to do this today to connect me with NZ and to bring light into my heart.

"Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you."

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luckymum · 17/06/2004 12:44

papillon - that's a lovely proverb. I heard it a few years ago when, after dd was very poorly for a long time, I was having trouble moving on from it. I was dwelling on the bad times and it reminded me to look to the future instead. Also although I'm not particularly religious the 'Footprints' passage really helped too.

Thinking of you

papillon · 17/06/2004 13:08

thank you luckymum

Which footprints proverb was it? - I googled it and found afew!

like this one -
Footprints on the sand of time are not made by sitting down

but do not think it is the one you meant.

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luckymum · 17/06/2004 14:36

Its this passage

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