To just go to a jehovahs witness meeting?

[blobtobetter]

One of the older women at work is a Jehovah's Witness. I don't really know what they are but they don't like blood or birthdays. I thought they were just another type of Christian but apparently not.

She keeps asking me to go to a meeting and I keep putting her off. Thinking now that I should just go once and then never again!?

It sounds really shallow but I wouldn't want to give up Christmas!!

Part of me wonders what it would be like. Would they be over friendly? Would they be distant as I am a heathen type? Can't imagine it really.

Yes I would look into the older books too. I believed that I wouldn't live to be 20, have children, have an adulthood on this earth. Because of the 1914 reference and the 144000. I have questioned this and been told it was wrong and has been changed

Sparkly, I remember being on the stage at a Circuit Assembly when I was 8 with my mother in an interview part where she said she was glad that I would never have to graduate high school in this system of things. When I said something to her about that years later, she insists that wasn't what was said at all. It amazes me the revisionist history that goes on because of "new light'.

One of the things that started me on my journey to leaving was when I was pioneering, I was one of the few that ate lunch at the KH, and I started randomly reading publications while I waited for others to come back from lunch. I read volume 3 of Studies in the Scriptures, and found out that CT Russel came to the date of 1914 not by the times, time and half a time method, but by some sort of odd formula he came up with by analyzing the measurements of the pyramids and how much he was into pyramidology and numerology. That led me to reading more old books and finding more odd stuff. When I said something to one of the other pioneers, who was an elder about what I was reading, many of the old books were subsequently locked away to "prevent them from being stolen'".

Have the JW beliefs changed a lot over the years? It seems like quite a new(ish) religion.

I certainly have a lot of questions to ask today. Maybe I will write them all down so that she can look at them and maybe ask other JWs.

There seem to be plenty of positives and negatives but I think that would be similar for other religions too. I don't think I would end up getting sucked into anything though - I am sure the JWs would only want people who believed in their values 100% to join up.

several times an end date was given to JW followers, those dates came and went, now they say the end time is soon.

They say the Devil came to earth before Ww1, and his time is short.

The signs are in Revelations.

bucket my ex, raised a JW, said that he was always taught that by the time he grew up the end days would have come, and so education/preparation to live in the world was not important.

Needless to say he ended up spectacularly unprepared for life as an adult.

Generally, I've found the religion to be isolating, misogynistic and damaging to kids. I was really shocked when I was hood winked into going to went to an assembly - it does feel rather cultish.

Women are not allowed to address the congregation - so it has to be done via an "interview" by a man, and the woman covers her head.

I saw little toddlers being slapped for not paying attention to stuff they couldn't possibly have understood.

Just saying as I see it.

I have a few friends and family members who are JWs and 'misogynistic' is definitely a word that springs to mind about that religion.

I have asked them about the wearing trousers to meetings thing and they all insist that it isn't a rule that women mustn't wear trousers yet no woman does. So that suggests the reaction and repercussions to a woman doing so would be so off-putting that it may as well be a rule.

I have also asked about why they cannot speak at meetings in the way that men can and they always insist that they don't want to speak at meetings. That isn't the point! - they couldn't if they wanted to!

Plus a woman cannot be an Elder so in fact all positions of authority are held by men. These Elders are from my friends' experiences very intrusive and bullying towards especially the single women in the congregation. I have known a single JW woman in her 30s be absolutely hounded by the Elders of her congregation because she was seen by some fellow witnesses getting a lift in a car from a man alone. They plagued her with phonecalls and unexpected visits to her house until she attended a formal disciplinary meeting with them in which they called her a 'weak woman' and she had to grovel and apologise to prevent them from taking further disciplinary action on the matter.

I have plenty of other problems with the JW religion but the whole attitude to women is the main reason I find it hard to understand a modern woman taking it upon herself to join.

Positions of authority held by men, eh? Out of interest, what are JW views on same-sex marriage?

I would asume they think you can marry who you like within the law, like anyone reading the bible knows, you should not cheat on your wife etc...

They seem to be generally in favour of obeying the laws of the land except where they conflict with core JW beliefs (eg military conscription in some countries, mandatory membership of political parties in others).

I'm pretty sure same-sex marriage would be against their core beliefs though. They are not in favour of practising homosexuality. I think they expect homosexual JWs to remain celibate...? Although that's just from the vague memory of a conversation with a JW friends.

People I know who are 'in the Truth' (which is how they ironically refer to themselves) have always stressed that they personally have no problem with gay people - although I'm not sure how they would react if one of their children was gay and did not want to remain single for their whole life!

I think it is just the act of buggery that there is an issue with, as the bible is against it, like it is against being married to a woman and having sex with another to keep you physically and phychologically safe.

I think it was like pork, it was dangerous to health if not handled and cooked properly, the pork issue has been sorted now.

The anus is full of bugs and they had no condoms back then and drugs still to this day don't cure all bugs caught in general from life.

There is also the issue of men not owning ovaries, so no children could be born back then to a same sex couple. Surrogacy and adoption has recently changed things for same sex couples.

The bible said Man should not lie with Man, there was nothing I am aware of that was against sam sex, just same sex males. I may be wrong though.

So it is old fashioned at the meetings but are marriages run on traditional gender roles? Husband the head of the house and all that?

From what I read in the little book they give you, the Man makes the final decision, he should listen to his woman. I queried this myself and was told if a Man was out of order and not listening the Woman could go to the Elders.

I studied with a JW, on and off for ages, I never joined, it isn't for me, I enjoyed the bible study and learning about JW faith.

The problem you would have blob is that the Man in your situation isn't JW is he?

Homosexual practice is not allowed (gay or lesbian). A person is allowed to be homosexual, but they are not allowed to practice it.

So same-sex marriage or partnership is not compatibile, and a JW persisting in such a relationship would be disfellowshipped.

JWs believe in hate the sin, not the sinner. So they don't hate homosexuals, but they do condemn what they do, and disallow it in the congregation.

I am not in a relationship currently but live back with my parents. They don't believe in God at all.

In marriage, the man is the head of the house, and the women and children are considered in 'subjection' to him as the congregation is in subjection to Jesus.

Yes, the man is meant to take the woman's views into consideration (and treat her with love obviously), but ultimately his word is law in the household.

Also divorce is not considered valid unless your partner committed adultery. So a JW woman (or man) who divorces for any other reason is not allowed to remarry without being considered as commiting adultery themselves (and disfellowshipped).

You may remarry if your partner dies.

Just to clarify an earlier point about women speaking in the congregation. They are not allowed to address the congregation directly as an individual speaker.

What they are allowed to do is participate in demonstrations of how to conduct the preaching work, or conduct bible studies.

Generally, this involves a pair sitting at a table on the platform and 'roleplaying' a scenario. They don't have to cover their heads in these demonstrations (but they do in certain other cases such as leading a prayer while men are present - who can't take the lead for whatever reason).

You get assigned these roleplays by the elders (they hand out slips with the subject of the demonstration) to various women in rotating turns.

So patriarchy, control of women, and homophobia. And it's getting more popular. Marvellous.

blobtobetter In your case, as an individual, there are not too many negative consequences for you even if you got baptised and then decided to voluntarily leave (apart from losing all your JW friends).

The serious negative consequences start to kick in when you have family involved (whom you will also lose if you become dissassociated/disfellowshipped) - assuming they follow the rules (which most do).

From what you say, there is little risk of your parents joining. But when you begin to have your own children, they could end up in exactly the same position I am in, getting baptised and then later wanting to leave but unable to face losing their much loved JW parents and siblings.

I can see you are looking for some sense of guidance and religious community, but there are so many out there that would never do this to you.

I dont have any expereince of the JW faith but going off at a slight tangent here -

Have you thought about signing up for an Alpha course?

It might help you in your Faith Journey,

I have contemplating doing one for ages but 10 weeks is a lot for me to commit to at this moment in time.

The local Alpha course is at a church that I found really unfriendly so that put me off a bit.

The JW at work isn't back until tomorrow so I am writing some questions down! I am sure she will like to have someone taking an interest in her faith and how it works.

That's a shame Blob have you looked at the Alpha course website to see if there are any other courses running in your area? There are about 8 running locally within a five mile radius of my road.

I don't drive so was looking for ones within walking distance. There is another one due to start in September but that seems ages away. I would love to do a bible study - just to have someone to talk about God to and to be able to ask questions.