Alpha - anyone starting the course this Autumn?

[newbeliever]

Hi everyone, I mentioned on another thread about starting a thread for Alpha newbies.

I have signed up to do the course this Autumn, starts Tuesday, 28th September. Was quite surprised when I rang the parish office, there are about 40 people on the course - and it's for 3 hours each week - I was thinking 2 hours max! They start the evening off with dinner and drinks before moving onto the topic for the week. How do your churches run the course?

Thought it would be nice to share our thoughts each week in a safe place - I'm worried about not knowing what to say or just not understanding the topic so would be good to have some fellow MNr's on the journey too.

Anyone else want to join me?

PA and Madhair, thank you as always for your heart-felt comments. It is interesting that both your comments with regards to my DH echo what I was told last night when discussing it with my discussion group leader. He said nothing at the time regarding his path to faith, but later that evening he gave his testimony to the whole course and I was heartened by it as the beginning of his testimony sounded like very much the place my husband is at now. In a nutshell, he explained how he got married in a church and his wife became a Christian some time after having their children. She encouraged him to go on the Alpha course and he left after the first evening as he felt it was totally not for him. So Sunday mornings she went to church and he went to the allotment (this is what my husband does a lot of the time) and on the times he did accompany her, he would spend the whole time looking at his watch and wondering how much longer the service was going to take - my husband does this too! 15 years passed (I so hope it doesn't take my DH this long) and he started to get this feeling that something was missing and that there was something he should be doing that he wasn't - he discussed this with his wife who encouraged him to give the Alpha course another go (this was about 5 years ago), this time he stuck it out, asked lots of questions and slowly it started to dawn on him what life was about - the turning point for him was the Holy Spirit weekend when the vicar prayed for him - following the course he was baptised and has played a very active part in the church ever since.

I had a lovely chat with him afterwards when I explained how I felt that my DH was not on the same journey with me and he reinforced what you said that when his wife pushed him originally to attend Alpha, it wasn't for him and probably put him off for longer than if she had left it and waited for him to come to her.

Sorry for the mega post, but there's more . . .

So again, last night we had a re-cap of what happened at the weekend and the vicar invited us to share our experiences if we wanted to - there was a huge silence, but slowly one or two people were brave enough to speak - I was sitting there thinking, I want to say something, but I couldn't get the words straight in my head - before I knew it, I'd made eye contact with the vicar and found myself giving some sort of mini-testimonial to the 60 or so people on the course! I couldn't tell you what I said, but I ended it by saying that I now felt so strongly about being a Christian that I wanted to re-affirm my faith in some way. Since I have already been baptised and confirmed, I wasn't sure how this could be done. The vicar then went on to invite me to a baptism service this Sunday, saying that I could be re-affirmed. This would involved being plunged into a huge pool they set up at the front of the church - the service only takes place a couple of times a year. I feel that I would like to do this, but this Sunday feels a bit too soon, having said that I don't want to wait until the middle of next year. The other part I am struggling with is the church where I am doing the course is not the church I attend on Sunday. I feel a bit torn as to which church I should affirm my faith at - it would be lovely to do it where my Alpha friends are, but then I feel I also want to demonstrate to my church family how far I have come. What do you think?

Oxo - has this been discussed on your course? Is it something you are considering?

I was praying about it again this morning before typing this message and the doorbell went - I answered the door and there were two people standing there saying 'did I ever think about Jesus' - can you believe it it has been years since I have had any door-step evangelists call.

oooohh Newbeliever, Alpha last night. Brazilian fish stew (can't remember proper name for it) .....absolutely gorgeous and have asked for the recipe. Oh the joys of an international Alpha group

On a more sensible note, this week we talked about telling people about our Faith, sharing the Good News and how we feel about this. Are we worried we would be mocked or verbally attacked and be unable to come up with any answers? Are we ready to 'go public' with family and friends? Will post more later as have to make kids' lunches and go to work but it was a very interesting session. And we talked about babtism - a couple of people from our group are being baptised in a few weeks. Not sure I will be one of them though and am a bit concerned as to why I am putting off

baptism

Hi Oxo your fish stew sounds delicious!

It was interesting to hear what your session was about this week - I expect that will be our topic next week - I could have done with that discussion now.

I was a bit concerned too as to why I feel hesitant about being baptised and I think it is the whole 'going public' thing - it's funny isn't it, because although I classed myself as a Christian before, I now realise that I wasn't. It's the same with all my family they would class themselves as Christians but they aren't - yes, my parents had us christened and sent us to Sunday School, but my parents no longer attend church, they do not read the bible or pray. And as for my DH, whereas 6 months ago we would go to church together and both raise eyebrows at each other when the prayers went on too long or comment on how long the service was that week - I now love/need to go to church and the whole experience is so different for me now. I'm worried about making my DH feel awkward and I know he will be very if I say I'm being baptised this weekend.

To date, I have only gone public with my Christian friends and the family at Church. I need to tell my DH

Willowfae - how are you getting on? Hope you are ok.

Me again!

Madhair - I just wanted to say that I prayed for you last night. I didn't read your post properly through the first time and when I re-read it I thought how amazing you are that you can come and support us here when you are in pain.

Thank you for being here for us and if you need to off-load, then please do

hello newbeliever

Thankyou, that means a lot. It really is a privilege to be on this journey with you :)

As for baptisms etc...I would say that you will know when it is the right time, you need to be ready in all ways to make that step. In some ways I'd say don't rush into it but in others sometimes you need the momentum to carry you forward and go for it. Maybe NB you need to talk it through with dh before deciding anything, it's important that his thoughts are considered and that he feels you want him to be by your side and with you in it, iyswim. There should be plenty of chances to go for it when the time is right, maybe you need some time to get used to it all and find your feet. See what 'feels' right.

Oxo, glad you had an interesting session too. The whole 'going public' thing must be pretty scary but once it's done you'll be fine and it'll feel great even with any responses you get (which you will.) But people will see gradual changes in you which will say more than any words. :)

Good advice Madhair - that's another reason why I am feeling hesitant, I just haven't had the opportunity to have a decent chat with my DH.

It's tricky at the moment as DH has been off work with stress - he had a panic attack back in September, first time ever - and was then off work for a month. He's back at work now, but we identified he was being bullied by his boss and he's currently going through a 'fairness at work' procedure, so times are tough for him at the moment . That's probably why I feel so guilty for being so happy when my DH is so low. Even when he's home he's not really up for talking, hence why I feel hesitant about revealing my new found faith.

He's off work tomorrow, so hopefully he will be in better spirits and the right opportunity to talk will present itself.

Hi NB - I've not posted on this thread for a while but am following it still!

Having given it some thought I'd agree with MHD about not rushing into baptism. I feel as though I did a bit - I don't regret it but I do rather wish that I'd taken things a little bit more slowly and steadily. It was as though I was just anxious to 'get it done' and hadn't really fully thought through the implications or about how / why I wanted to do it (if I'd taken it more slowly I might have decided to go for a full immersion baptism for example - I'm rather sad that I didn't!). I guess you can equate it to rushing into a marriage (because it IS a life-time commitment!). It's not that the marriage was wrong, just that the road might have been smoother and happier if you'd hung back a bit and taken your time :) But as MHD said - it's really about what feels right for you but again, I'd say take your time to 'feel' properly IYSWIM!

As for your DH - I'm sorry that he's having such a tough time. Please don't feel guilty about your own happiness though. Being happy and settled and at peace in yourself puts you in a much stronger position to help him. Of course be sensitive to his feelings in talking about your own happiness, but let your quiet happiness be a support to him. In your strength and happiness you are much better able to 'carry' him for a while.

MrsC thank you so much for posting - I'd pretty much arrived at my decision this afternoon, and having just read your post it confirms that I do feel I'm rushing it a bit. I almost feel like I needs to adjust and come to terms with my faith before I start telling other people. There is simply not enough time between now and Sunday to do that and I would love to feel supported by my DH and other family members when I do finally take the 'plunge'

Thank you also for your support re my DH - it is really hard going even with my 'quiet happiness' but I have noticed this week that I am much calmer with him and I'm not snapping at him, which I have been guilty of before

newbeliever, I couldn't read your comments about your DH and not post. I am in a similar position - my husband is currently looking for work, our financial situation is precarious to say the least and we are both so worried. I also feel guilty for this incredible happiness and peace I have, despite our troubles. But I do think my husband has noticed a change in me, a calmness in our home and more warmth and love in our family since I came to Christ and this can only be a good thing.

Maybe it would be good to pray for everyone on this thread - for those of us who are currently in an Alpha group and those who are faithful supporters and encouragers

Doing it already, Oxo ;)

Me too :)

Like MrsC said, don't feel guilty for your state of mind. Your happiness and peace will lift the atmosphere in your homes and make differences for your OHs, even if this is difficult to see. It will be having an effect. Hang in there and continue to soak in this joy :)

Hi Oxo, sorry to hear you are having a tough time too at the moment.

Good idea about praying for everyone on the thread - I'm doing it now

Think that is enough posts from me for one day - I go from one extreme to the other

Praying is always good!

It has been so lovely that you have come so far. We are told not to worry, so just enjoy your new spiritual life and everything will be looked after. God tells us that everything works together for the good, for those who love Him. You love Him now, so all those worries can be given to Him to sort out. Sit back and see what amazing things happen! Your DH's are in God's sight!!

As for the baptism question, you need to do what is right for you. There are both sides of the argument. In the new testament people did not wait, BUT I truly believe that it is a good witness to family and friends and preparing for it is an important part.(I waited about 20 years, if I am honest, but knew when the time was right!!) Family are always the worst to "come out" to, but your actions can speak a thousand words and perhaps it would be good for them to see your new spiritual life in action and see how you have changed for the better first. Then the baptism can have a hugely powerful effect on them.

I will now be awol for a few days, but please be assured of my prayers for you all. (and some appreciated here, too, as I go into hospital to have a tumour removed in the morning) I am not worried though, God is in control!!

PA, I have just prayed for you that everything will be fine tomorrow. You are all wonderful people and I am so thankful to know I am now part of this huge family.

With strength and prayers,

Blessings, oxo

Hi everyone

PA - thanks for your advice re baptism, I've decided to wait for a bit, although I will try to attend the service on Sunday as I have never seen an adult baptism before. It's in the evening and I've heard from my fellow Alpha attenders that it is a really moving ceremony. So looking forward to attending without the spotlight on me this time . . .

Also all the best for tomorrow - you sound so strong - I have been praying for you today.

Thank you both. I feel so held by God through all this that I feel less nervous than if I was going to the dentist in the morning.

Oh, NB definitely go to the baptism. I get more teary at baptisms than I do at weddings. They are wonderful and you can really feel God's presence. Oh enjoy!! If it was close to me I would walk from my hospital bed to be there!!! Would DH go with you? worth a try to see if he would go along, they are soooooo powerful!!

newbeliever, it was after my friend's baptism in May that I became a Christian . She invited me to her baptism as her husband wouldn't go and her kids would only come along to the actual baptism at a local pool and not to the church service and testimonies before hand.

I was a bit nervous about attending as I knew no one else, I didn't know any of the worship songs, felt like I wasn't entitled to be there etc. But on that day, my life really did change - the atmosphere was electric and calm at the same time. As everyone bowed their heads, I remember praying "please God, give me some of the joy and happiness these people have" never thinking in a million years that He would listen let alone respond

I remember sobbing as my friend gave her testimony, even though I had heard it many times as she had practiced on me to see if it sounded okay!!

I am in a similar position to you in that we have a baptism coming up on the 21st November, which I am so looking forward to, but I have chosen not to be baptised this time. I need more time to get used to the new me. I also want my family and friends to be there and it will take quite a lot of courage to invite them

Oxo - you sound very similar to me! I hadn't realised the adult baptism services were so special, nor that everyone gave a testimony beforehand - like you, I want my family and friends to be there but also feel about inviting them. I think we all need a bit of time to get used to me being a Chrisitian .

I'll report back Monday and let you know how it goes.

PA - hope everything went well today - I have been thinking of you.

I can understand now why you recommended DH come with me to the baptism tomorrow, unfortunately, I don't think I will have any luck there, it takes quite a bit to encourage him to come to church in the morning, twice in one day would be pushing it .

PA, how are you? I have been thinking and praying about you over the last few days and hope everything went well with your operation.

How did the service go nb?

Keeping praying for you all.

NB tell us all about it

Hi guys

Internet down all day today was driving me crazy as i was desperate to post an update for you all

So, I went to the baptism service on Sunday evening and I found it a really emotional service.

There were 10 people being baptised (not all adults). The service began like normal, and the baptism part was in the middle section. It began with each of the adults giving their testimony - their accounts were so moving - then there was a hymn whilst everyone was invited to move up the church to be near the pool for the actual baptism. I say 'pool' it was more like a deep birthing pool - had a couple of steps up the side and the water came up to their waist.

Both the vicar and the curate were in the water and each of the candidates took their turn to enter the water and be baptised - after each baptism the congregation applauded the invidiual - it really was a special moment and I felt priviledged to witness it . My favourite of the evening was a chap who is in my Alpha group and his whole family were baptised together (his wife, two sons 15 and 13 and their 2 year old daughter) - it brought a tear to my eye .

I did feel a slight pang that I was not one of the ones being baptised, but I know that it wasn't the right time for me and my turn will come. I am certainly not ready to give my testimony to the whole church yet - they didn't warn me about that bit

Just had Alpha tonight too - was all about resisting evil - I found it quite hard going tonight (did you Oxo?) - there was also a testimony concerning the work of the devil and how this lady's faith in God had kept her safe - she gave a number of examples in one week whereby God had kept her safe and I found myself thinking surely that is just a coincidence - then I found myself thinking is that the devil putting doubt into my head . Anyone know what would be good to read to help with this subject? I've read the Screwtape Letters.

Food - had cottage pie with veg tonight - was yummy again and fruit cake for 'afters'.

Am so glad you posted as I was desperate to know how it went

Will post this afternoon about the resisting evil bit even though I couldn't actually get to Alpha that night but I did listen to the podcast and read the chapter in the book. Have you read Mere Christianity', C.S.Lewis? I'm almost finished it but am struggling a bit with a chapter near the end about killing but I do have to bear in mind it was written soon after WWII which I think influences the style greatly.

Will post more later