Baby screams during every car journey!

[ShelbyPa1991]

My nearly 18 week old screams blue murder every car journey unless she is asleep. She screams to the point of holding her breath. We upgraded her car seat thinking it was that, apparently it isn’t. If someone sits in the back with her to distract her she is fine but I absolutely cannot have someone there all the time.
does anyone have any advice?

It’s gotten so bad that it makes me want to cry whenever it happens and I don’t want to be that mum that doesn’t go anywhere ever!

My granddaughter was like this I’m afraid! She eventually grew out of it - driving was pretty traumatic for a while, sorry I’ve no solutions though.

@Soontobe60how long did it take her to grow out of it?

My son is like this. Only stopped when we front faced him at 15 months. I know Mumsnet will crucify me for it but having a screaming toddler in the back is extremely distracting and I actually scratched my car once because of it, I was so stressed I wasn't paying enough attention when coming out of a parking spot and came too close to a pole.

Some of my children were like this, and as they got older is was obvious they had travel sickness. Can you try the windows down a bit to circulate more air?

My daughter was exactly the same. She screamed through every single journey, no matter how short unless she immediately fell asleep. I know its not the done thing these days to forward face as soon as baby is able but the day we forward faced her at around 14 months was the day she stopped screaming.

Same. My boy hated the car and screamed through every journey until we forward faced him at 14 months. He is now horrendously travel sick after more.than 20.mins in a car. Have you tried an osteopath? He was a little better after one visit but still didn't like.the car.

@MissSkate we had seen a cranial osteopath previously but not for the car. Although I am considering seeing another one as she holds so much tension

Mine was terrible and I'd be even more anxious when they stopped screaming suddenly. I used to worry they'd stopped breathing. I gave up and forward faced.
Its not ideal, especially with the roads as they are and they were stuck back in the back on longer journeys wirth an adult in the back.

My dd was like this. We just stopped using the car and walked or took the bus/tube to most places. I think she liked being able to interact with me face to face. It must be scary for a small baby to just be staring at the back of a seat.

One of mine was like this too. Nothing to do with car sickness as would scream even before we set off. And various car seats and positions were tried to no avail. Just had to wait for them to grow out of it but took months

Both mine were like this until we forward faced at 15 months as well. If they were not sleeping, they were screaming. Torture, though luckily we didn’t need to use the car other than weekends.

My eldest was like this.
In the end I put him in the front with me. Not ideal at all, but being driven to distraction by the screaming was becoming dangerous.

Have you got a mirror so you can see each other? Do you sing to her when she cries? You could play white noise or lullabies? Do you put a blanket on her so she's definitely not cold? Some form of entertainment like a teether or soft rattle? Do you put the back light on if it's dark when you're driving? Just trying to think what i used to do.

My daughter had to front face earlier. My grandson would vomit rear facing.

Are they in a rear facing seat? Get a mirror on the headrest of the seat facing them so they can still see you and their face cuddly toy / picture book to distract

DD was like this between about 3 and 6 months. It was shit. We got the train a lot. She did grow out of it. Try and limit longer car journeys where you can.

Toys/ dummy/ snacks/ mirror helped as she got older.

Try turning the fan of the heating off. My daughter disliked the sound of aircon, fans etc to the extent I couldn't walk into Argos or Lloyds bank without her screaming the place down like I was trying to murder her - walk out and it stopped. SO Argos I'd go in and order and pay, walk out, walk back in 10 mins later to collect. Bank, I'd hand in a note to the welcome desk explaining and ask that I could be called in when it's my turn out of respect for the other branch users. They soon got used to it. I'd use other banks for taking cash out of machines etc She's adult now and still has sensitive ears - won't go to live music even with top quality earplugs for example.

Very normal I’m afraid. DS was like that until around 5/6 months old. We would wait until he was asleep and then put him in the car so any trips were planned around naps. I also sat in the back with him every trip and if I was on my own, it was either short journeys or public transport (live in London zone 2 so good transport options).

The older he got the more we could distract with music and games. I started doing long journeys on my own from around a year old. He’s now 4 and still rear faces so fortunately we didn’t need to change that (no judgment towards those who forward face early - you have to do what you have to do!).

My daughter was like this, though having someone in the back with her really didn’t help.

switching to a convertible seat instead of an infant seat gave us a bit of improvement. The screaming was less intense and often didn’t start for a couple of minutes.

my world was very, very small for a couple of years as we lived rurally and could not get anywhere without a car. It was just life and we had to accept it. Only absolutely necessary trips justified that torture.

Some cars and car seats can go in the front passenger seat with the airbag switched off, would that make her better if she can see you?
do still check the seat and the fit, she might be in wrong and be uncomfortable. There are Facebook groups you can post and they’ll help.
it sounds silly but have to tried nursery rhymes or other children’s music, mine cried so much but I put some Disney songs on and she would chill out for a minute or two at least to give me a breather. Mine is still rear facing but is happier now the seat is high enough that she can see out the window.
I also tried those rattles you strap to their hands and I really didn’t go far for the first year unless someone was with me I’m afraid

Yeah, my DD had a phase of this. She did grow out of it.

Best solution I found was to pass her biscuits over my shoulder from the front seat. Shoot me!

a friends child was like this and they found out when he got a bit older he actually gets very badly travel sick

Somebody already said it but mine were more travel sick rearward facing although obviously not able to tell you what's bothering them, you find out when you stop to pick them up and they vomit down your front☺️, or when they are older and they tell you tummy hurts. Only thing that helped mine was them being asleep or forward facing 🤷‍♀️

.......hang a tablet or your phone from the head rest and let baby watch Ms Rachel or The Wiggles or whatever you find baby likes. They'll begin to look forward to getting into the car seat for the treat of their fave songs/show. Download episodes on Netflix if you've not got YouTube premium to avoid adverts...... Am I the world's worst mother? Why is nobody else suggesting this? Worked for us.

Happy baby, happy mama and safer journey!

Super common I'm afraid. My DD was like this until around a year old then gradually got better. Now at 21 months she is totally fine. Hang in there, I don't think there's a quick fix!