Hi 👋🏻
I'm looking for a but if advice to help me parent my 8 year old son better.
Before I get into it I just want to say that he has had a challenging couple of years through no fault of his own which is why I think I've let it get this bad although these behaviours were present from a very young age.
I'm a single Mom and my son sees his Dad (overnight) regularly. He is an only child and has been raised around adults only.
So behaviours...he swears, shouts, doesn't pick up after himself, doesn't listen to clear instructions, strops and tantrums when he doesn't get his own way, is very rigid in his thinking and nothing I say can change his mind, obsessive, is extreamly disrespectful in the way he speaks to me and other people and is very controlling of me and what I can or can't do. He also argues constantly with his friends and doesn't have a 'best friend'.
On the plus side he sleeps well, can be loving, very funny, behaves in school, and will excel in things that interest him. He is behind his peers at school and always has been but he tries his best and consistently makes progress.
The thing I'm struggling with is consequences for his poor behaviour. The only things he really cares about are his bike, x box and tablet so I tend to confiscate these things when he is badly behaved. Even though taking these things away from him distresses him, he doesn't learn from it and the very next day will repeat the behaviour even though he risks losing one of his favourite things.
Does anyone have any advice on consequences for disrespectful behaviour that differ from the above?
Thanks for reading.