Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

OPAL play - concerns for bullying and mixed age groups

33 replies

denimflame · 01/12/2025 17:08

I need an outsider point of view! My daughter is 4 and in reception and at her school they do something called OPAL play where all years are in the playground at the same time (except nursery kids). She's come home today saying that she was trying to play with something and that there was older kids playing there that were laughing at her and saying 'well I'm older than you' and not letting her play. I know I can't wrap her in cotton wool and she needs to build resilience but I don't think it's acceptable for her to 1 be playing with kids twice her age and 2 to be laughed and made fun of by kids twice her age. I'm going to speak to her teacher tomorrow but honestly I don't feel it's right to have all years playing with all years (I.e. a year 6 who would be 10-11 playing with reception who are 4-5) 🤯🤯🤯

OP posts:
denimflame · 01/12/2025 22:34

RedTitBlueTitOldTitNewTit · 01/12/2025 20:27

I am with you OP.
Our school have OPAL and on the whole its great (my Year 3 loves it)
BUT
My little Reception child is often quite confused and sad when I ask him about playtime.

His teacher called me over a few weeks ago to tell me that he had sworn at the Year 5 and 6s he was playing with. They had told the teacher that he did that. I dont understand why 11 Year olds are wanting to play with very young 4 Year olds and I really can't imagine he just decided to swear at them with no provocation from them. Either way, whether it was his fault or not I don't imagine that situation would have happened with other 4 year olds.
I'd rather he was being encouraged to play with children who are more similar in maturity and interests than with children three times his age.
He's very little and I'm certain its not his teacher telling him about 6-7 and Stranger Things.

So many posts here saying you're overreacting are from people who do not have OPAL in their schools, it's really great for older ones but I think that the very youngest kids should be excluded.

Thank you I thought I was going mad! I think genuinely it's a good little scheme but I think people are forgetting that she's only 4 and isn't as mature as the older kids and don't share the same interests etc to be mingling with any of them. Apparently I'm not allowed to speak on behalf of my 4 year old child and how she's feeling based on the feelings she's telling me she's experiencing! But when they're so wrapped up in cotton wool and segregated in nursery for them to be chucked in the deep end in a playground with a lot more older kids I can ASSUME that it's confusing. And I'm not tarnishing all older children with the same brush I'm sure there's a lot of them that are gentle and polite but of course you're going to get the odd few who think they're grown it's bound to happen and won't want to play and share with little children. I will stand on the hill and say that nursery and reception should be segregated from the rest in terms of opal and that I do not see what interests a 10-11 year old to a 4 year old. And I also do not believe that OPAL is complete rubbish and needs scrapping because my child's had one blip I just think there's a lot of loop holes in monitoring you can't have a teacher watch every single child and I'd expect that anyway in her year group too but most when shes mingling with very much older kids just to clarify one more time for everyone she's 4 she's just left nursery it's like throwing a nursery child in with a year 6 child!!

i think this is the last I'll speak on the post about it because a lot of things are being misconstrued and I'm being painted as some manipulating projecting monster. I'm hearing my child, I'm hearing her experiences and yes I will speak to a teacher or TA to make them aware of these issues so that they can just reflect and hopefully another younger child or even any child won't feel as though they're not allowed to play and will be laughed at. It's all about feedback not everything can be sunshine and roses but we can certainly voice and advocate if we believe there's something that needs attention paid to it. At the end of the day kids will be kids I don't have any gunning for anyone at all we were all kids once upon a time!

OP posts:
denimflame · 01/12/2025 22:40

Iloveagoodnap · 01/12/2025 20:05

When I was at school the infants’ and juniors’ playgrounds were separated by a line on the ground and when I was in upper juniors I used to stand on the line and talk/play with the little ones. Depending on the teachers on duty sometimes I was allowed into the infants’ playground to lead games like Farmers in his Den. I loved it as I wanted to be a teacher and was very good with younger children. So I agree that it is good for older and younger children to be able to play together.

That said, there were lots of older kids who wouldn’t have wanted to play with the little ones, and some areas where the little ones wouldn’t have been safe such as the top end of the junior playground where the (usually) oldest boys played football.

So I think that allowing all children to be together in all areas needs to be carefully managed. If older ones are monopolising an area that is suitable for younger children to use as well then teachers need to step in and have ‘buddies’ or a timetable or
something else to make it safe for the youngest children. So I definitely think you should let your child’s teacher know that bigger kids are being mean at playtime, because if they don’t know they can’t do anything about it.

This is a fab response thank you and the sort of wavelength I was thinking of. I don't believe it should be completely stopped but there are somethings that are suitable for older ages and not suitable for younger ages and there are some older kids that might not necessarily want to play with younger kids which is completely fine they're very much entitled to not want to play with anyone they don't want to play with (but this can be very confusing for the younger ones!) I think there's a couple grey areas on it and the little ones need more monitoring or something to indicate that they can or cannot go in certain areas (i.e. where the older kids are kicking around a football, the tall adventure playgrounds)

OP posts:
gogomomo2 · 01/12/2025 22:42

My dc’s first school was small, so only one playground for all years, in the summer term even the nursery kids who were joining the school came into the playground.

denimflame · 01/12/2025 22:46

MsSquiz · 01/12/2025 20:03

DD1’s school does OPAL from year 1 to 6 and she loves it.
I have no issue with her being around any of the older kids, I think it helps them to start building relationships with such a variety of ages, both boys and girls.
I’s sorry your DD had this situation happen, but why not turn it into a learning situation?
did she tell a teacher?
is she actually allowed to do the thing she was trying to do, or were the bigger kids right?
help her be more assertive

Thank you for your response you explained this in a lovely constructive way! I completely get where you're coming from and I'm glad you're children are having a great experience with OPAL that's all I want for mine too! She's never really had a problem until today she's ran into some not very hearing older children and yes I'm sure that's created some resilience in her which I'm glad about but I never want my child to feel upset about something as simple as wanting to play! I've had a good conversation with her about telling a teacher if she's ever upset about anything at all and taking things on the chin and looking at it in a different way. I've had a couple comments saying maybe the kids were in the right and this may be I wasn't there and she's 4 so she may have seen it in a way that it wasn't really was but this just proves my point a little that she's not as mature as the older one to grasp and understand!

OP posts:
AutumnAllTheWay · 01/12/2025 22:48

I wouldn't have wanted my 5 year old on a playground with loads of much older children either op.

Its always been ks1/ ks2 split in schools I've worked in.

Eleven year olds running about could cause serious damage to a 4 or 5 year old if they run into each other

denimflame · 01/12/2025 22:52

AutumnAllTheWay · 01/12/2025 22:48

I wouldn't have wanted my 5 year old on a playground with loads of much older children either op.

Its always been ks1/ ks2 split in schools I've worked in.

Eleven year olds running about could cause serious damage to a 4 or 5 year old if they run into each other

Yes I agree! It's funny because she's just moved schools in the past couple of weeks. Her old school did OPAL but nursery and reception were segregated and played together. All other years did the OPAL play in the one playground and it was very structured I know the mums of a girl who's in Year 1 and with them learning new curriculums and advancing their speaking and reading she's a lot more forward and have the abilities to communicate with the older children and voice themselves and to teachers and TA's. This school only segregates nursery. Of course they're not going to change it based on my opinion of it but I dont agree with them being included in OPAL play yet especially not when they have a lot of activities and an outdoor area JUST for reception as well. The kids in reception have more than enough to keep them occupied in their area than opening up the gates to the bigger playground for them! X

OP posts:
happydays312 · 01/12/2025 22:54

I would've been wary when dd2 started in eyfs - she was very anxious about school and playtime and would've been worried by the older children and the amount of children as well. I can hear you are worried - go and talk to the school and ask how it is monitored, especially for the little ones. Have they been shown what to do if they are unhappy? Had it modelled so they are really clear? At my school we keep ks1/2 on different playgrounds but by the summer time we do all play together on the field. The little ones are usually very well settled by this point and know the drill of speaking to an adult if they are worried.

denimflame · 01/12/2025 23:00

happydays312 · 01/12/2025 22:54

I would've been wary when dd2 started in eyfs - she was very anxious about school and playtime and would've been worried by the older children and the amount of children as well. I can hear you are worried - go and talk to the school and ask how it is monitored, especially for the little ones. Have they been shown what to do if they are unhappy? Had it modelled so they are really clear? At my school we keep ks1/2 on different playgrounds but by the summer time we do all play together on the field. The little ones are usually very well settled by this point and know the drill of speaking to an adult if they are worried.

Thank you! Yes it's a bit confusing even for myself as we take our kids to school drop them off and pick them back up I don't know what goes on in the school day! I think you've made a very great point there and I'm going to have a nice friendly chat and just query a bit more into OPAL play and how the school monitors it so that I can also understand too! Yes it's a worry that's all she's still so very young and so very new to properly being in school and is the eldest of my children so she's never really had that experience of playing with older children and knowing that sometimes they like to have their own space with their own friends of their own ages! I'm definitely going to just make the teachers aware of the issue she's raised to me and find out a bit more on how they monitor it! X

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page