Why are my children so poorly / susceptible?

[NCev]

I am genuinely worried that my two DC have immune issues that need to be investigated.

My DC1 is just 2 and has had: suspected infection when born, chickenpox (twice!), RSV, bronchiolitis, at least 10 + ear infections (we've gone to see a specialist about this and recommended grommets), tonsillitis, RSV again, viral skin infections. And obviously multiple coughs, colds, sickness bugs.

My DC2 is 6 months and has had blood infection when born, bronchiolitis, viral meningitis, tonsillitis, and most recently hospitalised for RSV, bronchiolitis and adenitis. He's also had a permanent cold since he was born.

We are a very normal, very clean family. We all eat very well, get lots of fresh air and excerise. I am just going out of my mind that this doesn't seem normal. The amount of hospital visits, weeks of antibiotics, and various meds is really concerning to me. The doctors tell us this is normal but obviously we see a different one every time. Has anyone else ever has it this bad? Or is this within normal range?

Thank you x

I would look if there are any environmental factors you could improve? Is your house warm and dry (not damp?) Does anyone smoke in the home? Do you have a wood burner, coal/coke fire or an open flame gas fire? All of these things will contribute to indoor air pollution which can make respiratory and ear infections worse. Even a gas hob or oven is quite polluting so ventilate the kitchen well if you cook with gas and consider moving to induction if you can.

I disagree that the list is otherwise sensible. For the avoidance of doubt, it is bat shit crazy to withhold vaccination from your children.

A good idea to reduce harsh chemicals, cut out UPF where you can, and increase fruit and veg. The evidence on probiotics is fairly convincing so worth a try too (just eat yogurt don't waste money on pills and potions) but don't cut out whole food groups without professional advice. There is nothing magical about orange juice - no need to give them this daily unless you all like it - and there's an awful lot of quackery surrounding allergy/deficiency testing, so only pursue this through your GP.

Thank you for all responses and sorry for slow reply. Been in hospital with DC2 as has been vomiting for 4 days unable to keep anything down. The A&E Dr says no sign of dehydration so I brought her home however he has since vomitted everything back up. And now DC1 ear is leaking fluid again. I am going to hold off taking her to GPs as she doesn't seem to be in paid and I don't want more antibiotics thrown at us that clearly aren't solving the problem.

Both born via c-section. I tried desperately to breastfeed with both, and was unable to. It's still a painful subject for me and I feel an immense guilt. I pumped for as long as I could so they were both on breastmilk for at least 3 months but then we had to introduce formula. We are a pretty healthy household in terms of what we eat, most things are home cooked with the odd treat.

DC2 is supposed to be starting nursery this week as I have to go back to work and I just can't imagine how much worse it's going to get.

Sorry to hear your daughter has been so unwell. I only mentioned breastfeeding in regards to being completely objective to answer your question on whether the level of illnesses is normal, sorry you feel so much guilt about it, I know it’s so tough. I would say as they were both born via c section and only had pumped breastmilk for a short time, in my opinion the level of illnesses are probably within the range of normal as their immune systems won’t have developed as well. So I would focus on vitamins and probiotics to try to build it up.

Honestly this sounds normal to me! They say around 10 illnesses in the first year of life is usual but that's an average so mNy children will have more. DC1 was a summer baby and started nursery in spring time and definitely had less illnesses and generally less severe ones than DC2 who was an autumn baby and started nursery then following autumn. DC2 was breastfed longer than DC1 too if that makes you feel any better OP (3m Vs 10m). The first winter that they're in childcare is always the worst I think then it gradually improves.

That being said I'd say it's flipped the other way around with my big two now in that DC1 who is 7 gets unwell more than DC2 who is 4. I think that's because she has a habit of putting her fingers in her mouth bleurgh.

Mine wasn’t anywhere near as severe as yours but had repeated sticky sinus infections. Once her adenoids were taken out she’s rarely been ill and only with mild flu’s. Don’t think she’s even missed school for those. Hasn’t needed antibiotics since. Maybe ask for a referral to ENT.

Don’t worry about the breastfeeding thing, mine was born via c-section and has survived a vrial illness that left her the only kid standing in her class. She also bounces back faster than a lot of kids when she’s poorly. Sure it will impact immunity but it’s not the only thing.

This sounded like my 4th child until she had her tonsils and adenoids out, and grommets in. It was a complete game changer - she had multiple hospitalizations and rounds of antibiotics before that. She has now been virtually illness free for 14-months.

If it helps, I breastfed her for 2 years, so it wasn’t that!

Have they had their childhood immunisations?

I've got to say I've never heard of children being so ill before, I'd also worry OP about this level of sickness.

Outside of nursery do they socialise with other kids a lot?

I'd be tempted to take a month or two off work (using the 18 weeks per child child youre entitled) and isolated them to get them back to good health.

What are their diets like? Have they ever had bloods to see if low in vit d or iron?

With both children suffering the same I would look to get them tested for genetic immune vulnerabilities. Ask your GP to do a
Basic immune screen
Full blood count (lymphocytes especially)
Immunoglobulins (IgG, IgA, IgM, IgE)
IAG subclasses
Vaccine antibody responses (e.g., tetanus, pneumococcal)
and for referral to a paediatric immunologist.

I would second grommets and possibly looking into adenoids as well. I know a fair few children who were extremely susceptible to respiratory tract infections as well as ear infections until these were sorted.

It is usual for children to be repeatedly ill as they build up their immune systems. My DD was basically a walking snotfest between October and April from the age of 1 to 3. She literally had rattles in her chest, streaming nose and intermittent temperatures for 6 months of the year. We spoke to her paediatrician who basically said the only way to stop her was to keep her at home and not in a group setting. She is 5 now and has sailed through the winter period now. So think she was just building up her immunity. Agree about probiotics - we did lots and lots of yoghurt.

You could try giving them fermented milk. It’s really easy to make. I buy mango pulp in tins and my kids just mix that in and wolf it down.

https://freshlyfermented.co.uk/product/organic-milk-kefir-grains/

My top tips are

1. support gut microbiome with diet where poss
2. have a look into hair mineral test analysis - we did this and found DS has several nutrient deficiencies including zinc, which supports immune system.

The nutrient deficiencies are linked to gut health because overgrowth of the wrong bugs can reduce absorption. (This can be worsened by antibiotic use but I am very pro antibiotics when needed obviously)