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Original poster

Emotional toddler

36 replies

Mumofonexo · 04/09/2025 19:54

My now 2 year old has always been very emotional and cried allot. To me it seems excessive how much he cries/ screams.

All his basic needs are met yet he has several full on meltdowns a day.

I feel like he hates me or something and whatever I do isn’t good enough.

for example trying to get him dressed he throws himself on the floor and screams 🙃

is this normal? How do you cope with more than one because it’s exhausting

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Original poster
Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 14:19

verycloakanddaggers · 05/09/2025 14:00

All his basic needs are met yet he has several full on meltdowns a day.

I feel like he hates me or something and whatever I do isn’t good enough.

You may need to think carefully about your own emotional responses so that you can help him. Assuming he hates you is an overemotional response from you - if you are responding very emotionally he will pick up on this.

Also tantrums have nothing to do with meeting basic needs - they're an emotional reaction, often to very minor things.

How do you react when he first starts to get upset?

Wow so blame the parent

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Original poster
Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 14:23

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 05/09/2025 13:57

I’ve basically been told it’s normal toddler behaviour and just to get on with it

I don't agree with the nurse you saw.
Tantrums that last an hour or more, plus your child not liking having any clothes on, and making you so miserable into the bargain, would make me wonder about autism/ADHD.

Does he have strong food texture dislikes too?

I see that his nursery has flagged up hyperactivity.

Hmm I wouldn’t say so but he can be fussy with food but not necessarily textures x

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Original poster
Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 14:28

dizzydizzydizzy · 05/09/2025 13:52

I was thinking about ADHD and autism too.

My DC2 who is early 20s has in the last year been diagnosed with both (and dyslexia). DC2 had issues with clothes as a toddler as welll. They didn't go naked but their preschool reported me to social services for not being warmly enough dressed!!!! DC2 would just refuse to wear most things and generally would take off socks or gloves or hats. There was only one cardigan they loved but they usually did not have anything underneath the cardigan.

OP it might be worth even now having a chat with your GP about possible neurodivergence. I would keep a diary about your child's behaviour. I would strongly recommend getting formal diagnoses. DC2 has been really disadvantaged by not having them earlier. However, I am pleased to say that their university studies are going well - but they have had a lot of challenges at university to overcome.

Thank you so much for the advice and understanding. My son also takes his socks and shoes off at any given moment.

I think I will be going back to the doctors x

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dizzydizzydizzy · 05/09/2025 14:36

Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 14:28

Thank you so much for the advice and understanding. My son also takes his socks and shoes off at any given moment.

I think I will be going back to the doctors x

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Yeah that’s very sensible. If you don’t have any luck with the GP you see, try another one. Some are not that understanding about neurodiversity.

verycloakanddaggers · 05/09/2025 14:50

Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 14:19

Wow so blame the parent

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I asked a question. You haven't given really much information about what's happening.

It could be something that the GP can help with, but also may not be.

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 14:56

verycloakanddaggers · 05/09/2025 14:50

I asked a question. You haven't given really much information about what's happening.

It could be something that the GP can help with, but also may not be.

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No you are being very judgemental

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BunnyRuddington · 05/09/2025 17:03

Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 13:40

Thank you so much!

yes I’ve basically been told it’s normal toddler behaviour and just to get on with it?

X

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Tantrums that last an hour are definitely not normal.

Have you managed to make a start in the assessment forms i linked to? Let us know how he scores Flowers

BunnyRuddington · 05/09/2025 17:05

verycloakanddaggers · 05/09/2025 14:00

All his basic needs are met yet he has several full on meltdowns a day.

I feel like he hates me or something and whatever I do isn’t good enough.

You may need to think carefully about your own emotional responses so that you can help him. Assuming he hates you is an overemotional response from you - if you are responding very emotionally he will pick up on this.

Also tantrums have nothing to do with meeting basic needs - they're an emotional reaction, often to very minor things.

How do you react when he first starts to get upset?

Bloody Hell. Tell my you haven’t got a DC with ND without actually saying it.

Original poster
Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 17:29

BunnyRuddington · 05/09/2025 17:05

Bloody Hell. Tell my you haven’t got a DC with ND without actually saying it.

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Omg thank you! The judgement in that post!

I felt like I was being investigated by social services 🙈

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Original poster
Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 17:30

BunnyRuddington · 05/09/2025 17:03

Tantrums that last an hour are definitely not normal.

Have you managed to make a start in the assessment forms i linked to? Let us know how he scores Flowers

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Going to do it tonight when he’s in bed. I’ve been at work so haven’t had a chance yet x

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BunnyRuddington · 05/09/2025 17:32

Mumofonexo · 05/09/2025 17:30

Going to do it tonight when he’s in bed. I’ve been at work so haven’t had a chance yet x

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It’s hard when you’re working and have DC, even harder when their tantrums are so long and so physically draining for both of you.

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