My toddler fell in a pond

[blacksheep2014]

Just that really. Entirely my fault, easter egg hunt with my DSDs at their mums house, me in charge of toddler by proximity, he's 2.5. He was in up to his shoulders by the time i made up the three steps between us. He didn't swallow any water as his mouth didn't go under, he's been bathed twice since and continued about his day demanding chocolate, playing, having a nap and generally acting like nothing happened.

Anyone who's had a near miss able to give me any tips to stop the internal shaking? 15 year career in childcare, I can't actually believe it, keep replaying it in my head. And also, goes without saying but be careful, I reckon my eyes were off of him for 1.5 seconds, i saw him, shouted 'DS wait!' He said wait back to me and then stepped right in.

It’s horrible but baby and toddler swimming often feature dunking them right under so I wouldn’t worry about that!

Not sure if this helps, but I fell in a pond as a toddler I was playing with a cat in the neighbours garden. I'm not sure how supervised I actually was but it will of likely been from from a kitchen window (this is years ago). I was fine, I can't actually remember much but I have fond memories of both the cat and the neighbours so can't be too scarred. My mum on the other hand still mentions it now. Your child sounds fine, try put it behind you and enjoy Easter 🐣

My cousin did this at our Granny’s house when I was a kid.

A high percentage of child drownings happen in ponds. But this wasn’t one of them because you grabbed your child within seconds.

And you responded rapidly and your child is fine. Well done.

Don't give it anymore thought OP. On holiday once, I took my eyes off of my 3 year old to grab sun tan lotion out of my bag (approx 3 seconds) and he ended up being knocked into a swimming pool. Thankfully he'd been having lessons for a while and actually could swim. He was fine.
Also, my friend and I took our DCs to feed the ducks. I was walking on ahead with my DS and my friend was behind. Her DD slipped into the river. Pretty deep but she was fine. No big deal.
It happened to me when I was 4. Stopped straight onto a pool cover and went straight under. You were there and he was fine and you'll be hyper vigilant next time he's near water. These things teach us 😀

Yes, this.

Sounds like excellent parenting to me - you were supervising saw the danger, reacted and nothing bad happened

You were watching him, you caught him.

I had one daredevil here and we joke that he’s used up at least 9 lives. There are some incidents that still leave me shaken inside. Tumbling down a staircase backwards, suddenly running in front of a car, jumping into a deep swimming pool while I was occupied with the baby . 😱

You’ll think about it less and less but those moments stay with you for ever.

My DS fell/stepped into a pond at a similar age because it was covered in algae and he thought it was grass. We still laugh about it now. Bless him he got a shock (as did I) but no harm no foul.

OP be kind to yourself. All is fine. You were supervising which is why not only did you get to him immediately you also managed to shout out a warning before hand. If it's any consolation I fell in a canal as a small child and my parents didn't even notice, some random man pulled me out then shouted at my parents.

Maybe try playing some awareness games with DS where you shout "stop" and he stops immediately? Rope other adults or older kind in to play (a bit like musical statues) and practice it on regular occasions. Always helpful to be able to control them with your voice alone, bit like a dog.

My eldest fell in a pond age 4/5. We were feeding the ducks, he decided to walk a few feet up to another group. I was with DD18 monthsish.
I said " be careful DS, the gras is overgrown, you wont know where the edge is!"
"Yes I will! "
Splash!

5/6 adults around us and not one came to see if I needed help with 2 small kids, one of which was in a pond as I tried to figure out how to retreive him without her falling in!

DS fell into a pond when he was 3 - I turned away for no more than a second. He had a big light-up plastic ring on (this was the 1980s) which he kept held above the surface, so he was easy to see and haul out. No ill-effects, he’s in his thirties now and going strong. Don’t beat yourself up OP.

I fell in the river the other week when I was out walking the dog. I’m 41. Accidents happen! He’s all
good and no harm done!

My nearly 30 year old son was pushed into a swimming pool strapped in his buggy aged 2 by friends 4 year old ! We were a bunch of Mums at friends house with a pool . Everyone thinking that others were watching. Big lesson for all of us. Son was ok but he did go under water and we grabbed him very quickly.
Son and the older child are travelling around Oz ,no hard feelings from son !

You were in the right place and did the right thing OP. You made the difference.

When my DS was small, my PILs had not just a pond as such, but a bloody deep pool that they kept fish in. FIL had constructed it himself and it was outside their back patio, and the garden fell away so there was a garage underneath, then lawn, and very easy for it to be a deep space, so he made it bloody 8 feet deep! From the time DS could move at all, I watched him like a hawk, and mostly forbade him to play outside on his own. I knew that if he fell in we wouldn’t even be able to see him. He never did (luckily he was the type to listen, and to be diverted to other things); but over the years I resented my PILs for that because they never ever made any effort to cover it or put a grill or something over the top - as if the bloody fish were more important. I wonder if they saw the danger. Made me furious! (I didn’t feel we could say anything directly because it was PIL’s creation… but how can people be so blind?)

You lot are brilliant. I've eaten some food that wasn't chocolate for the first time today and started to calm down a bit. Thank you to everyone who has taken time to offer their thoughts, love the idea of some games around awareness and voice commands! Will definitely try that x

Given his mouth didn't even go under, you need to reframe this as an absolutely hilarious story. You weren't being neglectful; you were close enough that you were three steps away from him. You have done nothing wrong here, and everyone is fine.

Mine ran into a table told, she’s 3 in a couple weeks. Accidents happen when you’re right there it’s a difficult pill to swallow, she’s got an awful bruise but we applied first aid right away etc it’s ruined my day and I feel awful about it.

My da1 was playing in a paddling pool aged 3. I had ds2 who was 1 with me and never took my eyes off ds1 but he still fell and couldn’t get up.

It felt like time stood still and there were others around him but no
one even noticed. I rushed in carrying ds2 and scooped him up. He was fine but I was a sobbing mess and I still think about it nearly 20 years later. On another trip ds2 shut ds1’s finger in the toilet door on Brighton Palace pier, that ended with a trip to A&E! I’m amazed I ever went anywhere with them after that😂 There was blood everywhere and pier staff were worse than useless!

You move on from these things but you never forget. It’s scary but you dc is fine and that’s thanks to you being vigilant💐

If it makes you feel better, I once crawled into a swimming pool and sank like a stone at about 9 months old. Apparently, my parents stared at me in horror for about 5 seconds before my 11 year old sister dived in and saved me.

He's fine give yourself a break. I know you feel guilty but you have no reason to, let it go.

Don’t beat yourself up, this wasn’t poor parenting it was an accident that you were immediately there to help with, it’s not as if no one noticed until he was in the pond or it took you 20/30 seconds to get to him he fell and you were right there to pick him back up x

Also un phased and still clutching the pond egg tells you everything you need to know 😂

Did you ever say you were worried about it? Your PILs may not have realised it was a problem, in the past people really didn't understand safety issues the way we do.

I'm another member of the Falling Into Ponds As Toddlers club. My main memory of it is being utterly distraught because I had been wearing a dress that was my absolute favourite and my mum insisted that I take it off and change into something dry. That felt like a bigger injustice than my unexpected dunking.

In short it was fine, I was fine and still to this day have a love of water.