After school routine for Reception age kid - feeling a bit clueless

[OnTheJourneyOnwards]

Pick up time is 3:15pm, we drive home and are generally home by 4pm.

And then I’m like… winging it until bedtime.

I honestly don’t know how to make an after school routine that fits in reading, homework, dinner, bath, bedtime 🙈

I think bedtime is probably too late, DD is down by 8/8.30pm but sometimes it’s closer to 9pm if she’s got homework and needs a hair wash (she’s a curly haired girl so her hair routine takes ages!).

On top of that I really want to cut down screen time, but we’ve fallen into the routine of tv after school.

Please help me get back on track!!

What time do your Reception aged kids (5yo) go to bed and what’s your after school schedule like?

Please be kind 💜

Yes your homework level is crazy the teachers setting all that,it sounds like it will put her off reading and maths for life!never make reading or maths a chore it should be fun and exciting so cut it out completely if it's making her scream and tell the school it's not working.have a break from it and rethink it after easter.practice tricky words by making a game of it by writing the words in chalk and her run to it etc,practical fun learning.
Our routine is generally kind of
Snack at pick up
Park/outdoor play after-school (she needs it)
Cebebeeies while I cook tea
Tea
Bath
School Reading and stories in bed
Lights out about 7.

Routine for my reception child:

3pm Pickup (I prepare a sandwich to eat in the car)
3.30 Homework as soon as we get home (we get reading/homework everyday)
4pm Free time (play)
5pm Dinner (read a story to avoid screen time)
5.45 Bath time
6pm Bedtime story and wind down
6.45 Usually asleep by then
7pm I get back to work, responding to emails etc.

We shampoo once a week after swimming (adds 10 mins to bath time given all the curls) but use conditioner in-between when needed.

That’s a lot of homework!

I find the stretch from school pick up to bed time a slog too, though definitely agree with PP that it’s easier with the better weather and being able to be outside.

We’ve got a no screen time in the week rule going at the moment - it crept in again recently but honestly it just seems to make everything else much harder work so have gone back to this rule, means I need to think a bit more about it all and ensure I’ve got ideas up my sleeve (as DD does NOT do independent play well however hard we’ve tried to encourage it) - but I do find it pays off at bedtime/ makes mealtimes easier too.

We do something like

3-15 pick up. Usually plays/ chats to friends for 10 mins or so then we walk home.

3.40 home. Snack and a drink/ chat. Homework done in this time (just reading book, some days we’ll do some phonics or tricky word practice or play a number game but mainly it’s the reading)

From 4 - Play, outside if possible. Helpfully there’s lots of similarly aged kids in the road and when the weather is nicer there will usually be a few playing out so we go out. Always with parents supervising but we might take it in turns to watch the others for ten mins so you can run in and put tea on! Otherwise if DH is around (if on early shift) he’ll kick a ball around the garden or do Lego/ magnetic blocks with her.

5 ish - Dinner

After dinner some kind of calmer, usually indoor play - she likes to play schools so we sneak a bit more ‘homework’ in there, or we’ll do a board game or play with her peg boards or puzzles etc.

We start the bath and bedtime routine anytime from 6, she’s usually down by 6.45/7 - it’s getting a little later in the last couple of weeks but honestly she’s up at the crack of dawn whatever we do - 5 is usual - so she does need the earlier bedtime.

I actually wrote it down and stuck it to the fridge as I found that helped both of us!

All that said, one night a week she had dance class at 5-5.30 then we eat afterwards so everything gets pushed back, and sometimes we’ll just go to the park for an hour or so straight after school, or the library if we didn’t get there at the weekend. So not set in stone.

An hour of hmk is way too much at that age. Does school know you suspect autism? because a behaviour chart doesn’t sounds appropriate for her at all.

Have you spoke to the SENCO and are you seeking assessment?

Homework for a reception child is ridiculous. Ten minutes of reading and a bed time story from a proper book would be better. It is such a long day for a reception child. I used to feed mine when we got home, let them play for a bit, quick bath and ready for bed, then reading and story with a drink of milk and another snack if they wanted. Teeth brushing and In bed by 7.30 at the latest with some soothing music or a story tape (pre-internet/CD/other technology) they would be asleep in 10 minutes.

We do
2pm snack (not in Uk)
homework (20 minutes of reading, 10 minutes spelling and comprehension and 10 of maths)
TV for 20 minutes if we have time
3:30 out for hobby
5:30 dinner
6ish onwards play
7pm bath time and reading (read to)
8pm bedtime

We try to never do any work on weekends and if we pick up something extra then we just drop the reading etc for that day.

I worked school hours when mine were in reception. After pick up we would go to the park next door, or stay in the school playground for 45 mins or so. Slowly walk home. Then a short play, Lego type stuff, before an early dinner at 5:00. Then we’d watch a little bit of CBeebies - in the night garden and then upstairs for bath and bed. At that age mine couldn’t have waited any time past 5:00 for dinner. And they were ready to go to sleep by 6:30. School exhausted them!

We don't do homework on a night. Possible SEN here too, trying to do stuff that requires brain focus after a day at school just causes meltdowns and arguments. DD reads her school book the 3 mornings I take her to school a week.

I can’t tell if you’re joking or not (I’m sure you are).

Crikey that is a lot of homework!

Our routine was home 3.20
Go and cook pasta or rice for whatever main meal.
Bring it in after 20 mins.
Find daughter asleep 🤣😭

Then wonder what to do!

Even if awake and eaten, bedtime was always by 7oclock.

I always had a snack tray laid out and some sort of craft set up for walking in the door. Nothing fancy, would cobble both the snack and the craft activity together in a couple of minutes on my lunch break or before I left in the morning if I was in the office

This would refuel and reset, then we’d do learning. After that would be free play whilst I sorted dinner then bedtime routine with bath

My Reception age child goes to the childminders 3 days a week after school but on a Monday he is home with no afternoon activities so generally it's play (outside if poss) until they (him and younger DC) get hungry, then tea, then play some more then reading at 6.30 ish then TV for 30-60 mins then bed. I often put an activity outside on the tuff tray, playdough or water usually. On a Thursday we have swimming so it's home for half an hour where they play and snack, then leave for swimming at 4 then home again by 5.30 where it continues the Monday routine.

Another ND child here, it's basically evolved over time but it's basically home about 4pm, wash hands and "dinner" (which is usually bread or cereal as he can't cope with anything complicated) until 4.45pm, then tidy table and toilet, then after all that it would be about 5.30pm so it's clean teeth and change into pyjamas. If he's managed all that and there's time he can play until 6.30pm then it's reading together until 6.45pm and he usually falls sleeper about 7.30pm.
There has to be ridiculous amounts of time built in for everything because it's like the Monty python sketch about an argument, so there needs to be time to disengage and not get stressed and tiredness makes it worse so all the demands are front loaded.
I did try having picnics on the way home last autumn, to try to make the meal part work better, but it didn't seem to make much difference but I might restart it now it's getting warmer.
Good luck, and you can ask your child to help you plan the evening routine, as long as your boundaries are met.
Also, don't sweat the homework. My son will do anything but what he's supposed to, do having a set homework is just going to be stress all round. The teacher outlined the idea behind it eg writing sentences with full stops, so I just made my own less formal activities.
Good luck, it's not easy!