Easter Egg hunt & only child

[harveythehorse]

Every year we host an Easter Egg hunt in the garden . . . and most years it's been DD (who is now 11) on her own, with us and a few of her Uncles and Aunts (none of whom have children over the age of 4 months) scooting around after her and cooing. It's been very sweet but I'm aware it's really bloody sad that she doesn't have cousins and siblings to chase around the lawns with to find chocolate. I was unable to have any more children and I don't know whether it's that, or a very real sense that she's missing out on key moments that makes me think I am being a really shit mum?? By happenchance, we've had friends on Easter Sunday before and she's had a wild time. . . . but it isn't possible to make that happen each year. I've just failed really, haven't I?

No you haven't failed!

At 11 years of age it's time to knock the easter egg hunt on it's head anyway.

Can you make it more challenging and put some of the more keen relatives into teams? Cryptic clues etc. Make it more adult?

It is what it is, you can't change things now and there are going to be advantages for her too.

I have an only and never once considered her missing out at Easter! We have Easter egg hunts, just because they are not frantic doesn’t mean they are not fun. Are you making a problem out of something your daughter isn’t even considering??

I used to do a hunt with ‘cryptic’ clues for my only. When we moved house when she was 4 I found an egg she had never got to.

I grew up with a brother and never had an eater egg hunt.

No easter egg hunt here at 11.
We do the ones around the cathedral, steam train and places like that if our 11 yo wants to.
Never had any as a child. Not a trauma.

I would say no, you have not failed at all! Tbh I’ve never done the whole Easter egg hunt at home thing. If we’ve done one, it’s been an organised event one out somewhere where there’s plenty of kids running about.
Has your daughter ever commented on it? Your daughter knows no different. 🙂

Why does she need a sibling to enjoy an Easter egg hunt?

Like people have said, make the clues more challenging and send her of on a circuit around the area, ending at home.

Really? My then 13 and 16 year old still did it last year.

I never did an Easter egg hunt till I was 23 and I was invited back to my boyfriend (now DH's) house and they did one for his nieces and nephews. I've never felt like I have missed out on a key childhood moment.

We do Easter egg hunts now for our two and almost every year one child ends up in tears. Not sure what kind of memories they are forming! I'm sure your child has other lovely things in their life they will look back on. This doesn't need to be a "thing"

11? Time to stop!

I only have one OP. I chose just to have one for several reasons. Would you say I had failed by not providing a sibling too? I’d hope not, because that would be unkind. Be kinder to yourself OP, you haven’t failed. Your daughter is loved.

No you’ve definitely not failed! How about going to an Easter egg hunt at a national trust or hosting a pre- Easter egg hunt with her friends?

Can you invite her mates round?

i hate the chaos of multiple
children scrambling for eggs. If I had multiple children the eggs would be color coded or marked in some way

dd loves her egg hunts and won’t give them up. Egg dying and an egg hunt are the only things we do for easter. We now just hide the eggs really well and take a photo of every hiding spot. We learned that after the year where we didn’t find everything. It took 2 subsequent easters to finally discover them all.

I really don't understand what siblings have to do with whether or not a child enjoys an Easter egg hunt. I don't see anything sad about any of the situation you describe either. Just enjoy the hunt together.

We have an "only"

Every Easter Saturday DC spends some time with dad helping to make up some difficult clues for me to solve, and some time with me making up some difficult clues for dad to solve, and dad&I make some age-appropriate clues for DC. I remember in the few years in the runup to 11+ exams using nonverbal reasoning puzzles to spell out the name of the location of the big egg. Before reading age there was a trail around the house of cluesin plastic egg cases (accompanied by a mini egg) which each just had a picture of the next location.

My Mum was an only, she longed for siblings. When she had us (I'm the eldest of 4) she was horrified to discover that siblings fight (as adults we get on well). My 3DC are 17, 15 and 12 and there are still always tears at things like Easter Egg Hunts by whoever finds their eggs last.

I would say at 11 she might be getting a little bit old to have the aunts and uncles cooing over her, however next year the current 4 month old will be a toddler and your DD can help that child find the eggs and you'll no longer have to worry about her doing an easter egg hunt on her own.

I guess 11 would be a good age to start making the egg hunts trickier, clever clues, riddles etc. Once the littlies start racketing around, she’ll likely love that if she’s close with them, being a little mother hen with them doing their egg hunt.
Between me and my siblings, we have 7 kids, aged from babies to 10, and it’s bloody chaos. Sort of lovely happy chaos I suppose but chaos nonetheless. There are pros and cons to every set up. You certainly haven’t failed in any way at all on the basis of a slightly more chilled Easter egg hunt!

Honestly, as someone who does have a sibling, I think I would have loved this! Having so much individual attention from all those adults and nobody to squabble, compete or have to share with sounds great.

My DD is an only child, she’s 8, I do a hunt in the house and she loves it. I’ve never felt she’s missing out not having siblings to do it with and she gets all the eggs to herself! Good ideas on here for using cryptic clues as she gets older.

I had an only child. We always did an easter egg hunt into teens but we did it on our own without spectators.

First I hid eggs round the house for her, then she did the same for me.

Being an only myself, I don’t get the ‘racing round with other children’ bit as never did it.

My family had a game that for the little eggs, they were scattered on the lawn (if it was dry enough; indoors otherwise), while the person hunting was blindfolded. They then had to find as many as they could by crawling about, in three minutes. For the last few, and for the big egg, a little bell would be rung to guide them in the right direction.

I think maybe you are feeling sensitive about being unable to have another child and projecting this a little. I was an only child till 8 and never cared that I was hunting for eggs alone. Also I have 2 children and all they do is squabble about who has the most eggs. Presumably your dd goes to school where she will have friends, socialise, learn how to communicate and fit in with her peers. She also benefits from more one on one time with you as a parent. There's no right or wrong number of children. If you still have some sadness about this it might be worth exploring that and trying to make some peace with it.

Easter egg hunt is not a key moment. I’m an only child, never had an Easter egg hunt in my life, never gave it a second thought. You’re overthinking this massively.