Eyesight/autismin 8 week old

[Glenss]

Baby boy is 7weeks5 days old and we had our check this morning with the GP.
when she was checking his eyes she was worried about his lack of eye contact and has referred him to an eye specialist. She said he can see as she could see him looking around the room but said her concern is that his eyesight might not be as good as we would like. I asked if it isnt his eyesight what could it be, and she said “possibly a very early sign of autism”!
Obviously i was so shocked and i cant stop crying worrying that he is either blind or autistic and im constantly looking at everything he does for signs.
He isnt laughing yet or answering to his name. He is starting to smile, but constantly flaps his arms.
i dont really know the point of this just reassurance i guess

I ma in no way am expert in autism at all but I simply cannot believe that no eye contact at 7 weeks old would be an indicator. I don't even know what she contact at 7 weeks old looks like to be honest.

I should have said she wanted him to follow her finger or her torch with his eyes and he wouldnt

He could have an eyesight problem or he might have just not want to perform that day.

He isnt laughing yet or answering to his name. He is starting to smile, but constantly flaps his arms
i dont really know the point of this just reassurance i guess

^ He's 8 weeks old. This is complete normal for 8 week old babies.

7 week old or 7 months?

I see several 8 week old babies a week, as PP says this is normal. I get a smile out of some of them, but definitely no laughing and not recognising their name. I don't tend to get eye contact either and while I understand the GP's concerns and am glad you're being referred, baby may just have been tired. Please try not to stress about this.

I don't know about the eyesight but a 8 week old is not expected to laugh or to answer to it's own name. They have limited control over own body at this age so flapping arms also very normal.

Only 7 weeks!

Thank you

Thank you, this does reassure me

Agree with all of this.

Ok, you're a new mum, you're anxious, your GP is an idiot (sympathies) - to a certain degree that gives you a pass to be treated with kindness. It does not give you a pass to be ignorant.

Your baby is hopefully, and likely - fine. The choices are to get a second opinion, (from someone more knowledgeable about infant development than your GP) further investigation now or wait and see.

Also look upon it as an opportunity for learning. I'm neurodivergent, as are my children (a mix of ADHD and autism) I can assure you at no point have I sat around crying about it. We are perfectly fine thank you. There are many, many posts on mumsnet almost identical to this - the only thing that disables me and my children is this ableist attitude - it stinks. ( Not undermining other ND individuals who are disabled by their condition - we are all different - surprise!) Sorry to pick on you OP - but honestly WTF is wrong with people? Seriously I read this stuff on here every day and struggle to accept that I'm the weird one.

If that doesn't make sense how about I post the following 'My GP flagged up an issue with my baby - there's a possibility he might turn out like the OP. I've been crying all day - help'

And the autistics lack empathy? Look again folks.

All the best OP and try not to worry. Your baby will likely be fine, if not they might turn out to be the coolest person you know.

My 14 week old granddaughter has only just started reliably smiling and giving a little giggling noise.

Doctor is doing their job but try not to worry.

That's a bizarre response from the health visitor. At my son's 6 week check, he didn't focus on / track the mobile that the HV had on the ceiling. But she wasn't worried when I said he did track other things at home.

If he's looking at stuff around the room, maybe your DS just wasn't interested in the pen. Or was tired. Or about to poop. Or something. Suggesting he might be autistic sounds preposterous tbh.

He probably isn’t either blind or autistic, but honestly:
Some people are blind.
Some people are autistic.
In neither of these situations is it a tragedy.
My best friend from college is blind. She is also a professor, happily married, mother of two, well travelled and has loads of friends and hobbies.
Some of the coolest, most interesting people I know are autistic. My son is autistic. It’s not particularly easy but it’s what it is.
The hard bit for you at the moment is not knowing what if anything is up but honestly, however it turns out you will be fine. Wishing you all the best x

@Whatismypasswordthen
Im not ignorant to neurodiversity at all. My brother is 33yo no verbal autistic, along with other issues and is unable to live independently. Thats my worry for my child that I am allowed to have because I have seen how hard life has been for him and my parents. Luckily for you, autism hasnt affected your family in this way

I have 2 boys with autism and their eye contact when they were younger was spot on! At 7 weeks the lack or presence of eye contact is imo no way related to autism.

X post.
That sounds really hard and no wonder you are upset.
However don’t forget many autistic people don’t have that degree of disability; if he turns out to be autistic it doesn’t mean his life will be the same as your brother’s.

Just read your update OP, yes that's tough. I've been reading a fair bit on ableism - including internalised ableism which I recognise in myself to a degree. We all cope with what life throws at us, what breaks people is the way they're treated by others. No-one wants to be regarded as the worst case scenario - no-one, regardless of their disability.

Sorry but this is completely uncalled for. Yes the OP is a new Mum who has been told her baby will need a referral, it’s worrying. You said she should be treated with kindness then did the opposite.

I have worked with young people and families in various contexts that I will not go into here, before you start questioning my experience. Your experience is your experience, if your children have struggled as a result of their neurodivergence then that is brilliant but generally they do, there isn’t enough SEND support in schools or society in general and this makes life even more difficult for them than it needs to be. Of course neurodiverse children can live happy and fulfilled lives but to not understand why someone would be worried about their child having ASD is ridiculous. An example, my friends son has both ASD and ADHD he is a wonderful artist and a talented musician having self taught both piano and guitar. However he struggles at school due to lack of support and that the school environment generally he does not enjoy, it is okay to recognise that he has these struggles and I would be worried for my child.

Wow, that's a lot of words you've put in OP's mouth.

7 weeks seems extraordinarily young for a doctor to suggest autism. I am staggered by that.

Was the doc aware that you have ASD in the family? Just wondering if they jumped to their conclusion based on that - and wanted to get the ball rolling asap as they know there is an incredibly long wait for assessment.

You are allowed to be upset worrying that your child might have a disability, having a disability makes life harder and who would want that for their child? And I say that as the mother of a fantastic teen with ASD that I wouldn't change for the world.

I’d put in a complaint about the GP. It’s not their place to suggest a seven week old baby is autistic especially when based on one possible symptom that it isn’t a guaranteed sign of neurodivergence.

An eye specialist won’t deal with, or diagnose, autism and someone with autism is no more likely to be partially or completely blind as anyone else.

And all of this: He isnt laughing yet or answering to his name. He is starting to smile, but constantly flaps his arms is perfectly normal for his age. Not all babies can smile at his age either (one of mine couldn’t).

Well I’m pleased that you never sat crying about it. The fact that the GP mentioned Austim would get most people anxious.

Hopefully OPs little one will be fine but as you know, ASD is a spectrum and some people with it can’t speak. No one can know how their child will develop but every one wants their child to be ok.

I say this as the parent of a DC who is ND and they struggle. If I could take the struggles away I would.

I do think the GP is an idiot though as the baby is 7 weeks not 7 months and has caused unnecessary worry

I don’t believe anywhere in the U.K. would accept a referral for a seven week old to be assessed for autism.

Hi just wondering how your little one is doing now? My baby is 8month old and going through test for things similar to your concerns I noticed something different in him around 6 week old but I waited till a month ago to speak to gp has I know ever child develops different. Did wye specialist see you? Has your baby started tracking and following better now?