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Original poster

Do babies need dummies? Or can they forego

112 replies

amberbamber98 · 09/12/2020 13:03

Me and DF are TTC, in month 2 and of course as time goes on I wonder about little things about parenting!

One thing I did wonder is if babies have to have dummies?

I never thought of this really! But it was a random thought that crossed my head

DH has 2 nephews, 1 was given one and still has it at 18 months. His parents say they regret it as it’s made his teeth grow a certain way (don’t know anything about this just what they said) and delayed and affected his speech? Just as he’s always had one and is quite adamant to not give it up

His other nephew is 4 and never had one they never used one and they’re set on the fact that dummies cause teeth and speech/language issues

I didn’t really think of this as me and my brother never had dummies my mother said! DF had one apparently until he was 5

So does it really affect teeth/speech and language? And can babies go without it?

Or do they need it at one time or another!

OP posts:

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SliceOfBlueberryPieForYou · 09/12/2020 14:48

Hate them. DS2 had one until he was 4 . What you think you will do before having a baby and what you might actually do when you are SO exhausted are two different things!

But seriously, I would wait and see. The decent ones are not cheap and they will get lost, so if you don't need one, great.

BTW babies like to suckle for more than food. It's also about comfort and bonding. Look up "responsive feeding" which can be done for both breast and bottle fed babies.

twinklespells · 09/12/2020 14:51

I would have used one if it helped. DD is a dummy refuser. I don't understand why people are so against them, there is research to show they may help reduce the risk of SIDS and I'm sure all parents know they'll have to wean their children off a dummy, just like weaning them off bottles etc.

JumpingJamboree · 09/12/2020 15:01

They can be very useful. My DD had one for about 2 months but then one day she decided she didn't want it anymore. It also coincided with her refusing the bottle on the odd occasion she had expressed milk.
To be honest, I was quite relieved when she started refusing the dummy. She now has a little comforter toy that she likes to chew on to calm her down instead.

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TwoZeroTwoZero · 09/12/2020 15:06

Ds never had one. It wasn't because I was against them; he just wouldn't take one. He found his fingers instead and would constantly suck the middle two fingers on his left hand. He sucked them so much that he made them sore by the time he was 4 and the only way I could get him to break the habit was to tape them up for several days with micropore tape.

My youngest had a dummy. I never realised there were so many different types of teat and found one that was bulbous on the end. We threw it away at around 6 months and never looked back.

GAW19 · 09/12/2020 15:10

I did buy a couple but didn't want DD to have one, she never used them, they are still shoved in the back of a drawer 2 years later. We did give it to her when she was teething but she only chewed the hard plastic part
They defo don't 'need' a dummy.

Harrysmummy246 · 09/12/2020 16:17

@mooncakes

Breastfed babies don't need one, but bottle fed babies do need to comfort suck.

If you get rid of them by about 18 months they are unlikely to cause any problems and do prevent thumb sucking which is much harder to get rid of.

Not that clear cut @mooncakes

Early on, when my milk flow and letdowns were too much for DS, he did find a dummy useful as the boob was not comfort sucking territory. We did away with it by 6 mo though (he was bigger and my boobs had calmed down)

RayOfSunshine2013 · 09/12/2020 16:44

No, they don't have to have one.

Mine did, simply because it keeps them quiet sometimes and everyone has their own views and reasoning on using or not using dummies, but as soon as he turned one it was taken away and never came back. He did scream for the first two nights at bedtime but after that all was forgotten and i had to try hard not to give in.

PontiacBandit · 09/12/2020 16:50

I think they are a godsend, first thing I bought when I got the positive test. They were a comfort at night and I'm convinced it helped them sleep through. I used them at sleep times only and got rid at 3. I prefer them to thumb sucking or mangy blanket.

SMaCM · 09/12/2020 16:54

I didn't want DD to have one ... until we drove from the South of England to Scotland! She only ever had them for car journeys and sleep though.

AurorasGingerbreadHouse · 09/12/2020 17:02

Some of them really do! One of my children never had one, and one of them had one on medical advice.

saraclara · 09/12/2020 17:04

I hated dummies, until my colicky distressed baby went weeks being stressed and upset. The health visitor asked if I'd consider using one. I called my husband, asked him to buy one on the way home from work, and within seconds of putting it in her mouth my baby sighed, her entire body relaxed, and within minutes she was asleep.

She was demand breastfed, but still she needed that sucking. Clearly she couldn't comfort suck without taking too much milk and upsetting her stomach.

She remained a 'sucker' when tired or upset, but I always popped her dummy out as soon as she was content again. I still hate seeing toddlers running around playing, with a dummy in their mouths. At that moment they clearly don't need it.

My second child wasn't remotely interested and didn't need one at all. Babies aren't all the same.

Dyra · 09/12/2020 17:12

I tried to give DD a dummy as she comfort suckles a lot while breastfeeding. She spat it out immediately every time. We gave up shortly after.

We figure unless it produces warm milk, she didn't want to know.

Kiki275 · 09/12/2020 18:20

DS ended up in SCBU where we introduced a dummy to help him settle. He rejected it himself at around 4 months when his teeth came through.
I'd recommend keeping an open mind, remembering it is an option. Baby might not even like them, lots don't x

Shmithecat2 · 09/12/2020 18:26

I WISH my ds had accepted a dummy. He's was ebf and colicky, and suckled for comfort ALL THE TIME. I bought every single type of dummy there was, to no avail, he just wouldn't take one. I was his human dummy.

timeforanewstart · 09/12/2020 18:35

Ifs up to you my first ds had one ds2 wasn't interested both breast fed.
Ds1 gave up dummy quite Easily at 18-20 months but he only had it for sleeping really
My friends little girl wouldn't take a dummy and sucked her thumb and was still doing it at 10 , but others stop sooner . Depends on child and you do whats right for you and your baby

Caterina99 · 09/12/2020 20:27

My DC1 loved his dummy. Slept through the night from 6 months (once he could find his own dummy and put it in) and we took it away when he turned 2. Couple of nights of upset and then he never looked back. No speech or teeth issues.

DC2 wasn’t interested. Slept like crap til she was 2.5. I tried to get her to take one but she just wasn’t into it.

I do hate toddlers and preschoolers wandering around with them all day though! But for babies, yes they can be really helpful

sunmoonsun · 09/12/2020 21:07

I know numerous breastfed babies that have dummies. Saying breastfed babies dont need dummies is rubbish. It depends on the baby, not on the method of feeding.

This times a million!

peasoup8 · 09/12/2020 21:11

I really dislike dummies. Some people use a dummy for medical reasons and that’s completely understandable. But there’s no way I’d introduce a dummy for any other reason other than baby’s health (like keeping them quiet for example).

Basically avoid unless your baby really needs one and if you do use one, make sure your baby is weaned off it between 6-12 months as per the NHS advice. Personally though I would rather wean baby off it nearer 6 months than 12, so it doesn’t start interfering with teeth and speech.

Standrewsschool · 09/12/2020 21:13

Neither of mine had them and I had no problems with thumb sucking etc.

peasoup8 · 09/12/2020 21:17

Oh, and a friend who did give their DD a dummy now has to wake every hour or two during the night to put it back in her mouth, because when she spits it out she wakes up and cries. You have been warned!

Gizmo79 · 09/12/2020 21:18

None of my three ever took to them. Despite trying!

sunmoonsun · 09/12/2020 21:20

I'm grateful now as I don't have to battle with removing it or using it as a sleep aid or worry about potential dental problems

Me too - I was tempted to use a dummy a few times but looking back now, I’m so glad I didn’t.

Chocolatechocolatechocolate · 09/12/2020 21:21

I think it really depends on the baby. Some babies need the comfort/reassurance of sucking, others don’t.

noscoobydoodle · 09/12/2020 21:23

I have 2 DCs who have never needed or wanted a dummy. I also have a DC who did need a dummy and was very late to give it up too (night time only). I was very anti-dummy until DC2 came along and they probably saved my sanity!

daisypond · 09/12/2020 21:23

Mine never had dummies. I don’t know any babies that had them. I think they were rather frowned upon.

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