How would you deal with defiant 2 year old?

[Tinkywinks]

Hi, would be grateful for any advice, just wondering what other mums do in similar situations. My son who is 2 years and 5 months can get defiant at times to the point I have to be physically forceful. A common example which happened this evening and left me feeling really stressed out was that he was in the garden and I kept calling him in as I had to get him in the bath but the answer kept coming back "No!" despite all my tactics. I tried closing the garden door and pretending I was going off inside but he didn't care! I tried to distract him by telling him a story whilst walking him to the door but he cottoned on and threw himself to the floor. I tried to usher him in but he was just digging his heels in even more so I had to literally drag him inside whilst he was kicking and screaming, I lost my temper and found it really physically demanding, and I just end up feeling really drained and annoyed afterwards. What would anyone else do in this situation?I also get this when trying to leave the park and getting him to come to the table to eat his dinner. How do you get a 2 year old to do something they don't want to do?

Or 17 year old even!

my Daughter loved it when I made instructions fun with options.

eg. We are going inside now, are you going to scuttle like a crab or stomp like a T. rex.

Also racing them or challenging them eg. Bet you can’t get to the door before I count to 5? Let’s see if you can beat me to the house 3,2,1…

im still racing and counting to 5,10,20 with my 4 year old!

DC3 is 3 and if anything has got worse...

As well as the tips above, sometimes a bit of planning can help. For example, if you know it's likely to be hard getting them in from the garden is there a part of the evening routine they really like? Can you do that after garden play rather than before as the reward for coming in? For example, pudding after garden play or a bit of TV after garden play. Similarly, when we go out one of my criteria is usually that there is a cafe. The DC get playground / fun activities, I save the cafe for the end as the bribe to get them to leave the playground.

The choices thing mentioned above often helps, as can timers for transition as mentioned above. If you are out even counting down from 10 can help. It's still very hard work though when you have one like that, DC1 and DC2 were a lot easier toddlers!