Abu to be sick of hearing parents whine about school holidays

[Bekstar]

Our kids are about to break up for a weeks school holidays. Me personally I can't wait to spend some proper time with my child. I'm lost when he is at school. Regardless of how well he is behaving I never wish he was back at school.
But what annoys me is the amount of posts on social media lately about how parents are dreading the school holidays, that they can't wait for them to go back etc.
These are your kids, not the teachers, yours, they spend 6 hours a day at school, as it is. But then you begrudge them having a little time to let off steam at home. Personally I had my child because I love kids and although I know school is important for him, I love the holidays and love to spend time with him. Because during school term time I only see him for two hours each night before he is asleep, we don't get much time to do anything and when we do it's normally homework related. Weekends are super busy as it is because it's the only time DS gets to see his grandparents so again we are limited to the time we get to spend together just as a small family. So when school holidays come I'm over the moon, I get to spend quality time with my child. But then I hear parents whine about how there should be less school holidays or that they wish they were back at school, it makes me pity their kids. These are children who have spent every day for weeks on end away from their families, and so what if they are exited and a bit playful because its the holidays. Make the most of it
My mum had 7 of us and still made room for more through the holidays. We always had friends round, cousins stopping etc. Not once did my mum ever complain, she always made sure to spend time with us during school holidays even if it was just over a bit of gardening or playing board games.
Instead of whining about looking after their own children, some parents need to rwalise they brought that child into the world maybe they need to spend some time with them. Don't just leave your child to entertain themselves and then wonder why they fight and squabble or scream and whine. Plan something to do with the that's fun. Enjoy the time with them. They will be back at school before you know it.

Totally agree.
I especially dislike where they're moaning over social media that they need to get pissed but can't because they have a child to look after.

A girl I went to school with complains over facebook that she wants a spray tan but has to buy cupboard food for her daughter.
She gets the spray tan and her daughter goes hungry or to her mom's for to be fed

well said tulips my child is ASD. he hates the holidays and does not want to leave the house, basically he stays home die to anxiety issues and hates the change of routine. a week is ok it is the six week holiday that is difficult. he refuses to go to holiday activities

Not everyone is fortunate enough to have grandparents nearby to spend weekends with.

One child is not necessarily easier because you have to organise more activities and play dates so that they don’t get lonely.

OP how perfect your little family sounds. How sweet.

How vomit inducing. 🤢

Not healthy IMO to feel “lost” when DC are in school.

*Totally agree.
I especially dislike where they're moaning over social media that they need to get pissed but can't because they have a child to look after.

A girl I went to school with complains over facebook that she wants a spray tan but has to buy cupboard food for her daughter.
She gets the spray tan and her daughter goes hungry or to her mom's for to be fed*

You need to get new friends.

“These are your kids, not the teachers, yours”

DC do not BELONG to us. And they don’t require a parent’s presence 24/7. Being educated, most often in a school, is a normal part of child development!

Oh give over. For lots it means having a huge childcare bill or scrabbling round calling in favours or for those with a SAHM it can be relentless - day in and out of #makingmemories on a limited budget.

And for those saying you knew what you were getting into - I thought I had a good idea but the reality is very different. Think of all those ideas you had about raising children before you had kids and how you look back and laugh.

FWIW school hols are much of a muchness for me as I WOH and DH is SAHD and he’s pretty good at getting them out and about. But I’m not so dim witted to think that everyone has the same (or should have the same) experience as me.

I'm a single parent with longstanding MH problems due to my abusive exH (DCs father). I didn't plan any of this when I had the DCs and yes I struggle with holidays.

When I whinge it's lighthearted as I do appreciate how lucky I am to have DCs.

However I do think 'being lost without them' is a bit OTT and you need to reclaim your own identity.

Why would we moan about something that we made a conscious choice to do?

Well, we made a conscious choice to have a child. We ended up with twins. Much as I adore my DC, I reserve the right to moan as much as I bloody well like. Oh, and we have a single remaining grandparent who is nearly 90, a couple of hundred miles away and entirely unsuitable for childcare.

However, I suppose if I had one child and nearby grandparents who were able to help out regularly I might be tempted to come over all sanctimonious and holier-than-thou like OP, and actually I'd rather admit that I quite like being a grown-up who has a business to run and a life aside from her offpsring. HTH

I'm lost when he is at school.

That's very sad and not healthy.

If I had one child who I only saw for 2 hours a weekday, spent time every weekends with grandparents who looked after them well then I would look forward to school holidays too! I only work a couple of days a week. School ends just after 3pm. They typically go to bed just after 8pm, if not later. So we spend at least 5 hours together ever school evening anyway.

I love the threads and the moaning about holidays. Keeps me going . Half term next week is fine but the summer holidays are now on my mind and the thought of 6 weeks of trying to stop them fighting, wrecking the house, spending all our money and keeping them out of too much sun .

Just realised summer holidays are actually over 7 weeks. Happy days. Never mind, I’m sure it will be 7 weeks of #makingmemories and #lovingeveryminute and spending time with #mylittlefamily.

Boak.

You'll hate me then OP, I had a day off work today but I sent my two year old to nursery anyway so I could get some peace and quiet, and it has been total bliss.

In short, yes yabvu.

Oh Christ YABU
I don't work and I adore hanging out with my kids, but I have my limits. 3 solid days is about my limit, they're adorable but I get to the point where if I hear someone whine 'mummmeeee' one more time I will scream. Please god save us from people like the OP who just cherish every minute with their darling kids. Even the nicest kids are annoying after a while.

And holidays where I live are 9 weeks over the summer, so yes, I am strategising how to leave them with grandparents for portions of it to ensure my sanity stays intact

I'm lost when he is at school.

That's pretty tragic.

Why would we moan about something that we made a conscious choice to do?

That goes for most things doesn't it? I choose to work, I love my work, but I also moan about it when I am pissed off with it. I have made conscious decisions to do lots of things, which I might at some point have a bit of a moan about....life isn't black or white.

I love spending time with my kids, I enjoy a lot of the holidays, but it can be very stressful as ds is disabled, and struggles with the lack of routine, and he winds his sisters up, who love him, but don't want him shouting at them to 'play, play, play' all. the. time. Plus we usually have several appointments in the holidays, which make for much juggling of transport etc (I don't drive and dh can't have much time of in the summer....)

So yes, I love the holidays and I will probably post photos of nice things we are doing that will make people ptch and roll their eyes and say, 'hark at her thinking she is some sort of uber mum' !

And yes there will be days where I am tearing my hair out and sticking my head in the wardrobe to scream, and on those days I might post something on social media about getting the kids to help make a crystal meth lab in the kitchen and how that can be a fun wholesome activity on shitty days like this. And I will do that to have a laugh with my friends and try to save my sanity, but I am sure some people will ptch and roll their eyes and say, 'well you chose to have 3 children, suck it up buttercup'

So in a nutshell, you can't do right for doing wrong, and thus it shall ever be.

Ah those dreams of long hazy days in school holidays having soft focus picnics while the children skip merrily together in their white cotton clothes while DP and I laugh together over a salad... I didn't know then the kids would rather bicker constantly while watching inappropriate YouTube videos, trail homemade slime round the house, and never stop asking for food.

Why would we moan about something that we made a conscious choice to do?

I made a conscious choice to become pregnant with a third child. I’m still moaning every one of the 20 times a day that I’m throwing up.

My goodness, OP how judgemental! My husband and I both work full time and live in a very small house. It is a NIGHTMARE organising time off work to be at home with the children for holidays and half terms, and when we are all at home I find it so stressful because there is so little space for everyone, there is no quiet, no privacy and not enough money to go anywhere.

Everyone's situation is different. I cope much better with the normal routine. Glad holidays are just peachy for you. Please use paragraphs in such a long post next time.

You know that moaning about how hard work small kids are doesn't actually equate to regretting having them? It is possible to hold two disparate points of view simultaneously - both that kids are joyful, amusing and life-affirming, AND that they are insanely hard work, infuriating and occasionally very boring. If you have never felt like this, you are either lying to yourself, an emotional robot, or have preternaturally placid children who could do with a bit more chaos in their excessively ordered lives, or...nope, I think that's it actually.

If you genuinely are that perfect,then spend your spare emotional energy developing empathy for people with slightly less perfect existences who might have really good reason to struggle with the holidays, but still love their kids with all their hearts - as much as you, believe it or not. They don't need your smug, cold-hearted pity, and believe me it isn't much good for your soul either.

I am a bit on the fence with this one as for some people holidays are difficult. I do personally struggle with school holidays as me and dh work and ds1 has Autism and adhd so no holiday club will take him, my mum works and my MIL is to wrapped up in her other grandkids plus my FiL is a grandson hating knob so she doesn’t really help either. I have had to take unpaid leave to cover school holidays and hubby has taken some parental leave (it was that or I resigned). To make it harder ds1 hates changes to his routine due to asd so find it really hard unless I have stuff planned everyday.

All that being said I adore my children and love the extra time with ds1 so do wonder why parents who are not working and have no childcare issues complain. Yes I get kids whine at times but get them playing and ultimately kids need the break from school as they get tired.

I did notice you said about your child needing to see grandparents every weekend. It doesn’t do any harm to shut your door and keep your child to yourself some weekends or go away and do what you want with them without seeing grandparents.