Older children with dummies

[Dinoraptor449]

Hi, I am new on here so this is my first post. I have 2 daughters, eldest is 4.5 and the youngest is 3, they both still use dummies. I know you will probably think that I am a crap mum for letting them have dummies this long, but there are not really any problems. We had the dentist check their teeth about a month ago, and he said they were perfect, he couldn't tell they had dummies. The only reason I am worried about this is that I have been getting a lot of comments about it from family members, mainly my mother in law, and my sister in law. They have been telling me that my girls are way too old to be sucking dummies, and the more they tell me that, I start to doubt my decision.

Are they too old to still have dummies?
Should I take them away?

i've gradually come to the view that it depends on when and how they are used. Night time and quiet chill times at home for comfort - then whats the harm if its not affecting teeth.
My bugbear is children that are sucking on them when they are being active and talking - or rather not talking but doing that silly mumble because there's a dummy stuck in their mouth. If the dummy is there they either won't talk because they're sucking or they will not be speaking properly - when I see that I think its wrong and should be taken away.

Just take it off them you'll hear winging for a week and then it'll all be forgotten. No offence but at nearly 5 years old your child shouldn't be using a dummy, they are for babies.

I have decided to let them have the dummies, I have spoken to a few people about it, (family members, dentist,) and they don't have a problem.

DS (3.5) just gave up his dummy - we hadn't intended for him to have it beyond 2 but he is quite intense and the dummy seemed to help him switch off at bedtime (and he was a great sleeper which we were scared to risk!)

We had mentioned dummy fairy etc quite a bit and talked about teeth - but in an unpressured way. If friends' children gave up their dummies we talked about that too. At first he was quite resistant and even started having it more, but over time we cut down to quiet/upset/bedtimes, then just bedtimes.

Then out of the blue he announced he wanted to give all his dummies to the charity shop! First night was awful as they were still in the house, but then we took them to the shop (thank you nice lady for playing along) and he has been fine ever since.

I bought a book called Bea Gives Up Her Dummy which he loves and a little bedtime bear, which he is indifferent to.

Hope some of that is useful to you. I have a sneaky suspicion your younger one will give up first and then the older one won't want hers either! So you could start the encouragement that way round?

I'd cut it down to only in bed now, and then maybe get them to swap them for a present at Christmas.

I know 1 three year old who has her dummy a lot. She sticks out like a sore thumb in my world. Also generally used as a replacement for parenting sat - ie if she is upset in soft play instead or asking what's wrong she gets it shoved in. So I would say it's not the dummy that's the issue per se, but what do they want them for?

Older kids with dummies makes me cringe a bit, same as when I'm out and see a 4 year old with a bottle...but they're your kids, and it's not like you are giving them crack ;) Saying that, I had my dummy until I was 4, so who am I to judge. There is nothing wrong with my teeth either.
There's a girl in my daughter's ballet class, looks about 2 1/2, who has a dummy in permanently. I've never seen her without it. Now that's not good...

I had a dummy til 3, my sisters til 4 and 5. So did most of our cousins. Dummies were normal to us. I was shocked when my own DD had no interest.

OK, 2 of us had braces at a later age, but no speech problems, and I don't remember ever getting grief for it. We just gave them up when we decided they weren't needed anymore.

Worse things in the world than dummies, I agree.

Personally I find this ridiculous. A 4.5 year old should not have a dummy, nor a 3 year old. If they were my children I would throw them in the bin, dummies gone. You need to be stronger, you can't have them at school with dummies.

My dd is nearly six and still has a dummy at home and night time. She manages all day at school without it she has asd and spd though and likes to chew on it rather than it being a pacifier. .

My 4 year old and 2 year old are still complete dummy addicts. I don't have the courage to take them away right now, and they are only for bedtime so what is the harm really?