Any tips for managing to put a reasonable dinner on the table if you both work?

[bumbleweed]

I go back to work part-time next week and can't get my head round how I will be able to get a dinner on the table in time for us to eat before dd's bathtime at 6pm.

I already struggle to cook whilst looking after dd (12m) because she gets so tired and fussy late afternoon. But I want us to be able to sit down and eat as a family as I think it provides a good example to dd for eating healthy food and social skills and is proper family time.

How do you all do it?

btw i have a slow cooker and would struggle to fit in starting the food in the am before getting off to work. i once read it (here on mn) described as a "time shifter rather than a time saver" - and imho that's true.

Yes, I bought a slow cooker before went back to work. Was very depressed when realised you had to do some preparation to meat and stuff before bunging it in! Like that time shifter description bk. Ours is collecting greasy dust on top of kitchen units

BK you prepare it the night before and put in the larder or fridge

Then buy a timer thingy that goes on a plug and set it to come on at the right time

voila!

When I worked 3 days a week this was OK because I cooked more on my days at home and froze stuff or had a bake ready in the fridge for Weds night etc. Also DH works from home some days so on those days he prepares dinner during the day.

However ds eats at about 5pm at the child minder so doesn't need a full meal when he gets home so we don't often eat together in the evenings anyway.

Since being back at work 4 days a week and having a few weeks where dh is not home much at all I have given up all pretence at trying to eat with ds in the evenings . It is too stessful.

I walk in the door with ds at 6.15pm and I spend the next 1-1.5 hrs getting him ready for bed and chilling out. We may have a small snack together if either of us is hungry. Then after ds is in bed I eat something quick and then I sort out stuff for the next day.

I hasten to add that I cook all ds's food at the childminder so for instance this Sunday I cooked pumpkin risotto, Shep pie, chicken escalopes and meatballs - all to be frozen in small portions for ds to eat in the week. That was in addition to cooking our normal meals for the weekend which we all eat together which are not always the same as I cook for ds because dh is vegetarian.

I figure already cook ds's food for every day (lunch and dinner) and I have to fit it in my 3 days off a week so any more stress is just too much.

My advice would be to eat together as much as you can and not stress about when you can't. one other thing is when ds was 12 month old he was regularly asleep by 6.30/7pm so even a bath was too much most evenings when I worked. He just had a quick wash, pyjamas, teeth and bed - if I tried to make him stay up longer he would go into meltdown. Now he's a bit older that is less of a problem.

Have resisted it for that precise reason bk. Pyrex and oven timer are as good as it gets here, otherwise if it won't go in our microwave, saute or grill pan it doesn't get cooked Monday to Friday.

but cd it says very specifically in the instructions that stuff must go into it hot - so you would need to (believe me i have thought this through! ) (1) make everything the night before then (2) heat it up in an ordinary casserole in the am before transferring it to the slow cooker. i think that is a step too far for me!

I have a slow cooker pan that will go on the stove top so can just transfer it no problems. Also I regularly add cold items to it and it works OK.

maybe i will try it cold then - but i'm scared of things not cooking properly... food poisoning...

Hmm - quite often the cold things I add are veg. But I am sure I have been known to with meat. I have even been known to brown the meat, stick it in the fridge overnight, then stick the slow cooker on from cold. I think maybe you do not want to be taking advice from me. However I am fairly sure that you would be OK adding cold veg.

I think there is some debate about slow cookers. Many will say that meat should reach a certain core temperature to be safe, and with a slow cooker it may not reach that temperature unless it goes in hot. But many will also say that you shouldn't eat your steaks rare and your egg yolks runny. Personally, I definately wouldn't worry about slow cooking beef at low temperatures. I read about a number of top restaurants getting in to trouble with health and safety over some of their slow cooked dishes - recipes, it has to be said, that have been followed in France for over a hundred years.

we don't mange to eat en famille in the week. DS eats a big lunch at nursery , and has "tea" there too, and then has a portion of spag bol or tortellini (2 minutes - superb) or spag hoops on toast depending on what he's had for lunch. DH and I eat later. We eat togther for breakfast everyday amd lunch on Saturday and Sunday, plus he has lunch with me on non-nursery days. I agree that eating togther is important, but feel the communal eating thing at nursery has already helped him a lot. Although did have major tantrum about refusing to sit up at table last night. I think also there is an element of DH and I needing some time - it can be stressful when they refuse to eat or throw it around - ds does not do this often, but I prefer to eat my meal in peace. I always save a portion of what we have one night to freeze or serve for DS to have the next day or later in week. my favourite last week was mushroom risotto. First time DS had had it. Him - "What's that?" me "it's a vegetable" Him, knowingly -"i don't like mushrooms do I?" me "this is a special type called porcini from Italy" whereupon he goes off on why they are called porcini and how they get to London from Italy, all the while spooning mushrooms in merrily. Distraction tactics are my fave. Sorry that's a bit off point. But it was a dinner DH and I had enjoyed the night before that DS liked the next day.

Smug parent alert. I was actually asked by nursery if we ate as a family due to my 1yos exemplary table manners.

We always eat together and they ahev terible table manners LOL!

If baby gets fractious, feed her or have her fed early on, and then sit her at the table with the two of you with some nibbles while you eat; you don't want to be dealing with a fractious abby, working and eating.

Great - so many replies, suggestions, sensible advice too

Okay so leave it a couple of weeks to get back into being at work (huge difference). Good idea.

Yes I think you are right, it doesnt matter if we dont eat together every day. I have decided this afternoon while pondering the whole issue that on days when dd doesnt get her afternoon nap, I'm just going to offer her a light tea on her own and get her to bath/bed early and we can eat later. On other days, when not too whingey she can stay up and eat with us at 6pm ish and go in bath bit later.

I must get into this cooking extra and freezing malarky. I have little spurts and then dont manage it again for ages.

Thanks for all the carnivorous recipe suggestions, but oops I forgot to mention I'm one of those weird lentil-munching veggie types. Presumably you can do vegetable / bean dishes in a slow cooker? Anyone know any good recipes?

I had never thought of using the oven timer for jacket spuds or for cooking defrosted meals.

I think I need to spend the weekend doing some cooking, and have a weekly menu plan - I have read on here before that people do that and I have not managed to get that organised even yet.

Actually atm DD is a nightmare after nursery. We need to eat then because of DS who does not get fed otherwise, and DD who has nursery tea insists on having the same as us but has tantrums about which spoon, which cup, where she sits etc.

You can make chilli with more beans and lentils instead of mince. You can make veggie lasagne, freeze and reheat. Delia's veggie shepherd's pie and reheat.