Attachment parenting

[Cherubs]

Are there any others on mn?
I have been looking into the benefits of ap and co-sleeping recently and it seems to make alot of sense although hes now sleeping at odd times and for shorter periods.
I don't practice ap all the time as ds1 still needs the buggy board, but when we are going out I carry him 50% of the time and at home its pretty much all the time.
I was wondering other ap'ers what carriers do you use?
What benefits do you see by carrying?
Has anyone ap'd with one child but not with others? And did you notice a difference?

Yet another 'more by accident than design' attachment parenter checking in I've co slept on and off (mostly on but a few phases of ds starting the night in the moses basket or cot - I really feel for you dinosaur as I had the same worries about cosleeping when ds was tiny - inspired by a horrible and in hindsight and imho biased feature on 'this morning' ), used to use the babybjörn and then huggababy sling loads until a couple of months ago but i think I've got weaker now I don't look after him full time and also suck grapes in the supermarket to try to get pesticides off them before giving them to him but think this is more to do with me being a marginally dishonest greb than an APer

For Papillon, have you thought about a bedside cot. I got mine when ds was about 8 months old and it is by far my favourite piece of baby equipment - surpasses totsbots and huggababy so must be good . Imo it combines the best of both worlds (and I don't flog the things, honest) as you get a bit of space to sprawl/cuddle dp/dh but are also close to baby and can bf without moving them so much easier. We got it as once ds could crawl he used to sort of sleep crawl out of bed at night or during naps - luckily our bed is v low but it was still disturbing.In our old house ds used to nap fine on a futon when newborn but personally I would not like him to be on one while mobile but devoid of sense (please tell me this phase ends!) especially in another room as I would'nt be able to relax not knowing what he was up to.

Re. your friend - well I've not really got any advice for her as we're in the same position really, although it doesn't bother me at all that ds still bfs to sleep (ds is 17 months). Only thing that worries me is chance of tooth decay from night feeding so try to limit sweet things and clean teeth well - easier said than done though and don't think I succeed here. Does it bother your friend or does she just think that she ought not be bfing to sleep now her baby's older? Think I might try to tackle it (no idea how tbh) if ds is still doing it in a year or so but am sticking my head in the sand for now and enjoying all the cuddles. Apparently I just spontaneously stopped bfing and slept through at 20 months so I'll see if ds does it in his own time. On the other hand I am very lucky that I can go out (to uni or in the evening) and ds will go to sleep for my mum or dp with a bit of singing or rocking - bfing's a whole lot easier for me though so might as well make use of my assets . Anyway better stop rambling, fab discussion btw

Sorry Papillon, just reread your post and saw that your dd will be right next to you on her futon. I'm sure that this would be great (lucky you for having such a nice big bedroom) though if she's anything like my ds, don't be surprised to wake up and find her sprawled across the floor fast asleep once she's mobile.

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Would just like to say a big thanks to everyone on this thread, you don't know how much it means to me to know that there are other like minded souls around. It's made me happy all day, only a little thing to get so happy about, I know, but there you go.

xx

That's really sweey Clayhead

That makes me really happy Clayhead. Thank you for the warm fuzzy!

Ah, so that's what it is! I hadn't even realised 'till now that there's a label for it......but then there is for everything I suppose .
Myself and my DH were too conscious of DD being teeny tiny and helpless to co-sleep initially. She had a carrycot right against our bed to start with, but pretty soon she was in with us. We spent a lot of time skin to skin with her (both of us) from the minute she was born. We breastfed for 14 months. Sometimes even now I forget to put her down when we're out and about (she's 23 months!). When I couldn't carry her in my arms, she went in a baby sling while I got on with house stuff. We've never ever left her to cry for our company, we'd always get to her immediately if she cried. As far as I'm concerned () she's growing in to a lovely child, with a beautiful, gentle nature. She's talkative and intelligent, extremely funny, and concious of other people and their feelings....she certainly seems to be of a nurturing rather than an agressive nature. I don't know if ap (if that's what it is!) has had any bearing on the person she is, but we'll certainly be continuing this parenting style with the next one too . Anything else would have felt unnatural!

I dont suppose many people plan to do attachment parenting, it just happens as it seems to be so right and you think you're the only one until you find the term ap.
I think that giving your child security gives them the confidence to be confident and independant- certainly worked with ds.

I am lucky that I have friends that do AP (without knowing it). It also made me want to find out if what felt right to us was right and most importantly beneficial for our baby.
All the literature seems to point in that direction - that AP really does what you say Hercules - confidence and independence.
Perhaps it provides them with the confidence and security to better deal with the knocks of life?

We're much the same as the rest of you - more y accident than design. I knew I didn't like routines, (am Mrs Disorganised!) and wanted to breastfeed, carry baby etc - it was my Mum who said she'd never left us to cry that made me think about it. We co-slept when we could to get some sleep with ds (couldn't with dd1 as I was on sleepy antidepressants) and do a lot with dd2 as I am too lazy and warm to get out of bed to put her back in her cot!
Nice to know I'm in good company!

Susanmt, my mum said exactly the same. I remember reading in a parenting book (Bounty one I think - I'm a bit tight ) that bfing to sleep was a very difficult habit to break and that from 2-3 weeks you should put your baby down to sleep awake and telling my mum how worried I was that I was allowing ds to develop bad habits (at 3 weeks!) She responded by saying that she had just liked to keep us as happy as possible when we were babies and that we'd turned out alright (well I don't know about that but I don't need the boob to get to sleep ) Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that do you think a tendency towards a more attachmenty sort of parenting runs in families? Can't remember if there was anything about this on mears' recent lovely thread.

Interesting point but have no idea.