Any Benefits of Crying?

[beartime]

Sometimes, I'm learning , crying babies have been fed, changed and burped and they've had enough sleep, and even rocking and holding doesn't calm them. So then there's the debate of should we plug them with a breast or a dummy to shut them up? But I was wondering, maybe there are some benefits to crying which might be hindered by plugging them? My DH was apparently left to cry in his cot a lot to build his lungs! And he definitely has a loud voice!
Does anyone know of any? Of course these would also make me feel happier when enduring the crying episodes

I read somewhere that we're the only animals who have babies that cry. Other animals' babies are quiet because they don't want to draw attention from predators, but we don't have any natural predators. When we were living in caves, the babies who cried got fed more because the noise of a crying baby is so unbearable that cavemen would do anything just to shut the baby up. So under the laws of natural selection, crying babies got fed more and survived and quiet babies became extinct. So crying is, naturally, just something all babies do.

hear hear, hub2dee.

Pablo, based on what you say, my dd is top of the evolutionary tree!

Hey today I put him down, he started crying, I left him 5 mins, then went back and burped him, out him down, started crying, went back and calmed him down, put him down, started crying. So then I thought lets try the swaddle! So I did, and just like that he stopped crying! Woo hoo! So whoever it was that told how to swaddle - thank you

Great news !

Hey, if your baby likes swadling, you might want to try one of those wrap around slings !

That's great beartime! and in answer to your previous question cranial osteopathy is when an osteopath manipulates the baby's head. Theory is that babies get their heads a bit squished during birth, and for some that can mean lying down can be uncomfortable (hence the crying when you put them down). It is an accepted therapy, although I'm not sure if you can get an NHS referral. Anyway, hopefully you have found a solution for your son!

He had ventouse so might have got squished

What's a wrap around sling - did I buy the wrong one? I got a slingeasy.

There are seven million types of sling. Yours sounds just fine !

Papillon just started a sling chat thread ITH !

yeah I've already printed out her sling diagrams

I'd argue cranial osteopathy is not an accepted theory but I'm a sod like that, LOL. (I mean peer-reviewed, mainstream published, double-blind controlled trials etc... loads of people do say it has helped them though, but so would a few hours sleep, LOL).

Best advice ? Forget the cleaning and cooking and entertaining. Sleep when you can !

Enjoy your sling !

DS was a cryer. 2 things saved my life.

'The Happiest baby On |The Block' by Harvey karp. A book that advocates swaddling for infants. Shows an interesting graph that, from 2 weeks onwards, babies build up their daily dose of 'purple crying' (screaming). The duration of this crying peaks at 6 weeks then declines. I followed his 5 "S's" from 4 weeks and noticed a dramatic decline in the duration of DS's crying.

When DS grew older (approx 10 weeks) I started to carry him everywhere in a Baby Bjorn. He loved it as he could see what I was seeing and I chatted to him the whole time. I got a lot of grief from quite nasty people who maintained I was turning him into a mummy's boy. The opposite turned out to be true once DS learned to crawl - he's a very sociable, interactive wee fella. He loves nothing better than a new environment to exlore.

Good Luck - leaving a baby to cry is really regarded as outdated.

xxx

PS - one of the reasons people maintain cranial osteopathy 'works' is that the sessions usually coincide with the peak and then decline of purple crying.

What are his 5 s's? I think mine has been crying cos he hasn't been getting enough sleep, due to being hard to settle once tired. Now that I'm swaddling him and he is easier to settle he is WAY more contented. Thanks for everyone encouraging me NOT to leave him to cry

And I have hope in 1.5 weeks it sounds like - apart from that's a growth spurt isn't it

Is it

swaddling
'shush'ing
side (on side / cradle hold IYSWIM)
swinging / swaying ?
darn, can't remember the 5th LOL.

Haven't read the book !

Lol Hub2dee, at least you're a better guesser than me!

Is purple crying where they go red in the face? He had a dose of that last night - just wouldn't go down for nap and really screamng for no apparent reason, kept settling him by rockung, putting him down then it started again. In the end I was so worn out I laid down for a minute and woke up half an h9ur later with him still crying - oops. Even the swaddle didn't work that time!

I have read The Happiest baby On by Harvey Karp. I think a baby starts to recognise these as cues to settle and sleep - it is a technique and requires recognition which can take a baby awhile to understand.

I am no fan of crying and don´t personally like leaving a baby or toddler to cry - I am from the Earth mother, attached parent league.

If ds is squalling - I put him back on boob.... on lie him on my chest. Slings help settle babies too.

Feeding during the night, lying down helps him and me get back to sleep alot faster. I used to sit up with dd but am wiser to the ways of making my life as lazy and easy as possible during the night time... and the day time... in fact all the time

bear - baby quite possibly fell asleep for half an hour too, shortly after you !

Never heard of purple crying.

Paps - are you anywhere near Zug ? Or are you in a nice part of Switzerland ?

I have visited Zug several times.. nice lake

I live in Bern the Hauptstadt

LOL the lake is the only nice bit. I worked there for a year. Quite liked places beginning with an 'l' though: Lausanne, Luzern and Lugano !

Watch it my dh was born in an outer crusty part of Zug

First time I went to Zug I camped right next to the lake and the sunsets were lovely - as were the boys plaing volleyball on the sand.

Little did I know what lurked beneath the substrata!

Bern is beautiful, did you ever get there? Lugano, great place for a holiday... love Tessin

Also lived in Baar, right next to Zug. Even nastier, LOL. I also lived in Cham... I got around a bit, LOL.

I think I know that campsite, paps. Does it have a small shack / bar with a dozen attached pot smokers milling about the place ? LOL.... actually... it doesn't does it... it's much further out that that... it's near a 'beach' isn't it ? I think you drive under a weird little tunnel to get there. It's next to the train track, right ?

Was quite a fun Summer now I think back (and now I'm back home, LOL)... was apart from dw (then gf ya see...) was quite a hard year...

The Swiss are, ahem, somewhat unique....

pmsl.

Sorry - not sure I reached Bern... probably did. I think my car may have broke down in Bern and no one stopped to help (in the city) for HOURS upon HOURS upon HOURS. All I needed was a jump. LOL

purple crying - when they scream sooooooo much they go blue in the face . The majority of shaken baby cases happen at approx the 6 week mark when purple crying is at its peak.

5S's
Swaddle
lie/hold on his Side (never hold a crying baby so that he is lying on his back - it activates the freak-out Moru reflex)
Ssssshhhhh (must match the volume of the crying; any white noise will do)
Swing/Shoogle Suck (once they have settled a bit; booby, dummy etc)

Swaddling - they will resist but stick with it. Use 2 receiving blankets. One to pin the arms down, the other to wrap around the whole torso. leave pelvis and feet free if worried about hip devpt (ie during the night).

The crying comes in cycles (3 to 4 to start with), but as your baby recognises the 5S's as a calming trigger, you'll probaby only get one scream. DS got to the stage where loosely wrapping him in the swaddle settled him straight away.

I had no idea you shouldn't lie a crying baby on their back. Thanks.

I find swaying, with Dd held so she's loking over my shoulder, while sing/listening to Carole King works. Did sway and listen to Carole King alot while pg though.

Pap - why didn't that surprise me that you were into attached parenting

Ding Dong thanks for the info - I might print it out and stick it in the nursery I didn't get what the fourth one was. And can you help me with the receiving blanket thing - they are supposed to be cotton aren't they - where do you get them? Is a cellular as good? And how do you hold them on their side - sorry to be thick And are you from scotland? I don't think mine's ever gone blue, but has gone pretty deep red.

As for switzerland, I've been to Geneva, and some waterfall on the border of the black forest in Germany, I think both were french speaking tho' so probably not near you. I LOVE the scenery in switzerland.

ah, hubdee you are quite right - I should have said that osteopathy is a regulated therapy (ie practitioners have to have a course of training/belong to an accredited society). What I really meant is that they are not a load of cranks, but I thought that might be impolite!