29 going on a 100!!

[Alexsmum]

Does anyone else have those days when you feel so old it just makes you want to cry? Well, I'm having one today. I haven't stopped all day but i've been doing things like taking ds to toddler group,attacking the laundry mountain,and putting the kitchen back together after a recent disaster.I've had builders in for the past 2 weeks and when today I finally thought it was all sorted , the washing machine went on the blink so I think we're going to need a new one.More money. And to top it all off, while I scurried around this evening dh lounged on the sofa watching tv all evening.I felt like we had finally turned into my parents. Don't get me wrong ,he's normally really good but he's having a rough time at work at the moment and is really grumpy about it and about all the work in the house and the fact that said house seems to be falling down around our ears.
I couldn't help but think wistfully about being 18 and smooching with strange boys in discos and the only worries being whether you can afford a new dress to go out on saturday night.
Moan moan moan . Sorry.Just needed to get it off my chest.

Hello all, I can't believe how many people have posted messages...i'm not the only one hurrah!!!
Actually I'm feeling a lot better and more on top of things now.Getting the house back to some semblence of normality helps as did having a lovely night out drinking and dancing with dh and some friends.It did both of us good to get out without the baby and be a young couple, rather than parents with a dilapidated house,builders, a dodgy washing machine and no money!!
Its easy to look back and remember how exciting it was going out all the time, and being young and free but I always forget that I wanted the boys I snogged to be the love of my life, and how awful it was to be the only girl in the group who hadn't copped off at 2 am.And to be insecure about yourself all the time..etc etc etc.I should also remind myself when ds is driving me up the wall, how awful I felt when we were trying for a baby and nothing was happening and how full of delight we were when we found out we were having him.
Its so hard being a mum and for those of us who are at home full time and don't even have the respite of going to work and talking to other adults, it can really get you down when you spend all day with this little voice saying 'mummy mummy mummy'( which incidentally is my sons general word for everything..i want,get it for me,pay me attention,...its a wail of despair its evrything.And all things nice are daddy!!!!)I don't thhink there's any chance of me having an affair though..unless the toddler group starts getting some foxy dads going ! Or i pick someone up in the supermarket or at the park!!God the lack of opportunity is so sad its funny!!And if I did meet someone they'd be put off by my constantly singing the theme tune to bear in the big blue house under my breath.!!!! No,Dh and i are definitely in it for the long haul and he is a bit of a studmuffin so I don't mind!!
Thanks for all your messages of support..it makes me feel better to know i'm not the only one feeling like this.I guess we've just got to keep remembering to count our blessings.

God, I love this website. Some of these messages are hilarious and I'm glad I'm not the only one out there who sometimes feels that life has changed too much.
I am having a crap time at the moment. The builders seem to have been in our house for what feels like an eternity and the end is not yet in sight. I just had a crappy holiday with a very grumpy dh, a relative has just died, I have reached the fat but not quite pregnant looking stage, I have had to resign from my Montessori training course because I couldn't cope with the workload, I have had to cancel an evening out with friends again as dh is working abroad again ..... blah, blah, blah!
Old, I feel pre-historic. The worst thing is, I have this irritating little voice droning in my head, saying "You don't know how lucky you are. Think of all those people who died in America, think of all those people who would give limbs to have babies, think of all those refugees from Afghanistan etc. etc" and then I feel guilty for feeling bad!!!!!!!
Oh, it is so good to have a moan. Thanks Alexsmum and glad to hear you are feeling more perky - keep watching out for those foxy dads!!!

Bugsy, sorry about the rotten time you're having, especially having to give up your Montessori course. You posted a few times on how much you were looking forward to it. And your holiday too..er...it wasn't the one you won, was it? I hope you get shot of the builders soon, they can destroy your equilibrium as well as your carpets.
I don't think I want to rewind back to my late teens but I certainly wish I had today's brain coupled with 1983's pelvic floor and bustline.

Bugsy,

I sympathise totally about the builders. We had an extension built when I was pregnant with child no. 2. They started in April, were supposed to finish in July, and finally finished at the end of October just 2 weeks before dd arrived (and she was a week late!). We had no electricity for weeks on end becuase the rain got in - ds thought having baths by candlelight was great! Worth all the stress in the end, though.

I'm having a whole weekend off the weekend after next, and I'm not going to do anything except exactly what I want - bliss! I know I'll be glad to see the kids when I get back, though.

Oh god how true all these messages are! I can't understand where my life went sometimes.

On Saturday both DH and me sat in our daughter's bedroom, looked at our 2 lovely girls and both agreed that sometimes, just sometimes we wish we didn't have them. After one baby we were so smug and thought, hey lets have another, just as no1 hit the terrible 2's. So 6 months on we are knackered, with a childminding situation from hell, a screaming banshee for a toddler who has decided sleep is for wimps, a teething baby, and way way too much stress!

I love my girls but I spend all my time working, shopping, housework, sorting out the day to day hassles, that when I tried to go shopping for myself the other day, I didn't have the energy.

I don't want to be 18 again, 26 was a good age, it was when I met my Dh, and bought my first house. All I want is one nights sleep, all the way through and to have a pee in piece!! Even better a bath all to myself would be utter bliss

Do you know, I read somewhere that having a child physically ages you. Is this true?

Years ago I ran a stall at a gay one-day festival. As I watched the hoards of people pass throughout the day, one thing struck me: the more mature women couples in their 40's and early 50's looked so young, happy and carefree. I know you can't assume they didn't have children, but I guess a good proportion of them did not.

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I'm 32 tomorrow, and although I look back on my "youth" with fondness, and I'm glad I was able to have a fairly wild time before settling down, I wouldn't want to be 18 again. Too much angst. I completely agree with Alexsmum about wanting the boy you snogged to be the love of your life, etc... When I talk to my friends from college, who haven't yet had children, it's like they live on a different planet where to have loads of money is the norm, and eating out every night is a necessity, rather than a treat you look forward to for a month.
Having said that, I can't imagine still living that life now - been there, done that, moved on. So life's not so bad, really!

I'm actually really looking forward to hitting my mid-thirties, as I'm completely convinced that I will be confident, self-satisfied and completely thin and gorgeous... The only flaw in this plan is this is precisely what I thought about approaching my mid-twenties and yet here I am, still the neurotic, spotty, bumbling, dis-organised, paranoid fat bird I was in my teens and STILL searching for the love of my life only this time I'm not getting any drunken snogs, ARRRGH!!!!

Is everybody totally knackered when they have a toddler.My daughter is just over 2 and always on the go.I can't remember when I had a full nights sleep, went to the loo in peace, put my make-up on without having somebody saying "My turn now!" But I wouldn't be without her....when I'm away from her I just don't know what to do. But sometimes, just sometimes wouldn't it be nice not to have the resposnibility of having a little one so that I could be sponstaneous and a little bit reckles...well not that reckless really!!!
My hubby wants another....would I be twice as tired?????Or maybe just life in a blur of children!

Judith1, I am always tired, my ds is approaching 13 months. He is now at the exploring stage and never really wants to be in anything just always on the floor. He is with me all the time, I take him to work with me. He wakes me up 2am ish every night and I have my cap on most of the time as I just dont get time to do my hair (when I did find 10 minutes to do it the other day I got drenched and had to put my cap on again). My hubby now wants number 2 which I did have to think about for a while before agreeing. But I love every minute and cant really think of a time when I have wished for time on my own, just more time in the day.

Just had a great idea - our messages should be shown to teenage girls...we could be the best form of contraceptive ever!!

But really, I have been reading all your messages and so many of the points raised ring so true to me too. Especially the aging part. I love my sons but.....what have they done to my body?! I went through a bad patch after the second birth of feeling really down about how I looked. So I took a few small steps to change the things I didn't like about my image. I had my hair cut, performed a few light exercises every day (the baby makes a great dunbell) and started using a whitening toothpaste (I had read somewhere that whiter teeth takes years off your appearance). I was going to have my teeth professionally whitened but couldn't afford it and found my Macleans tube a more affordable option. After a month I was feeling a lot better about how I looked. I am not saying I look like a supermodel but at least it is not depressing me anymore to look in the mirror.