How do I dispose of the corpse (I'm desperate)

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

How do I dispose of the corpse once I have offed the effing cat that is using our garden as a toilet?

I am actually reaching the end of my tether with this. Really.

Every morning I have to nip out before the children do and pick up the cat turds that the offending beast has smugly deposited on the lawn/patio/behind the tubs. And when it?s not well, it?s not easy to clean up after it.

It?s not just gross, it?s dangerous. I choose not to have a cat, so why does someone else have the right to subject my children to the possibility of toxoplasmosis or toxicariasis that could leave them blinded or worse.

We have a small garden (30ft by 20ft) which we?ve designed so that DD and DS can make the most of every inch of it on bike/scooter/climbing-frame/seesaw etc. It?s surrounded by fences that are at least 5ft high, so we can?t be accused of inviting pets in, but still the cat comes in every night and does it?s nasty business.

We?ve tried the smelly granules, half-full lemonade bottles and an ultrasonic device, but the cat just takes the piss. Apparently we could try to tack spiky stuff to the top of our fences, but some of the fences are topped with honeysuckle and clematis so it wouldn?t work on those parts and the cat could still get in ? and the stuff is very expensive ? why should I be shelling out when it?s someone else?s property that?s in the wrong. I?ve heard of a pungent shrub called Scardy Cat ? has anyone else heard of it/used it? Again why should I plant up our garden with stinking plants ? it shouldn?t be my problem.

If anyone has any other tried and tested remedies ? please let me know asap. You'll certainly be helping me, you could be saving a cat.

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

Pretty sure it's a cat - what else could get in over 5 or 6ft fences? And the poos are often hairy (IYSWIM) - yuk. But like I say it all happens at night, so I haven't actually seen it do its business.

[madmarchhare]

Ooo, am liking that HF.

[BarefootMama]

I had this problem and my dp is a vet! I tried all the usual rubbish and it really got me down - I even fenced off the area but still shit after shit!

It may not work for you but when i was at my wits end i used pepper - normal ground black pepper from tesco. Tonnes of it - it took about a week - they always sniff before they crap plus pepper up your bum no fun!!!! keep us informed!

[SaintGeorge]

A hedgehog on stilts?

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

would that it were a hedgehog, then we wouldn't have a huge snail problem (that's huge problem, not huge snails, obviously)

I'll add pepper to the menu - may end up with sneezy children, but that's probably a price worth paying

Silent Roar might be a runner too - I'll look into it

[Podmog]

Message withdrawn

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

Podmog - five minutes away - but I don't really want the Bearcubs rolling about in/cycling through lion poo any more than cat poo

[robinia]

We have the same problem with foxes - in essence they're all wild animals, just cats have been domesticated fairly succesfully although obviously not in your case. In fact are you sure this cat has an owner, it may be a stray.

Another possible solution is to provide the cat with a small patch of freshly dug earth which it is likely to prefer to the alternatives, then train your children to keep out of the way of it.
Doesn't work with foxes though as they have no instinct to bury their faeces.

(As an animal lover though I am just happy to see the foxes enjoying my garden)

Incidentally - no risk of toxicariasis - that's a dog-borne disease.
Toxoplasmosis shouldn't be a problem - see www.amm.co.uk/newamm/files/factsabout/fa_toxo.htm
Sorry no time to do a link - just off out.

[anteater]

This may work...

Meoow my day

We had a crow problem, bought an air rifle and they all moved next door!

[hatstand]

I love the scarecrow - but how does it distinguish between cats and toddlers? or mils, or guests staying beyond their welcome, or drunk dhs,or jehovahs witneses (no offence )...suddenly the possibilities seem endless. I'm off to order one now and we haven't got a cat poo problem.

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

I'm not sure I agree that TC is only dog-borne - I did look into this before getting so upset about it.

I hope Hasufrau isn't suggesting we take the Mole story to its logical conclusion.....

[Twiglett]

Lion poo doesn't work .. I have 20 sparkling windmills in my garden and the cat sits there and looks at them lovingly

the closest thing to working is an animal repellent spray from homebase (£4.99 in a yellow bottle) you have to clean up all the poo .. wash it down then spray everywhere with this spray and keep doing it

failing that .. a football

[robinia]

I've had another look at toxocariasis - interestingly, of the UK sites (I usually only Google UK sites) only one mentioned cats as carriers and that was a rather amateurish one so I dismissed it. However, on the US sites several mention cats so presumably they can carry it. I wonder then why in the UK all the emphasis seems to be on dogs, and cats are not mentioned.

[hoxtonchick]

i think it might be foxes too. if you find any effective repellent, do let us know....

[jabberwocky]

You should definitely be concerned about toxoplasmosis and toxocariasis . There have been some excellent suggestions already made. Keep us posted as to what works!

[Blu]

Night vision sights....

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

after some more research, I won't be posting anything through the cat owner's door:

Posted dog excrement gives postman toxicariasis
A Leicestershire postman nearly lost his sight through contact with dog excrement that was posted in a postbox on his round. , 56, was blinded for a time by the infection after coming into contact with it. Mr __, who required antibiotics and six days bed rest said: "My sight was hazy for three or four days and it got quite bad, but they had caught it in time and I was lucky." The Royal Mail has established a specialised unit to clean and repair vandalised post boxes and contaminated mail.
www.safetynews.co.uk/archive%20safety%20news%2015.12.02.htm

[Blu]

Poor postie, that's horrible.

Er bear, what research were you doing into shit-posting? Just as a matter of curiousity?

self-sealing sandwich bags...

[handlemecarefully]

Disbelief emoticon!

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

Blu are you some kind of twisted militant activist - big guns, night vision and self-sealing sandwich bags!?!

no seriosuly I was looking for toxo/toxi nastiness to print off and pin to the cat's back before I launch it Jonny Wilkinson-style into it's owner's garden

[BearintheBigBlueHouse]

"its" obviously

[motherinferior]

Yes, she is. No feline in South East London is safe when Blu prowls the streets.

[giraffeski]

Message withdrawn

[marthamoo]

Oh I have so much sympathy - no solutions though. Our cat toilet, sorry, lawn, seems to be a magnet for every disgusting moggy in the vicinity.

Have tried orange peel, bottles of water, moth balls, proprietary remedies, lion dung, CDs, streamers of foil, windmills, corks (keeping a stash by the back door and chucking them at any cat in the garden - whether pooing or not), Jeyes Fluid (in yoghurt pots sunk in the ground), pepper, chilli powder, Olbas oil on teabags, garden canes stuck in the ground...with limited success.

The only thing that really seems to help is keeping the grass really short - I mean cutting it once a week minimum in summer, cleaning the poo up immediately, and I think the Olbas oil on teabags does deter them (the oil needs refreshing daily). Oh and I tried the Scaredy Cat plants but they died!

Found this while looking online. Don't know if there's anything different on there.

I used to love cats...