Grandma had a stroke... what next?

[Spod]

I'm after some advice... my dh's grandma (86) had a stroke yesterday and we're not sure what's going on in terms of likely treatment and care. At the moment we are waiting for her to have a CT scan at some point (they dont seem to be in a hurry to get this done...why not?) in order to assess damage. In the meantime she is nil by mouth until they decide whether she can swallow (they do some test for this also...why hasnt this been done 36hrs after admission?). She is awake but unable to speak, she is 95% deaf too so communicating is impossible. at first she couldnt move her right side, but this is improving. its very frustrating because nothing seems to be happening... is this just what happens after someone has a stroke? also, we cant see how she can go back to live alone in her own home (she received care in the home before) so what happens? care home? can care homes provide high level of care? anyone with knowledge or experience of this?
tia.

I dunno, Spod - maybe it makes them feel safe. Or maybe they're waiting for it to come in handy. My friend's gran had 17lbs of goose fat in her cupboard when she died!!!

What's the latest on your gran? Is she showing any more improvement? My mil was discharged on Friday, without warning. Sil got home from work to find a message on her answer machine to 'come and pick up your mother asap'. It was 6.30 by the time sil got to the hospital and poor mum had been sitting on a chair in just her nightie and dressing gown for several hours by then.

Sil got told off for not having procured a wheelchair on her way to the ward and then tut-tutted at when she told them she has a back problem and was unable to push one anyway. A nurse begrudgingly took them to the exit and then berated sil for not having parked right outside the door. Sil pointed out that it was an 'Ambulance Only' area and the nurse said 'oh, don't take any notice of that, everyone parks here.' So much for trying to do the right thing.

Anyway, mil is now staying with sil for a while. She's very tired and sleepy and not very mobile but is now eating. We're not sure what happens next - I guess the NHS feels its done its bit and we muddle on to the next crisis.

I hope you don't mind me venting my spleen. It helps to have a good rant, doesn't it!

I hope your dh's gran is shown some improvement by now, Spod, and that the wheels are turning wrt to her treatment. Having a relative in hospital is so draining on everyone, absolutely exhausting. Look after yourself too, it could be a long road for you to travel

My MIL seems to be improving, although because she managed to get up and walk round her bed yesterday they want to send her home tomorrow!!!! We can't see how she can possibly look after herself at the moment - it would be downright dangerous, imo. Dh's sister is the one who is having to deal with the situation as she lives nearby while we're over 500 miles away. We just feel impotent to help in practical terms.

thanx for the support... things arent really any better... grandma is still nil by mouth since saturday and they havent even done a swallow test! the consultant said she cant see why this has not been done. i complained that no-one had washed her mouth/face and this was done later by the looks of things. i understand what you're saying about the scan... poor thing also has a urine infection from the catheter and a temperature... she has started moving her limbs but still cannot speak words...... suedonim.... have you got a social worker assigned to the case? in our experience they are the best people to stop early disharge from hospital... sounds weird but never give the hospital or social services an inkling that the family are able to provide much help... it makes it harder for them to discharge...

Spod,
Sorry to hear your dh's gran is no better.If you are worried about the level of care she is receiving can I suggest you either ask to make an appointment to see the consultant or the ward sister. Make a list of your concerns including scans, swallow test, nursing care and their criteria for assessment for admission to the stroke unit ( do they have one?) If there is still some query re suitability for a swallow test there needs to be some thought towards long term feeding.From a nursing perspective can I suggest that as a family you nominate one person as a spokesperson and this person is the one that communicates with the ward staff/consultant and then filters the information to the rest of the family. This is always (IME) appreciated as information is not having to be repeated so often and there is less chance of getting conflicting advice. Keep a record of concerns that you have and the responses made to these concerns. Has your gran had much physio input? This is vital in the early stages of a stroke even when bed bound to avoid contracture of the limbs. HTH

we got the results of the scans, it seems shes had a moderate to sever stroke, has extensive brain atrophy/shrinkage. She is looking brighter, and surprisingly she seems content... smiling and trying to chuckle etc... but she cannot communicate, speech is no better. her mobility is terrible (always was) altho' they did get her out of bed into a chair yesterday. the consultant isnt expecting her to become terribly mobile by the sounds of it. they are gonna give her 2 weeks and see what improvemtn she can make and then it loooks like a nursing home... which if she has any idea what is going on, she will hate. they are medicating her for blood pressure, heart, coleterol busters etc... which if she knew were drugs to help keep her going we are sure she wouldnt want... its just a waiting game i guess. just so draining when there is only me and dh to visit every day, and a 9mth baby to juggle, as i dont want to take her into the hospital.
Suedonim... i am gobsmaked at the treament of your sil and the sudden discharge of your mil... sounds hasty. who do some people think they are? we have had similar experiences when grandma has been in hospital before... some people just don't care about their patients or their relatives..... its so disheartening, demoralising and a true slap in the face. how are things for you all now?

Hi, Spod. I'm sorry the prognosis isn't that hopeful for your gran. You're spot on with it now being a waiting game - it's so difficult to know what to do next, and worse, what might be round the corner. The lack of a timetable makes all so disorientating, doesn't it? If you think your gran might need to go into a home you might be advised to have a look at a few now, so that you don't have to take the first one that comes along when she's discharged. It's good to hear your gran seems content, a small ray of sunshine amongst all the gloom.

Mil is still at my SIL's house and I suspect, will be for a good while yet. No scan results have filtered through so far. Mum is on a/b's for her leg, aspirin and cholesteral drugs for her strokes. I guess the cholesteral one must be standard treatment, if your gran is also on them. Mum hasn't been downstairs for two days now, says her leg hurts too much, though I wonder whether she's losing the will to live. My 17yo dd is on holiday down south and went to see her Nanna on Tuesday. She seems okay mentally, perfectly all there, and was delighted to see dd1. We're going to visit at the beginning of Aug. We'd go sooner if required but sil says it isn't necessary atm.

Take care, Spod, and try to get some time to yourself, if you can.