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The One and Only TEA Room: Everyone Welcome (bring champagne and muffins please!)

1000 replies

Jacksmama · 17/01/2009 00:55

Wow, we're on our third thread!!!
Previous (second) incarnation of the tea room.

A warm welcome to everyone, whether you have one child, none, or ten. This is a tea-and-muffin or booze-and-sofasorcanapees sanctuary for all. But certain standards of behaviour continue to apply - anyone engaging in fisticuffs will be ejected by George Clooney, ably assisted by Mellors the Gardener.

Cheers all!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
mistlethrush · 30/01/2009 09:23

AAghhhh - its all gone different!!! How will I cope. No 'add' button at the top, so I suppose I might have to start reading threads the more conventional way round....

Amber - book sounds really interesting. Do you mind me asking (if you do, please just shoot me down in flames) - do you think that it is easier to get on with people and have relationships etc (which you clearly do ) having accepted that ASD is a part of your life rather than trying to pretend that it is not? (Sorry, this sounds peculiar - just that a good friend had a long relationship with someone who she, with the benefit of hindsight, now thinks had Aspergers to a degree - but he refused to acknowledge that there was any issue...)

TW - lovely link, very thought provoking...

zazen · 30/01/2009 09:27

Maybe I've been exposed to unscrupulous Hot Cross Bun eating habits!

Sometimes an IL family member takes them out of the freezer and just defrosts them and eats them ...COLD..yuk yuk yukky.. more like Very Cross DoughBalls of Chew.

But I do live them sliced thinly, like a little loaf of bread, then toasted and then drowned in butter. You can get a surprisingly high number of slices for such a little bun
That's excellent amber.

So what do you think of the new site?

zazen · 30/01/2009 09:29

er "love" them as well!

I loved that youtube link, Thumb, thanks!

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 09:39

Mistle, yup, I'm trying to pretend that mumsnet looks the same. If I scroll far enough down, it almost does, so I'm coping (just). For me, it's a bit bit like if you're blind and you walk into your living room and some s*d had moved all the furniture to a new position without telling you. I'll get used to it...

I never, ever mind what people ask about ASDs as I'm sure others can just look at the other messages and ignore it if it's not interesting.

It's a very good question. As there was no such thing as a diagnosis for this for women until fairly recently, (they truly thought it was just some badly behaved boys who had it), most women have had to grow up and cope somehow. I went from "why is this world so strange, why do people behave in these really odd ways?!" to "ooo, this sounds like me!" to "Oh heck, so it is!" over a period of about 2 years leading up to the diagnosis. For me, it was a HUGE relief, because I'd had to assume that I was just stupidly incompetent and just wasn't trying hard enough/must be so awful that I deserved being bullied or treated appallingly by people. Now I know how to try to balance my life, and it's made such a difference to me, and to understanding my dh, who likewise we discovered is ASD.

I'm very fortunate to have very lovely friends in my life who have been there for me and really supported me, as has dh. Well, we support each other. It's such hard work for me to get friendships right when I have a brain that doesn't store info on people in any sensible place, but it's worth it.

Ever seen the Spoons Theory thing? It's not really for ASDs but it's so good, and explains so much about how those with any disability can get so very tired just navigating everyday things.

butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf

It's helped me to be kinder to myself. That sort of insight can help in very many ways.

teafortwo · 30/01/2009 09:42

Oh amber - great book idea!!! I really hope you are enjoying writing it and it is a great success! Thanks for telling us about it.

justaboutisnotastatistician · 30/01/2009 09:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cmotdibbler · 30/01/2009 09:55

Glad to hear that the owner has come back to you with an apology Amber. Perhaps you could suggest that his staff get some training too ?

Shout at me if I come back - I have a pile of expenses to do and I hate doing them so will prevaricate

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 10:24
zazen · 30/01/2009 10:45

amber that's a brilliant link.
I had ME for 8 years in my 20s and had to count my spoons all the time. I always had to keep 20 quid in my pocket for a taxi home - I never thought of it as my reserve spoon, but now realsie that's what I was doing - amazing.

Toddles off to 'that' thread...

justabout - that's utterly shocktastic!
Shout if you need help under that sheet with your stats / P values?

mistlethrush · 30/01/2009 11:46

That's a really nice link Amber - good story and way of explaining things.

Justabout Would you prefer a tea cosy to that reindeer hat - perhaps more in keeping with the location!!!

justaboutisnotastatistician · 30/01/2009 11:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 11:59
mistlethrush · 30/01/2009 11:59

Yes, I agree Justa - it is rather parky in Yorkshire today (ps lol in office at db comments... )

justaboutisnotastatistician · 30/01/2009 12:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mistlethrush · 30/01/2009 12:18

Better steer clear of Mellors using language like that Justa - particularly following the dancing earlier this morning.

Tea/Coffee - count me in! (although currently work ft due to dh's lack of job - also have school run to contend with....)

teafortwo · 30/01/2009 12:41

You live in Yorkshire??? WOW!!!!

Is it really as great as fooc Themadhouse tells us...?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/living_overseas/613580-from-our-own-correspondent

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 14:08

Orgasm and God? Now that IS an interesting Ph.D
My book's got plenty in about sex, but not with God in the same sentence . Do tell!

mistlethrush · 30/01/2009 15:11

Amber - now you see why I'm interested in having a cup of tea with Rev sometime?

daisy99divine · 30/01/2009 15:38

Drat my post last night didn't work and it has taken me until now to get back to the tea romm! [sigh]

But sex and ASD, orgasm and God and Becks and smear tests....glory be!

I shall be fanning myself with mellors racing pig any minute now!

daisy99divine · 30/01/2009 15:40

Must just say, in a few posts we've had
(1) ways to eat Hot Cross Buns

(2) appropriateness of dancing naked wearing reindeer hat or tea cosy

(3) relationships and ASD and ways of looking at the world

(4) aforesaid orgasm/ God/ smear/ Becks and Sex

(5) whether or not Yorkshire is the Place to Be

I do so love the tea room

thumbwitch · 30/01/2009 15:45

revjusta, I thought the only connection with orgasm and God is when people shout "oh God oh God yes that's it" - is there more?

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 15:48

Well they're not getting anywhere near me with a smear test and tea cosy, that's for sure !!

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 15:49

thumbwitch, tsk!

thumbwitch · 30/01/2009 15:53

I loved hot cross buns before I gave up wheat - haven't got round to finding/making my own wheat-free ones yet, although I have a fab recipe for almost wheat-free Xmas pudding - it would be except I didn't realise that suet was fat + wheatflour until this year.

amber32002 · 30/01/2009 15:58

www.dietaryspecials.co.uk/Recipe.php?Id=89&Hot%20Cross%20Buns

Wheat-free Hot Cross Buns. Or a very large supermarket chain (that shall be nameless but begins with T) does a wheat free range of them too.

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