Nursery keeps ringing parents to collect our daughter

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(mistake in the title - nursery keeps ringing US to collect our daughter)

This topic has been discussed before, but our situation feels slightly different, so I’m starting a new thread.

Our 2‑year‑old daughter started nursery on 21 October 2025, and as of today (12 January), we’ve already been called 26 times to collect her due to a “high fever.” Their policy is: cool the child down, administer Calpol, wait 30 minutes, and if there’s no improvement, the parents must collect the child.

What feels strange is that not once has she improved after Calpol at nursery, yet at home she responds to it 9 times out of 10. Out of those 26 occasions, she was only genuinely unwell on about 4 or 5 days. The rest of the time, she was completely fine once we picked her up.

In most cases, the moment she leaves the classroom, the “fever” seems to vanish. She’s suddenly happy, energetic, singing, playing, and remains perfectly well for the rest of the day. This morning we even checked her temperature before leaving home—she was absolutely fine.

These constant calls are now affecting our job stability and mental wellbeing. Both my partner and I work in secondary schools, and we’ve exhausted our paid childcare absence allowance. Any further absences are unpaid and at the headteacher’s discretion. It’s incredibly stressful having to explain yet again that the nursery has called us.

We also don’t have family nearby, so there’s no backup support.

We’ve asked the nursery whether her temperature could be spiking due to distress or emotional upset—something we’ve read can happen in young children. They dismissed this, saying emotions only show externally and don’t affect internal temperature. But it’s hard not to feel like they simply want her collected whenever she’s tearful or unsettled. It’s difficult to understand how she can have a fever only at nursery and then be completely normal the moment she leaves.

Their policy is to send a child home if their temperature is ≥38°C and hasn’t improved after 30 minutes. Our issue is that 30 minutes isn’t long enough for Calpol to work for her—she usually needs closer to an hour. When we’ve tried to explain this, we’re told there is no flexibility because “it’s policy.” It leaves us feeling like they’re not making much effort to support her when she’s emotional, and we have no way of verifying the temperature readings they claim to take.

I’ve also read that some nurseries are stricter because they’re short‑staffed, which makes the whole situation even more concerning.

We’re now reluctantly looking into a childminder. There would be fewer children (just our daughter and two others), the environment is calmer, and childminders generally have a slightly higher threshold before asking parents to collect a child. With fewer children, there’s also less chance of constant bugs being passed around.

Sorry for the long post, but we’re genuinely at a breaking point. We’d prefer for her to stay at the nursery, but the current situation is pushing us toward choosing a childminder as the only realistic option.

Just wondering if anyone has had similar experience?

Ludicrous.

Firstly, why are they checking her temp so often? I don't dismiss valid concerns but if you say she was unwell only on few occasions, why are they seemingly constantly checking it? 26 times since end of October is crazy.

I agree Calpol wouldn't work within 30 mins. A pointless policy.

I would also agree Nurofen may be a better option, my DC too reacts better to it with fever and much faster. Calpol tends to be first line and is gentler though so that's a tough one sometimes.

Is she teething? Get a letter from your Dr if so to explain she should not be sent home for that reason, it's not an illness.

I'll be honest OP, it smacks of being short staffed. I'd get a diary and note exactly when they call you, see if there's a pattern. Then confront them if you wish but realistically you want to find a different place for your DD. I think this is concerning and I wouldn't want her there if I were you.

They're short staffed doing a school run from preschool then.

Maybe because most childminders work weird hours not suitable for FT working parents?

Huh?

Honestly they're probably short staffed or the staff can't be bothered. We had so much of this when our children went to nursery, my favourite call when I was in the office was to come and get DS because he'd done a hard poo and was upset. I can't believe I actually picked him up in hindsight.

Huh? If they do wraparound care to local schools, they could well be on the school run. Some LAs offer part-days only (mine does) and this would fit in if OP's LA does too.

Calpol usually takes effect within 30 minutes to an hour. With a fever reacts within 15 minutes

I don't think I'd trust them after this, even if you could do something to make them realise they can't manipulate you into taking her home for no real reason.

If you are checking her fever before sending her in, that implies you think she might be ill, so why are you sending her in?

I would leave this nursery and find a good childminder. You’re right that they would suit your needs better.

I have been pretty much where you are and it’s so so stressful.
After a disastrous time with childcare with our first son, I put a huge amount of effort into finding the right childminder for our second. She is, frankly, one of the best things that has ever happened to our family. We adore her, our son adores her, the other three children adore her and each other. Over Christmas my two year old actually asked to go to her house! She gets them out of the house a lot, which I think is great.

Our first “nanny” would cancel all the time with no notice, worked about half the hours she was paid to and constantly demanded more petty cash. She would also take my son on endless car trips for things for her - I only found out about this by accident.
It was awful and we put him in nursery when he turned two which was much more reliable. Basically - just make sure you get the right person. I learnt the hard way.

good luck and hope things get better soon. X

Yes agree with all this. Move. They are not meeting your needs. That is a crazy amount of phone calls. As you are both teachers have you spoken to your union for support? (Your school should try to support you as much as possible although I realise this is a lot of phone calls)

What is her normal healthy temperature?. Some children are on the lower or higher side of average.

Ask for a meeting with the manager to explain your concerns. And suggest a plan going forward. Ask if they feel she is settled and what they are doing to help ease this situation for you as a family. Ask them if they feel this situation is normal given she is usually ok after you have had to fetch her home.

Then, take her temperature in front of them as you drop her off each and every day and record it. Let them see it’s normal at drop off.

When they call you to say she has a high temperature, ask them ….. exactly what her temperature was recorded as, what time it was taken, whether meds had been given, which staff member took it, what symptoms of illness she is now displaying, what alerted the staff member to her possibly having a higher than normal temperature in the first place eg what she was doing at the time, -playing happily, having a warm drink and snack, running in the playground with a friend, or upset about being left and still crying etc.
And yes, take her temperature as soon as you arrive to fetch her after their call and before you leave the premises with her. Question it if necessary.

Nursery have to work with you on settling her properly instead of applying policy strictly with no wisdom or long term strategy.

Make sure you have taken every step to make it works before removing her.

It does sound like she might be better suited in a smaller nursery or with a child minder. Perhaps the occupancy of the present nursery is overwhelming?

This is mental! We weren't called once to collect my dd when she was at nursery from age 22 months to 4 and we only had to keep her off ourselves once due to a viral wheeze. Since she's been at school we've only been called twice, once because she broke out in chickenpox and once because she didn't want to play dodgeball (can't say I blame her) had a 'stomach ache'. There's either something really up with your child or something really up with the nursery. As pp have said I'd be clarifying why exactly the temp is being checked, checking it myself on arrival and doing a quick headcount to see if they're in ratio. If your child is genuinely getting this many fevers I think you need to see the GP. If not I would find another nursery/childminder as I wouldn't trust that the culture of this one is going to change even if I do challenge it. I disagree that CM is better than nursery though. There are good and bad examples of both. I had my dd in a really bad CM's for a short while and I could more imagine them pulling this crap than her lovely nursery tbh

Devils advocate here.

My current role is Clinical advisor for 111 (Nurse). I have worked through 10 years of winters, mostly on the front line at ED.

The interesting thing about this role, is picking up the patterns of outbreaks across the whole of England. I do not say this lightly.... this year was ROUGH.

This Flu was honestly incomparable to any Flu i have seen. HMPV made a comeback, these have hospitilised many Adults and children. Theres Norovirus everywhere, scarlet fever outbreaks.

Last year i had to send my friend to ED, shes a nursery manager, she picked up strep from the kids, an abcess formed in her neck she could hardly breath.

They might just be panicking, you do not know who has been ill, been hospitilised, how many staff were taken out.

There may just be a bit of trauma, cos honestly. Having the flu and noro virus at the same time is not for the weak.

It was the WORSE year for illness i have seen in 10 years.

The Current Flu hits has all the same symptoms as meningitis. Severe headache, stiff neck Photophobia. Most people (esp men) are pretty convinced its their last day on earth

This year, i would forgive a nursery for panicking over a temperature.

On another note, please get a proper thermometer. Digital, mouth and underarm. Better still buy Therma- dots. They are single use, they are the most accurate thermometer availible. Most of the ones availible to buy are innacurate.

If your child actually did spike 26 temps since October but has no other cold/ flu like symptoms.

Thats a little concerning. I would want to monitor that at different times to ensure it was an error.

Most likely they are using a tympanic, they change how they work depending on the ear they are used on. It could just be erroneous readings from the shape of your childs ear canal + sweating from play.

I think I'd put an anonymous post on sm asking who in my area was having the same trouble.

It MAY be just one person doing this and the management is unaware....

It does seem they're fabricating it...

Next time - could you ask them to video call you while taking the temp?

My guess... The calls would stop.

She obviously doesn’t have a fever. No one should have a fever this often!!! So clearly they are either stupid or understaffed, or your daughter has another issue.

Id move because it’s not sustainable. I’d also leave them a poor review. This is literally the opposite of what you and your child need from a childcare setting! Rubbish. I’m surprised you’ve lasted 3 months to be honest!

I used the same childminder for my kids and absolutely loved her. I only had to pick up my youngest once in the whole time they were there (4&8 year old now). She was so good and looked after them when they were poorly and I had to work. Obviously I didn’t send them in really ill or with a temp would definitely recommend childminders over nursery.

Yes, I would do that as well.

If your DD is genuinely spiking a fever this often that needs to be investigated by a dr. How was she over the summer? I would be very concerned.

My DD has been in nursery since Oct 2023 and I have never once been called to collect her. At the very least you need to find a new childcare option.

For comparison in this time I would say DD has needed calpol for a fever maybe two or three times.

Remove their right to give your child calpol and then turn up with a thermometer. Unless your child is incredibly sickly this is them deciding you are the easiest route to manage staffing issues. My son hasn't had his temperature checked (never mind found to be about 38 degrees) this many times in 18 months of nursery.

That’s madness. Mine are adults now but I don’t remember ever picking either of them up from nursery unwell.

More likely they have made the Op paranoid sending her home so often. Someone has calculated she is being sent home every other day.

They are clearly short staffed, too many kids on the books and every other parent has got wise to their tactics.
Op needs to get wise to it too.

My son didn't go to nursery but rather pre-school. This sounds incredibly excessive - 26 times in 3 months, is utterly crazy. I can imagine that not only is it stressful but your employer is going to start saying something. I work in a school, and in my experience they are pretty good with staff, but most would start asking questions by this point!

I'm assuming the nursery has the phone number for the school, and is calling? Usually personal mobiles aren't allowed to be used in class. If you or your husband are in the middle of teaching, what happens? Do you have to finish the lesson, then leave to pick your daughter up? Or do you leave immediately? I would stop being 'available' to pick your daughter up, especially if it's immediately. However, I don't think the nursery is a good fit for your daughter, and finding an alternative setting would be better. I work in a First school, and one of our teachers had to pick her son up from nursery. She left at lunchtime to pick her son up, and they had to hold onto him until she could leave. Some jobs mean that unless a child is extremely unwell, you can't just drop everything and go.