Notice period when you suspect neglect

[Trs7]

Hello all,

I'm not a parent but I need some advise for a dear friend. She has a child in nursery and she believes that the nursery is not feeding her child! There are various other instances of dubious practises. At first I was a little sceptical, but having looked at the footage she has of her child clearly not being given food with the rest of the children, I am concerned. Our friend is from another country so although her English is pretty good, she lacks the confidence and knowledge of online forums such as this.
She wants to change nurseries but they say she must give two months notice- surely this isn't correct if you suspect neglectful treatment?
I have told her to contact OFSTED and make a complaint, but in the meantime surely it can't be right that she has to endure this?
Any advise would be very welcome indeed!

What did the nursery say when she asked them? Is the food her daughter has different (allergies? Vegetarian?)
That seems very odd. I think if she threatens ofsted etc they might let her off in the hopes she just goes away quietly but she might need you to advocate for her.

Best approach is to follow the complaints process as unlikely there would any fee waiver without doing so. She should start by asking for an account of the meals served to her dc.

Surely if the child wasn't being fed they'd come home crying and hugely distressed at being so hungry?

She might not be able to afford it, I don’t doubt many people would but I would rather eat dirt for. 2 months than keep my child in a nursery where I suspected she was being neglected. Some things are more important

Correct. They will be suspended on full pay and a strategy meeting will be held to share information relevant to the allegation and to plan any investigations that are necessary. Professionals who participate in LADO strategy meetings will also be asked to draw conclusions about whether the allegation is substantiated or not and how to proceed. An action plan will be drawn up and distributed to all relevant parties.

Its concerning about the footage in an early years setting. The setting should have a safeguarding policy which outlines use of mobile phones and other recording technology.

Really? Wow. Glad mine doesn't do it either!

With this in mind, make sure you're not using a false allegation against a staff member to get out of paying notice fees should you wish to change nursery.
Allegations carry huge consequences.

You may have a genuine concern over neglect but all this "asking for a friend" and vague details is a little strange.

@Knors I think it was in response to a paedophile case that was all over the news when mine were younger, so maybe 15 years ago or more. A woman working in a nursery was taking and distributing images of the children when she was changing them. So I think some parents felt this offered a bit of reassurance.

I know! I get the sentiment behind it but to me it opens more cans of worms than it closes!

Once those images have been displayed on a screen, albeit live at point of contact, there is no telling what a parent may do with it if they record the screen etc or if someone happens upon their screen because left themselves logged in.

Not to mention the possibility of the system being hacked into! Terrifying.

I wouldn't say it's (your child being on video) "terrifying"?

Unless you have custody of a child who is in protection and cannot be identified at a location, it's not much different to strangers walking past and seeing your child playing in the outside area.

Indeed, I can’t imagine that a nursery is at the forefront of cybersecurity!

A woman working in a nursery was taking and distributing images of the children when she was changing them. So I think some parents felt this offered a bit of reassurance.

That's correct, Vanessa George. CCTV won't actually have stopped this from happening though because she was taking the photos in in toilet/ nappy change areas where you wouldn't have CCTV anyway. The biggest issue was that she had her phone on her to be able to take the pictures! I'm a nursery nurse and have never known personal phones to be allowed around the children. They're kept in staff rooms/ lockers/ an office, some nurseries lock them away in a safe.

By the child not being given food with the other children - what are the circumstances of this? Are the children all sat in high chairs and food is dished out one by one, except to their child, leaving them sat at a high chair for the entire mealtime with nothing? Or are they sat at a table and have food dished out or are supported to serve themselves and the child doesn't take anything and again sits there with no food? Or is it some children are sat down eating and their child is elsewhere in the room doing something else - which could be because they don't like sitting at the table, get distressed, prefer to eat independently, or some kids just don't like eating at nursery. Is it in a manner that suggests deliberate and obvious restriction for that child, or have you just seen a clip where some kids are eating and she isn't, which could be explainable?

Presumably it's not covering changing area tho so what you have is video of kids playing dully clothed and eating.. Exactly what you could get in a soft play, the local park etc. Hardly paedophile ring stuff

I'm horrified that any nursery allows parents to log in and snoop on webcam footage. I would not be happy if any other child's parent could sit watching my child the whole time she's there.

Presume you never go to soft play, the park etc? Surely you're much more likely to encounter someone wanting to watch your kid there than Lola's Mom logging on just to look at your son for 6 hours

But that's different surely? With video they can save it...

There is a lot unexplained in the OP. Age of child is important, not feeding a baby is very different to a wilful 2/3yo refusing to come and sit with others so seeming like they are missing out. Also SEN, some children can’t cope with sitting at a table with others but will eat alone later when it’s quieter.

Food refusal is common too at certain ages. You can’t force children to eat if they are pushing it away, only encourage.

As always the best way to deal with it is to go and speak with the staff\manager and find out what might be happening. The mum only has to say what she observed and that she is concerned by the child not eating.

This might be a bit cavalier, but she could take her out without paying and then start a complaint. I used to be on the committee at a nursery in my town and we had a mum who just didn't pay for a term. We did basically fuck all to chase it and she simply never responded to any contact. By the time I left she still hadn't paid and that was almost a full year. Your friend could do the same and save in case she has to pay it, but if she has footage of clear neglect I imagine she would not need to.

BUT, how does she plan to find another nursery immediately though? Also, if word got to them that she hadn't paid, they may not accept her application.

Could she not work from home or take emergency leave and take out her DD and then think about what she's going to do?

I can't imagine any parent would send their child back there without raising the issue the first time they saw it.

Actually no. We don't go to soft play. My daughter has additional needs for which soft play isn't suitable but thanks for that none the less. However, at least publicly I would see if someone is overly keen to sit watching my child.

Also, if word got to them that she hadn't paid, they may not accept her application.

All of our local nurseries are part of a local Early Years cluster-word gets around very fast!

I have. It's quite common here.

Hmm. This sounds odd. Why would they invite parents to view their child and then show them neglecting the children?!

Your friend needs clarification.

Where I worked we would often have 2 sittings for meals if it was a busy day. Could this be happening?