DD not getting outside time at nursery WWYD

[Deathonacrumpet29]

I'm concerned about my daughter and I think nursery are fobbing me off.

They have a large garden but every time I pick my daughter up she hasn't been outside. DD is 14 months. She's only been there a short time and they are busy there (there was a long waiting list).

Her keyworker does send a photo every day but always inside and similar eg food around her mouth at lunch time or her playing in the same area of the room with same toys - but since she has been there she has never taken any photos outside -even on sunny days.

We choose this nursery as it has a reputation for being eco-friendly, outdoorsy and the large garden it has! It's ideal for getting the children in the fresh air and out in nature. For context, the building used to be an old pub so has a massive pub garden and it is right next to a heath! I'm including this so you can see that it isn't in a built up area with no access to outdoor space - quite the opposite!

I complained to the manager and since then I have been informed that she has had outside time but I'm concerned this is only happening to her in isolation and she is being taken out specifically and probably very hastily as I've complained. When asked if she went out with her friends she shakes her head and is very sure she is just taken out on her own? No photos of outside time either.

Do nurseries do this? Only take children out if their parents complain? I'm glad she is getting outside time but I can imagine she is confused why she would go out there by herself. When I queried about this a member of staff said that she didn't know if they all went out as she was on her break!? I asked her to find out and let me know and I've heard nothing.

I'm not friends with any other mums as we drop off at the door due to COVID at different times still so I can't just ask another parent if they know if they go outside.

I think nursery staff are misleading me about this and/or being lazy and I'm not sure what I can do about it?

Has anyone been through similar?

I just want my daughter to get some fresh air - that's why we chose that nursery. Why aren't they taking the children outside?

What would you do?

My middle is 22 months and Is in the baby room, they have outside time but to a lesser extent than the toddlers. Generally only in nice weather cos most of them are still babies and taking a group of small, some immobile babies out just sounds like a recipe for chaos. The toddlers are out loads though.

if you’re not happy with the lack of outdoor time/how the nursery are communicating with you you need to move her.

We get photos of outside play and it's wrote on his report everyday.
What kind of hand over do you have?

Outside every day in my baby room too, unless really bad weather. This includes babies from 3 months. I wouldn't want to stay in one room all day so can't imagine babies would want to either, it'd be like spending the whole day in your sitting room, it's nice to have a change of scenery!

We take lots of photos outdoors, it's written on their daily reports under the 'what we've done today' section (do you not get a piece of paper about their day?), and they often all need change of clothes after - normally from water play or muddy.

I think what would worry me the most is that you've made a point and told them you want her to go outside and yet they still aren't? Kind of shows that they don't care much as they're effectively not dealing with a complaint. Also would be surprised that they would take just your daughter out, as that would affect their ratios, so sounds to me like they're just saying that to keep you happy

I had this with a preschool. They claimed they went outside “all the time.” Never ever took DD outside. I think because getting 15 children into coats / outdoor shoes is a hassle and then they get dirty and some parents complain.

We moved preschool, to one that had a freeflow plastic flap over the outside door and unless it was raining or extremely cold, the children could run in and out. DD loved it.

I’d look around, and maybe try another for one day a week, and if it’s better move her across permanently.

Definitely believe your daughter over the staff, I have seen some very dishonest things, including a mum who was told her son at his first session didn’t cry and was absolutely fine when he’d wailed heartbreakingly for her for over an hour 🧐

If I was in your shoes and experienced what was in the OP, I would move my child. Mine started in winter and I was on their case about it, they said oh it’s winter, or she didn’t have right shoes (in the bag!). now it’s summer they have taken them out lots, and it’s photos in the park on the river, on the slide in their tiny outdoor space. I live in deep London! What puts me off about your situation is they’re fobbing you off and not engaging.

The nursery my baby went to when in the baby room (up to 18mths) they did not take them out and same as u excuse excuse excuse. I reconciled myself that she was only in 2 days a week but I would not be happy AT ALL if was full
time. in the next room up they take them out most days. My other child goes to the older section and they are out all afternoon if dry. I think you need to make clear your concerns in terms of Heath and development of the children being inside all day, then depending on the response make plans to move!

My main concern would not be the outside time but the length of time she is there. You say we choose the nursery so I am assuming not a different for parent. Sending a baby to nursery for 10.5 hours a day is far more detrimental to their well being that lack of outdoor play.

There’s no evidence that early nursery is detrimental. Mine is in for ages, I feel ok about it because she has a strong bond with 4 staff, they know her really well and are physically affectionate with her, and she has her nursery mates for same length of time. Same people, consistent care and environment and strong bonds are important - a nursery with staff turnover or where you can’t observe the strong bonds would worry me. I’m sure OP would have her kid in less time if she could, and she feels awful already about lack of outdoor time, no need to make her feel worse.

@LilacPoppy imagine feeling the need to let another complete stranger that they are parenting all wrong. Just so you know, it doesn’t make you a better parent to put others down because you don’t agree.

@fyn I didn’t say they were parenting all wrong , that’s a huge leap . I said the length of time at nursery was much more of a concern than lack of outdoor time.

I’m afraid this is very common. I worked as a nanny previously and while I was out of work during the pandemic, I got a job with a nursery staffing agency who sent me to lots of different nurseries. The lack of stimulation in general shocked me in most of the nurseries, children rarely taken outside and if they were, it was for 15 minutes or so. Most of the children were bored, playing with the same old toys. Crafts / sensory activities were not the norm and the nurseries were so understaffed that the majority of people working there were staff like me who who had no attachment to the children or official nursery qualifications. Sorry to say this but I think I worked in one nursery out of maybe 10 that I loved, they had external staff coming in several times a week who took the children off to forest school, football, tennis etc.
i really struggled because as a nanny I was always outdoors, or somewhere like local childrens centres/ libraries. My day was jam packed and I felt like I was slowly going insane as nursery staff. Can only imagine how the children felt.

@Psychgrad

Its good to hear your experience but also you have to be balanced.

What does your jam packed day look like as a nanny?

It varied depending on the child’s interests/ mood. Parks/ paddling pool/ farm at least once a day usually in the morning and up until lunchtime and then in the afternoon usually at least one activity with a group such as a music class, art class or just meeting for play dates in a soft play area or Childrens centre. To wind down after dinner we would paint or free play at child’s home.

Also sometimes we would go to a forest school session or swimming.

@Psychgrad

I can see why you hated being in an indoor nursery! But generally I think going out in the morning and or afternoon and then activities and play sounds about right.

It sounds like you weren’t in London or were in a quieter outskirt of London? I think sometimes in the built up urban areas it’s a little harder but there’s no excuse for nurseries not using their garden.

I actually found nannying in zone 1 easier as there was so much to do, when I worked in zone 3, we had to get busses or walk far to get to places but it was still doable. The nurseries I worked in were mainly in zone 2 or 3 so they had ok garden space but they’d still hardly use the garden. In fact, the nursery I said I really liked above, was in zone 5 but they had no garden and the children were always out doing things in parks, I’d nearly move near there to send my own child there.

DS' nursery has a very large garden and forest area they have a smaller part sectioned off for the baby room with just a lawn a squidgy floor area and toys, and second area for the slightly older toddling young ones with a small slide, rocking toys and baby swing. They have another section gated off with a very large wooden climbing tower thing, swing set, slides etc and then the huge forest school area that has a rope swing, outdoor circle time area (stump seats), built in diggers the children use, a ditch they are forever building bridges etc across, holes in the ground with tunnels to climb through, loads of trees, bug houses etc. I'm not sure DS spends an awful lot of time inside, they even do lunch outside on nice days. I'd be very irritated in your shoes, it was important to us too that DS for lots of outdoor play. He comes back filthy, exhausted and very happy.
We get a daily log (by email) each day that tells us all of the activities he engaged with, what he's eaten, what the Montessori and first school activities have been and so on and it's all timed and there are pictures each week. Do you not get any kind of list or record?
You might want to start looking for other provision.

The babies where I work have free flow into the garden from inside, especially now it's spring and the weather is nice. I agree it's very important for everyone to get fresh air in the day.