Is it really good for your child to go to nursery?

[naomi81]

I am a SAHM mainly but try and do a few self employed bits and do a few hours for the family business. It's great as I can take the little one every where with me (18 months) but it's getting harder and harder as she's so active. I am looking into sending her to nursery for a couple of mornings so I can do my work and get the house clean etc as struggle on my own with her. I have ME and fibromyalgia so some days can be extremely tough. My partner works long hours and quite often doesn't see her as she's in bed. Family don't really help, my mum will come for a few hours one afternoon a week to watch her and I run round like an idiot getting all my jobs done, and quite often I will work in the evenings to catch up.

Everyone keeps telling me it's great for kids to go to nursery, I feel really guilty about sending her, and wonder if I should wait till she's 2. Or maybe I am just overthinking everything 🤪

I am an old contributor and was, as was the case in the past, with a sahm until I went to school at 5. I am shy, not very sociable, prefer not to mix in large groups, lack confidence. I used to believe children should be with their DMs but now that nurseries have skilled and trained staff I would say nursery is better.
But it's just one opinion.

From observation, I’d say the majority of children love going to nursery after the age of 3 when they are ready for playing with others rather than struggling to share.

That said, plenty of children enjoy nursery before that age but some struggle with the social aspect of sharing and routines but this is expected and they are helped with this by good practitioners. They all have fun and enjoy new experiences though, whatever age.

At 18ths you may find your child does cry and take a few weeks to settle until they form a bond with the staff, this is normal and not to be worried about. I’d suggest two half days per week initially and build up to what you would prefer in regards to days and hours.

In a situation where you have your own health to consider then nursery is likely to be a positive for both of you.

It depends on the alternative, I think.

I didn't send mine to nursery because I was a SAHM and there was no need. I thought they would gain far more from being at home with me and one another than they would from being in a 'holding pen' with a bunch of other small children. I also love toddlers - it's by far my favourite age. I also actually liked being so close to my children that I could tell that something was wrong just because they were breathing a bit differently. I wouldn't have had that so strongly if they had been at nursery. They were with me the whole time, apart from at night.

However, it works for other families (and your fibromyalgia puts a slightly different spin on it), and some people have no choice.

Children over three get the most out of it in regards to social play with peers and generally speaking those 3 and above settle the quickest into a nursery environment.

However if you need a break to get on with things nursery will give a younger child lots of new experiences and a chance to learn about sharing and learning to trust other people. They often take a bit longer to settle when they are younger and it’s easier if they do a couple of half days initially.

Why not try a childminder...its a smaller homely environment but activities and experience of s nursery....they follow the same standards...EYFS.

I am 100% a nursery lover - for the right nursery. You get a break or a chance at your own career and they get the best of you when they come home. They get to see other children, try out some independence and learn how to speak to other adults confidently. It's a win win for me