Nursey newsletter... shocking!

[fredip71]

I got my ds nursery newletter today and at the end of it, it says , I quote ' It has recently come to our attention that a small minority of parents are chosing to use illegal substances during their spare time'. Heuh? It then goes on about the obvious fact that it is unacceptable to pick up a child when drunk or on drugs etc... and that Nottingham City Social Services would be contacted...
Let's make one thing clear: I am not on drugs and I hate alcohol and of course, I agree that a child is at risk if picked up by someone who is not in a normal state, but the sentence I just quoted seems to be an accusation, is it legit to write this kind of stuff? And parents who do this should get their problems sorted. I am just wondering what your thoughts are? Ta!

Oh absoloutely, if i thought any child was in danger i would do what i felt was right to help.

I would however make damn sure that the child was in danger, and not just that my opinion of the parents lifestyle dictated that the child should be in danger.

I just dont think that a scare-mongering letter sent out by a nursery, creating gossip and possible false accusations is the right way to do things.

Precisely Bassmama - my "spare time" is my own to do with as a I think fit. If I arrive to pick up my children under the influence they would have a case against me. But to talk to parents in that manner is absurd. All they needed to say was that any parent clearly drunk/stoned would face the consequences. It's the 'spare time' bit that really boggles me..... totally unneccessary as far as I can see.

Hmm, well one could criticise the wording, but I suppose the felt they couldn't just do nothing if they thought children were being put at risk. I'd be glad they cared enough about the children that it compelled them to say something, even if they phrased it a bit awkwardly.

Oddly and badly worded, I think.

They run the risk of a few hysterical people removing their kids before they're invited to a crack den for a tea party.

What parents do in their spare time is none of the nursery's business, until such time as the children are affected. So, drunken wall-walking mothers - yes, call SS - but recreational soft drug users - nope.

I'd want to know exactly what came to the nursery's attention and how.

Where is this tea party? sounds fun...!

Fredip - Do you know why the nursery are saying this? I shall assume that they are quite old fashioned people..

Don't know. Either, they have already spoken to the parents in question or not. I am still trying to get hold of the manager about a different matter, but she is rarely in... Will let you know if I see her tomorrow

It maybe that another parent has brought it to their attention that a parent may be under the influence but that parent has not wanted to name names. So with that little information but knowing that a child in their setting maybe at risk ( without any other evidnence) they deemed this to be appropriate instead of just sitting on the information and doing nothing.

perhaps they wanted to give the parent the benefit of the doubt and also make all the parents aware of their legal duties for the safety of a child.When you sign contracts there is a section which covers this and you have given permission for them to contact the appropriate services if they need to.
Drunken or druged parents/carers are not alowed to collect children and the nursery should contact the police immediate.
i don't see this as old fashioned just sensible, if an adult wants to risk their life thats up to them but leave the kids out of it.
p.s the nursery could be in a very affulent area you don't have to be poor to take drugs money does help.
If your not doing anything wrong then don't worry they already know who they are watching and don't want to acuse without facts.
sounds like a very good nursery you should have no worries there

you're right Kidsrus. It isn't located in an affluent area and I have a feeling they have spoken to the parents. Just think the deputy manager should be the manager really...

let's face it they've agonised over the wording for ages and this is what they've come up with

it's not an accusation

they had to say something

I once had some other mummies round for the afternoon and we drank a fair bit of Champagne so all turned up to pick up our 5 year olds somewhat the worse for wear
We all lived a short walk from school so no one was driving. The teacher asked me something and I told her it would have to wait till the following day as I'd been drinking. She was amused as she knew perfectly well that I am usually a model of respectability!

If the nursery has an issue with any particular individuals then they should be spoken to privately. A general letter is wrong imo.

Well that killed the thread, didn't it?!

I think it's perfectly reasonable to make parents aware that the nursery cannot release children into the care of the drugged and drunken! It might not be known by some peope, and it's fair enough to make the policy clear to all.
No need for anyone to get huffy - especially if you're not one of the reeling few!

I worked in a nursery many years ago, and this was a big issue, we had a parent who admitted she was a bit tipsy, as it was her birthday. She had a friend with her and we assumed she was driving.
As usual they drove home, we had often noticed that baby was placed in car seat and not strapped in.
They had a minor bump with the car, baby fell forward and had to have glass removed from face.

Another big problem was fathers who worked in london, and had enjoyed a rather liquid lunch. Forgetting that it was their turn to pick up the babies.
Such intelliegent people with high flying jobs who think that normal rules dont apply to them and they would never harm their children , let alone other drivers and families as they could handle their booze.

I was so fed up with the management lack of action on this matter, that i promised to phone the police every time certain parents turned up worse for wear.

I had spent all day caring and loving these babies, and building a relationship with the parents ,to what end if they dont take proper care of their babies?

what a shocking story. i say good on the nursery, i also used drugs a fair bit and smoked and drank too much, but apart from alcohol have given up since ds arrived. imo its irresponsible to use while you expect to be looking after a child. how would you feel if 1 of the nursery staff showed up "under the influence"?

i wonder how often the local comps would be sending out general warnings like this if it is 'fine' to send out awkwardly worded letters like this one as long as all that counts is the best interest of the kids.

the mind boggles

i actually agree with them , its important that children arent collected by a parent in an unfit state and i`ve noticed someone regularly turning p at school stinking of drink and very merry but not sure whether she drives or not..also there have been a group of moms discussing rather clearly[loudly] about having problems with hteir dealers [drugs] and could someone recommend someone more reliable..and this was in fron tof everyone..kids and parents alike

The thing is nurseries have to d this IMO. IF they have information then they have to act on it. But you need that paper trail to back you up if you do take action. So, by giving the newslwetter out they cover everyone and noone can say they don't know. So, if someone does turn up worse for ware - the nursery can act and the parents have to accept it - they were warned.

It really wouldn't bother me - as I would know it wasn't me it was aimed at!

The other day, I was on my way to pick up DS and one of the mums turned up, stinking of dope (reminiscent of my university days!). I keep seeing her every day and wonder if management have done anything about it or at least approached her??? Perhaps it was just the one off...?
To the last posters, I am not bothered by the letter, just the wording being pretty crap...