Is this how all nurseries are?

[Babymay]

Hi, just wondering if this is the usual way in all nurseries.

My DD is 11 months old and starts nursery in a few weeks. (Toddler room, age 1-2)
We are doing a few weeks of settling in as she is generally a clingy baby. So this week, we've been going every day for a couple of hours. I've always been in the room but will leave her to play untill she cries. The problem is that the staff dont seem to be that intentive to her when she cries. Rather than trying to engage her in some activity, they just sit there and watch her and give up too quickly.

I've been in the room all week and have noted that there is no form of structered activity either. The toddlers literally have free play all day. There are activities laid out for them, but the keyworkers tend to be in a hurry and try and whizz them through the activity as quick as they can just to get it done which doesn't really benefit the toddlers as they've barely had any time to even figure out what they are doing.

Even the way thay talk to the toddlers I find quite brash. There are hardly any cuddles and quite a few babies walk around for hours at a time crying. None of the workers bat an eyelid.

Is this like it is everywhere? Am I expecting too much?

They dont help feeding at all either. If they eat, they eat, if they dont oh well.
I knew it was going to be hard, but I cant help feeling that there should be a little more genuine care for the babies, not like just a job to them. My DD loves nursery rhymes but not once have I seen any been sung or stories read to them.

Am I expecting too much from them and my DD? Really need advice as feel may change to a child minder. Dont know what to do.

No. This sounds horrible.
There should be lots and lots of cuddles.
There should also be structure and activity - even the baby group does painting (with their feet!) and special 'music lessons' at dd's nursery.

My DD has been at her nursery since she was 10.5 mths (now almost 3) and it is nothing like this thank god. The staff are amazing, kind, caring and give tons of cuddles. There are lots of activities for the kids to do if they want and DD has learnt so many nursery rhymes, she knows more than I do. I would definitely be having a word with the manager and finding another nursery.

I agree with others that doesn't sound right.

I picked DS up from nursery last week to find him sat snuggled on his key workers knee and he had been upset and wanted a cuddle. When he was smaller they would rock him to sleep if that was what was needed.

They always have structured activities for them and will spend the time needed to do it with them. They also have plenty of free play time though!

RE eating, they encourage independance but would never leave a child to go hungry. With the younger children they will feed them to there normal routine and even puree the food they provide if needed.

Doesn't sound normal to me either. DS was a bit younger when he started, but his nursery is very structured - all sorts of activities going on, group singing, crafts with a few at a time. Now in the toddler room, so a bit more 'free play' than for babies, but all still relatively structured. They're encourage to feed themselves, but all supervised and 'encouraged', alternatives offered if they don't fancy what's on the menu, and will happily feed them if they're having an off day.
Lack of cuddles sounds really not on - as others have said, it's rare that I see staff at DS' nursery without a toddler attached. Part of the handover in the morning is that they go straight to a cuddle with whichever member of staff is taking them.

Thank you all for your help. I have spoken to the manager at lenghth and voiced my concerns.

the lack of cuddles is what shocks me from this it helps the children feel safe knowing they can have a cuddle with all the members of staff in the nursery and youll always find someone having a snuggle somewhere in the best nurseries and the being left to cry is something i would be concerend about if the staff are giving up too easily but some children like to be left alone to self soothe this doesnt sound like the case here though

the free play i would be less concerned about because the eyfs encourages a lot of free play and frowns a lot on structured activities it is all learning through pay and children should be encouraged to get out activities of their own choosing but they should never be rushed through a activity ever because it can take up to 12 seconds for a child to think about what has just been asked of them and respond so if they are rushed they do not get that vital thinking time

The feeding is another thing i would not do in my nursery if a child turns two they should be independant enough to feed themself unless there is a disability i would always encourage a child to feed themself and do not feed any child in the toddler room (feeding themself is encouraged from a very young age in the baby room not because staff are lazy and do not want to feed a child trust me its less messy if we do feed them its just to encourage independance) chidren will eat if they are hungry they will not starve themself