Anyone with ADHD also have the following traits?

[Diagnosticdigressions]

I'm waiting to be assessed for ADHD so haven't got a formal diagnosis but will be v surprised if I don't meet the threshold. In the meantime though a few other things are coming to the surface - partly because I've done some reading around neurodiversity and acknowledged a bunch of stuff that is 'normal for me' but is probably ND behaviour and partly because I'm observing wider family, across the generations, and seeing some patterns.

I'd be really interested to know if those of you who've been diagnosed or are seeking diagnosis for ADHD can also relate to the following:

• real discomfort around loud / troubling noises (hand dryers, people chewing, fire alarms, noisy tube lines, screaming kids)


• clothing issues e.g. trouble with anything tight round the neck


• difficulty with socialising in a group - I'm fine on a one-to-one basis i.e. having a proper conversation with one or two friends but have realised that I really struggle with group settings where the rules of engagement aren't clear e.g. school playgrounds where you aren't sure who to talk to first or how long to make conversation for or how to end conversations or move between different conversations.


• overwhelm in busy spaces like supermarkets or department stores. The latter always make me really sleepy because I find them too much.


• a feeling of never fitting in anywhere (this has lessened in recent years as I've started to find my tribe but I felt it very strongly in my teens, 20s and 30s).

I can see that some of these traits are typically associated with ASD but all the questionnaires I've looked at also have a bunch of stuff about not understanding jokes or being able to read people's facial expressions or being obsessed with numbers and not liking fiction / imaginative play - none of which apply to me. So, I'm wondering if maybe all the bullet points above are common features of ADHD - can anyone relate?

I just stumbled on this thread. I don’t have any of these conditions but I am generally quite a shy person, definitely an introvert, and prefer small groups to large ones. I don’t like trying to have a conversation with lots of background noise. I’ve got a dry/dark sense of humour. I don’t have any sensory issues but it doesn’t seem in any way unusual to me not to like tight things round your neck or scratchy labels.

surely all these things are just personality traits/normal variations rather than necessarily indicators of a condition? Or is it just about the strength of your feelings/experiences with those things? I don’t mean to be offensive or goady or anything like that so apologise in advance if it comes across that way.

I dithered over getting my daughter assessed for ASD because of the reasons you described. Now she has the diagnosis, it’s as clear to me as the day that she’s autistic.
On the basis of your description of your self, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if you got an ASD diagnosis.
Watch some Yo Samdy Sam videos on YouTube. She was diagnosed as an adult and some of her videos address your concerns.

@Polpetto I do know what you mean and I've put off seeking a diagnosis for a long time for fear of pathologising character traits. But I think it's a question of degrees and how it affects your daily life i.e. lots of people mentally check out from time to time but those with ADHD do it so much of the time that it interferes with their ability to function because they are constantly losing things (think hours and hours every week), forgetting things, missing things, letting people down.

I think also that the things from my list that you've picked out are classic introvert things (I'm also an introvert) whereas what I'm trying (probably inadequately) to describe are things that go beyond the average experience of social shyness i.e. it's not just that I prefer small groups it's that I use up a huge amount of mental energy trying to navigate large group settings and they cause me a lot of anxiety and overwhelm, I find particular noises really, really hard to deal with rather than just a bit annoying - that combined with the regular ADD symptoms make them quite debilitating.

@Lunificent Thanks for posting - I'll have a look at Yo Samdy Sam

Thanks @Diagnosticdigressions that makes complete sense to me.

I have ADHD (diagnosed by a psychiatrist who specialices in adult ADHD about 5 years ago) and none of the things you mentioned are an issue for me. All your points seem more typical of autism than ADHD from what I've read.

I have ADHD, I'm ok with noise but hypersensitive to light, bright light is fine but I cannot tolerate dingey, overcast light. Dull days make me anxious and visiting Sweden in winter when it began to get dark at 2PM absolutely messed with me.

Can't bear tight clothes, neck definitely but also waistbands, bras, the feel of certain fabric. I don't like mismatched fabrics for e.g. couldn't mix and match my pyjama because of the different fabrics.

Hate group socialising, love one to one.

Can't cope with supermarkets at all, my executive function goes as I get overwhelmed by choice and the fluorescent lights set off my anxiety response.

Not fitting in, not necessarily but more that people see me as a bit of a figure of fun as I'm perceived as overdramatic, over excited, over everything. I saw a counsellor briefly who was desperate to put me back in my window of tolerance even though I wasn't out of it she just couldn't relate to me on my natural emotional level and assumed I was having a stress reaction (counselling profession really needs to get on board with ND).

I don't have any social markers for ASC at all. DH is on the spectrum and we are very different socially but also very similar in terms of black and white thinking, saying what we mean and missing social cues about expectations to obsfucscate what we are saying.

Meant to say am diagnosed, combined ADHD.

I think autism i wkmen doesnt always fit the male-orientated questionaire.

That said I score low on an asd questionaire when I answered it.... when I got a friend who has a lot of knowledge around autism to do it with me she was "what they mean by that is...."

Ithink I'm social. But its only when its on my terms, with people I like and ideally 1-1 small groups. She explained I didnt do social how the question meant it....

Your first few flags are all sensory. I only realised I had sensory issues when my son was diagnosed with SPD; loud noises, busy places, certain clothing/jewellery, have always bothered me but it was only when I learned about his diagnosis that I realised why.

I don’t know much about ADHD but recently I was diagnosed with late-onset ADD. I started drug therapy and it has been brilliant, I can focus and sleep and do all sorts of ordinary things now! 😂

Took a break from social media over the weekend but really good to come back and read all your messages. Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to post.

@FogLight I'm so glad the diagnosis and drug therapy has been helpful - that is very encouraging!

Hey, I found Tania Marshall’s info on ASD really helpful - she writes about the female presentation… maybe see if the descriptions on her website sound like you?

I'm 58 and have been referred for an ASD assessment (I think I may have ADD - is this assessed at the same time?). I was also diagnosed with ME 6 years ago.

Since my ME diagnosis I have lost contact with friends and never see anybody. This is partly because people just get on with their lives and lately because the effort of social contact is so draining for me (always has been, but more so now - I always used to force myself to make the effort).

Part of me is quite happy not trying to make contact with people and would be content never to have any contact with anybody - just me and my dogs. I get panicky when I have to deal with people - make GP/dentist appointments, etc. Another part of me feels guilty about this as this isn't how we're supposed to exist and sometimes, frankly, I'd love to have friends who I know cared for me.

Since being referred for ASD I've felt some relief and a bit of understanding of why I've never felt comfortable in my own skin. I've been wondering whether the ME is actually a result of decades of masking - trying to be somebody I'm not without being aware. I wonder whether my body and mind finally broke with the strain and gave up. Perhaps a bit of a niche question, but can anybody else relate?

Sorry, didn't mean to bhijack post - just stumbled across this interesting thread and it got me thinking, so I just posted... I'm new to Mumsnet and figuring out how it works! Not sure how to delete my comment, but I'll start a new thread.

@Pupinski Thanks for your post and sharing your experiences (you haven't hijacked at all). Sorry to hear that you are feeling isolated though. I'm afraid I know almost nothing about ME but it wouldn't surprise me at all if the exhaustion caused by years of masking took a toll in this way. I hope the ASD diagnosis means you can access some good support and start to understand a bit more about it all.

@AgingBadly thank you for the Tania Marshalls recommendation