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Neurodiverse Mumsnetters

Use this forum to discuss neurodiverse parenting.

What is your biggest sensory issue?

102 replies

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 20/01/2022 14:48

For me, it's sound. I struggle so much with noise, particularly unwanted music. I struggle in supermarkets and cafes.

In the house, it's usually quiet. We don't have a TV and we wear headphones if we're watching something on our devices so we don't disturb each other. My home is very peaceful.

I also struggle with feeling too hot and with my clothing feeling uncomfortable. Sometimes, I let myself get too cold because I can't face putting more clothing on then getting too hot. It's a constant struggle.

What do you all struggle with?

OP posts:
RunningInTheWind · 21/01/2022 11:24

This one’s probably a bit controversial for general MN - but I couldn’t breastfeed. The physical sensation was unbearable and made me want to simultaneously puke and scream.

Wineisoverrated · 21/01/2022 11:28

@RunningInTheWind

This one’s probably a bit controversial for general MN - but I couldn’t breastfeed. The physical sensation was unbearable and made me want to simultaneously puke and scream.
Not just you. I couldn’t either.

I expressed and we bottle fed (both formula and breast milk).

You do what works for you. Fuck what anyone else thinks.

jclm · 21/01/2022 11:35

This is extremely interesting - my son has SPD and I'm learning about his triggers and how these vary depending on that day's tolerance levels.

Mine is that I don't like feeling a heart beat... I'm squeemish though so don't think it's a sensory issue as such.

ABitOfAShitShow · 21/01/2022 12:26

Sounds - mostly misophonia style (I'm fine with loudness, music and white noise, etc.) and also, unexpected 'jarring' sounds like a door slamming (sends a weird 'shockwave' through my brain), shrillness/squealing (yes to it often being Americans) and conflicting/competing sounds going on at the same time.

Food texture - specifically meat. I spit quite a lot out (gross as it is). If it's particularly offensive, I vomit and/or I can't eat that thing again for a long, long time.

Like @sleepymum50, I also don't like gloomy rooms and hunger ruins my ability to concentrate.

I can't bear scratchy fabrics or labels but I don't know if that one's really my sensory issues or just ordinary discomfort.

What a bunch we are Grin

Alayalaya · 21/01/2022 12:44

I don’t have any of the physical sensory issues which are common with autism. Apparently this complicates my diagnosis because I should have them? 🤷‍♀️

But I do have huge problems with noise. It’s like my brain can’t operate on two channels at the same time. If there’s background music I can’t concentrate on work or a conversation. Offices where they play the radio are impossible for me, and when we had our kitchen fitted the builders radio drove me insane. I can’t listen to podcasts while I’m ironing because I end up either focusing on the ironing and not hearing the podcast, or listening to the podcast and burning the ironing. When I was a child my mother had me tested for deafness because I would be reading a book and wouldn’t hear her when she spoke to me. It gives a new meaning to the phrase ‘a one track mind’!

Light is also a problem. I don’t like bright overhead lights or direct sun. Another reason why I have problems with shared offices, because other people want light and don’t like having the blinds closed. I can’t wear dark glasses all the time so I had my normal glasses lightly tinted and that helps.

ofwarren · 21/01/2022 19:37

@Tdcp

Touching woolly or weird fabric, having the big light on which dp insists on ... Different kinds of noise at the same time, I can't think straight or understand anything! Eating certain things with the wrong utensils... Hair products, I tried curly girl then realised I can only have my hair naked! I've also cut it now, I always hated long hair and I didn't know why, turns out I can't stand being touched by it on my neck or whatever. I'm sure there's more !
I missed this about curly girl! I also tried it and its sensory hell. I too can only have naked hair.
AffIt · 23/01/2022 13:32

Light, noise and touch.

I wear sunglasses for about ten months of the year, which can look like a bit of an affectation in Scotland, but I don't care.

I don't like crowded spaces - from an executive processing PoV, I find it very difficult to compartmentalise sounds, so a packed bar or restaurant is my idea of hell and basically turns into a night of trying to inexpertly lipread.

(I get increasingly frustrated by the trend for 'industrial' spaces, which allow every single sound to echo and resonate without dampening.

Businesses are always incredibly keen to talk up their 'inclusion' creds, such as access for people with physical or mobility challenges - which I fully support - but nothing for ND people or those with hearing impairments, who find resonant sound literally torturous, in some cases?)

Probably not the right forum to admit this on, but children's noise - even high-pitched laughter - is like nails on a blackboard to me and can send me into full-on fight-or-flight mode (fortunately, as I've got older, I've managed to pare this back to just 'flight').

There are certain things which I physically cannot touch, such as wooden clothes pegs, and, in common with many ND (and quite a lot of NT) people, I don't like being touched by strangers: not because touching is verboten, but because strangers (unlike my OH or similar) don't know the 'right' way to touch me - always in my line of sight with quite a substantial degree of pressure.

I lived in East Asia for a while and was a huge fan of bowing as a greeting or acknowledgement, as it meant never having to face the possibility of a limp handshake or, worse, a hug.

Fallible · 23/01/2022 13:40

Too many people speaking at once, especially if there is also a TV or radio on at the same time. It makes me want to scream.

Over the last couple of years I have also developed a real aversion to any sort of perfumed smell. Perfumes, aftershave, scented household products, wax melts, scented candles etc, also glue and paint. They make my head ache and I get nauseated.

rosequartz8 · 23/01/2022 14:52

Any kind of noise especially sounds like whistling, people talking loudly on mobile phones etc. Also scratchy labels and fabrics, having an oily scalp and sensitive skin which drive me nuts, hot weather. They are just the ones I can think of offhand but there are probably lots more

Derrymum123 · 23/01/2022 15:06

Smells, especially stale body odours. Some strong perfumes also make me feel ill and give me a headache. Newly washed clothes that smell of fabric conditioner-how can they be rinsed properly? I know it is unreasonable, but I want laundry not to smell of anything, so I use soap nuts.
Chip pans that are cooling down. I can almost touch the stickiness and the smell lingers in the room. I only eat chips from the take out shop and try to eat them outdoors.

Marmelace · 23/01/2022 15:11

Layered noises, lights, material - clothing drives me mad, I never wear jewellery.

Marmelace · 23/01/2022 15:12

Oh things out of place, untidiness, being crowded, small places, people lol it would be easier to say what I'm OK with.

Marmelace · 23/01/2022 15:15

If I sit at a desk or table and it's full of stuff I tend to rattle till I melt down, it feels like I'm being throttled. I'm better with it as I'm getting older.

BlackeyedSusan · 23/01/2022 16:11

Noise scrapey plates. I am also getting monologued at again.

Followed by light touch.

HSHorror · 23/01/2022 16:22

Hairy brushing.
Smell. Im allergic to lots of stuff. But some non allergic ones make me feel sick.

Scautish · 23/01/2022 17:38

Light sensitivity - I wear tinted glasses indoors when lights overly bright. Generally always need to wear sunglasses outside in all but fullest of days

Sound/Noise

  • indoors more than one conversation or source of voice going on around me (my main meltdown trigger)
  • background music in the distance or through a wall. Fortunately live in countryside in detached house with lovely quiet neighbours

Touch
People touching me lightly like putting their hand on my arm
Anyone touching my head
But I’m absolutely fine with really forceful touch (I did judo/jujitsu and I absolutely loved being thrown really hard or sparring)

Smell and taste - I’m not sure anything than most people would object to such as general
Bad body related smells, and I have food likes/dislikes but I’m not really that fussy.

Some perfumes however make me really angry as they are so invasive.

AffIt · 23/01/2022 17:50

@scautish

Some perfumes however make me really angry as they are so invasive.

I get a weird rage reaction to Dior Poison, and I'm not sure why, because I generally love perfume - both on myself and on other people - and don't have any other olfactory triggers.

Ladybird909 · 23/01/2022 18:03

Definitely hair touching my face, reasonably ok with a bob but have to clip the side bits up, and as soon as it gets past a certain length then it's always tied up in a ponytail

Scautish · 23/01/2022 18:03

@AffIt

Poison is very strong but not worst offender for me. The worst for me are Calvin Klein Obsession or Opium (which my mum used to wear in the 80s and shed sometimes put it on in the car and it made me feel so sick but I couldn’t say anything).

There are others but I don’t know the name of them.

The thing is some perfumes I love. Not many but I can get obsessed with some scents. I don’t wear them often.

Iguessyourestuckwithme · 23/01/2022 18:09

Sound - jarring noises and different tempos and pitch all happening at the same time.

Texture of things like clay pots, chalk board and emery boards which make me physically retch.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 23/01/2022 18:10

Over the last couple of years I have also developed a real aversion to any sort of perfumed smell. Perfumes, aftershave, scented household products, wax melts, scented candles etc, also glue and paint. They make my head ache and I get nauseated.

I can't tolerate fragranced products, particularly air fresheners and those reed diffusers. One of the reasons I can't work in care homes anymore is because of them. The places are full of them. I end up with raging sinusitis and my eyes react (I have some corneal damage so can't risk this). I'm particularly resentful about these products because they gave me years of pain and misery whilst I was working. Days off spent in bed off my head on codeine and a hot water bottle over my face to try and relieve the pain.

OP posts:
Scautish · 23/01/2022 18:36

Can I also add modern jazz? It absolutely does my head in as there is no fucking rhythm and it’s pretentious, wanky shite and it annoys the heel out of me that it’s even considered remotely musical. Trad jazz is different.

In the late 1990s Pret a Manger used to play crap jazz all the time and I had to stop going there. It makes me so cross.

@BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation totally agree re artificial scents. Things like magic trees in cars and any glade monstrosity.

MangoLipstick · 23/01/2022 18:48

When people do that noisy sniffing/throat thing then swallow their snot. Other bodily functions/noises don’t bother me at all, but that one makes me physically gag everytime.

HerRoyalHappiness · 23/01/2022 18:57

Sound for me. I hate it. I can hear so much and I don't want to.

Light touch. But I like to be squeezed.

Clothes. PJs especially I have very specific needs for them. They must have a cuffed bottom and they must touch my ankles. I hate anything touching my ankles.

Certain smells. Tuna in particular. It makes me vomit.

Food textures. Can't have anything slimy (mushrooms I'm looking at you) , I like crunchy things the best.

MarmiteyCrumpets · 23/01/2022 19:00

Noise, especially low bass sounds like traffic. I dread the morning rush hour noise outside my window. Most contemporary pop and rap music.
Loud, high voices, eating and chewing sounds.
I once had a coworker who chewed gum very noisily all day and it was intolerable.

Bright sunlight or artificial light

Any seams, scratchy fabrics like wool, or tight clothing pressing against my body. Hair flopping around my face.

Artificial scents like air fresheners and many food smells.

I have fibromyalgia too and noise in particular sets it off.