Is a lack of music contributing to mental health problems in our teens?

[Om83]

So hear me out.. I have just rediscovered some long forgotten favourites from my youth… think 90’s indie, Brit pop, angst stuff.

the words really helped me through lots of emotions, big questions, - obviously Oasis have had a big resurgence recently so I’m a bit late to the party, but just found oasis little by little- ‘the wheels of your life have slowly fallen off…’ ‘I ask myself why am I really here’ and REM night swimming, so beautiful and reflective, just two example so many more. Stereophonics- completely forgot they existed!!. I know every word, every chord of these songs… the words were so much more meaningful back then and have seen me through tough times, like you could feel your angsty feelings and feel better that other people felt them too??

my kids are teens, and don’t really listen to music. We have it playing during dinner, on road trips, but other than the latest craze on TikTok not so much on their own. I feel so old saying it but most of the the music doesn’t seem to hit in the same way now and seems shallower somehow? (Obviously I am not the intended audience for much of it I realise!!)

it’s all about visuals now, less the audio. With music you are kinda alone sitting with your feelings and letting them go, whereas now they just scroll mindlessly through video clips. Music is powerful.

am I wrong to think that so much poor mental health in our kids is due to the fact there is less pouring their souls into music and lyrics to soothe and heal their troubles away??

@AngelinaFibres The majority had fun with music though. There’s always a few who take things too seriously!

I don't think that's particularly the point - are you saying that listening to music and thinking your parents can't possibly understand it is good for your MH in a way that enjoying music with your parents isn't? I think that's pretty bogus. Sure we had fun rebelling and indulging ourselves with how deep and misunderstood we were listening to The Smiths on repeat on our walkmans, but there's no more inherent value in that than in singing along with the family on a car ride.

I think another poster made the most insightful quote about how musicians can have MH problems so it's not a panacea. It can help and most humans need it and some love it, but it's not the differentiator between good and poor MH. Boringly exercise is probably more of a factor than being a diehard Oasis fan.

Mine listen to music a lot and from all genres spanning decades. They have much wider interests and hobbies that I ever did, as do their friends which seems positive for them all.

Mental heath issues are often complex. Lack of music isn’t a big cause.

There really is not a lack of music though. You might not enjoy it or listen to it, but basically every generation thought the “youth’s” music was shit.

Your teens will be in the minority if they just don’t listen to any music.

The Spotify algorithm would be customised to the adult though, and I can't see most teens enjoying the suggested next songs on the playlist for an average 40 year old.

People really need to think about the definition of social media when considering this ban. A lot of very normal safe stuff on the internet will get blocked for no good reason.

I was worried about that aspect- but there is still new music and new bands out there for teens to discover. My DC love 80s metal but also listen to current bands they discovered themselves. Problem is if they do happen to tour they are in smaller over 18s venues so for now for live gigs they have to stick to the big stadium acts which do tend to be more old school bands.

I’m one of the “car” posters 😊. My teen seeks out his own stuff, plays things to me that he’s found if he thinks I might like it, or not of it’s not my thing.

What I see and appreciate with my DC and their friends is that no eras, genres, styles are off limits or “uncool”. When I was 16 there are definitely things I wouldn’t have admitted to liking. They aren’t trying to fit into a certain musical mould.

No it didn’t.

Plenty of decent music around in the 1990s / 2000s and even into today.

My youngest dd is almost 18. She’s got a huge vinyl collection and plays guitar and steel drum. I regularly have a house full of her friends and they all play instruments and sing and it’s just lovely to see. They are all avid music fans and regularly go to gigs and live their best lives.

I think that music was much more glamorous in previous generations. Pop stars were real celebrities too and it was exciting to see them being interviewed or on TOTP. We wanted to see what they were wearing and copy it. No we have you tubers (no idea why they are popular) and tik tok, kids can follow that because they produce SO MUCH content. There is no need listen to the same record over and over if there is an infinite amount of new stuff... except I think that as kids get older they do actually enjoy the familiarity. My dd is happy when songs come on that remind her of primary school discos. She hums along with the stuff I used to play her on long drives etc. I remember hitting 17 or 18 and suddenly music was really important to me (and still is). Dd is happy to listen to all sorts and as another poster mentioned, she really loves musical soundtracks too..

My sons (17 and 20) are always listening to music, especially the 80's stuff. Its helped me through some dark times.

Music helps mental health but there isn’t a lack of music. Both DCs suffer w MH issues.
My DS is really into music (playing abd listening) and not modern stuff really. He meets others his own age who are of the same ‘vibe’ and he makes his own music too.
My DD when younger was really in to some indie/ip snd coming music - not so much now but around 16-18 there was a lot of gig going and connections made online through mutual likes of bands.

silent discos are another thing -people listening to music but only what they like and losing some of the human. Connection that you get when you people leap with joy at the same song. Human connection so may people struggle with

by removing discomfort from life - such as music we don’t like / we remove the things that bind us, we remove the ability to tolerate discomfort

Silent discos are fairly niche though, not causing any MH issues I don't reckon, and kids today have their share of discomforts. Also you've reminded me with the talk about human connection/leaping with joy - a lot of that in the 80s/90s was drink and drug-related, so no bad thing that teens aren't pilling their t*ts off at raves and getting into all kinds of scrapes in the name of human connection (oft gone by the morning after). Speaking for myself there, and course there are other vices to contend with now, but just making the point that there's always up and downsides to youth culture and ours wasn't necessarily any better or more mentally healthy just because we've made it through and look back fondly.

Totally agree, OP!

I was using it as an example of how intolerant of discomfort we are allowing / enabling ourselves to become ? A symptom as much as a cause ?

I clearly failed to have a misspent youth - I suspect as a bit older we were very cash limited. A half of cider isn’t going to much harm!

ha ha, maybe you were too early to get 2 litres of White Lightning extra strong cider for a quid or so.

My DC are always listening to music. Very very varied tastes too. Everything from Frankie Vallie to Ozzy via musical theatre, and indie bands no one has heard of.

DS2 has the worst MH of anyone I know. Actually that's a lie as a friend has schizophrenia. But his anxiety is awful. Won't leave the house on his own and so on.

Music hasn't made a difference.

What I think is different now from say the 90s or before is the lack of a music show on tv so that things like the charts dominate what is listened to. Even if there was a music show on BBC1 or ITV1 at a prime time slot, the tv audience is so much less than even ten years ago.

I think your kids are very much in the minority when it comes to not listening to music @Om83 . We were comparing the other day and 18yo DD spends about 5 hours a day listening through Spotify, and probably another hour most days on youtube, primarily listening to music. A lot of her friends are similar.

I think whats changed is that they don't have so much shared music. They've got so much available to them, that they have very little overlap with their friends.

When I was growing up in the 90s, there were about 10 or so "tribes". You had the people who liked pop, dance, grunge, britpop, nu-metal etc. Yeah, you had subdivisions in that, all the Oasis fans hated Blur and vice-versa, but they'd all at least heard the other bands albums.

DD doesn't have a tribe. Her music choices veer wildly over the course of an hours listening between genres and even decades. There's probably no-one on the planet with DD's general taste in music, let alone a tribe. And its the same for all her friends. There's points of contact, a song, an artist, but no shared love of genre.

So as a result they don't talk about music so much. We were forever talking about new albums we'd bought, lending them, sharing opinions or burning CDs for our friends, this generation does it less, because there's less common points of contact.

Its the same with TV, if I went into school and asked who watched Neighbours last night, half the class would start talking about it. Now, even if kids can find someone who's watching the same TV show, they'll still be at a different point in the series, so can't chat for fear of spoilers.

And I do think that it's a shame, that kids won't have a common media landscape like we grew up with. In 30 years time, they won't be able to bring up their equivalent of Mr Blobby and have everyone know what they're talking about.

Yeah all the MTV channels went too, but then music is all over youtube and other channels/platforms more popular with young people so again it's just different with pro's and cons. We had more of a shared experience but a lot of that was down to marketing and gatekeeping. Now there's much more diversity and breadth, but less of the shared experience. Mind you, TOTP was pretty shit by the end, all dance music with fewer true stars. it had had its moment.

I asked 13yo DD what music her friends are into this morning, with this thread in mind.

She told me about two of her best friends liking the music she's introduced them too, but both of them are old friends from primary.

I asked what about her school mates - she has a big group of girl friends in her class. She said she doesn't know what music they like.

That would have been inconceivable when I was 13! We all talked about music and bands at school, what we'd seen on TOTP, which bands we thought were best, what new bands we'd discovered, which boy band members we fancied etc etc.

Young people's relationship to music has changed, it's much more individualistic I think and much less often a badge of identity.

Interesting idea... there definitely seems to be a big difference in how many kids listen to music now, or don't, compared to how we did as kids. It could have an effect on MH but I don't think would be a major issue.

There seem to be fewer cohesive 'scenes' and social media means that kids often like a song in 'isolation' - like they know how it goes but they don't even necessarily know or remember who it's by. So you get a scenario when a band can have a song blow up massively online, but their other singles get no attention because no one remembers who the 'big' song was by once it's peaked. It's just 'that song'.

My 17yo oldest loves music generally but is not part of any 'scene'. They listen to quite a big array of stuff - they particularly like folk and punk/pop by LGBTQ+ artists but I don't think music taste is a big thing in friend groups, which is probably a good thing mostly. They don't go to many gigs. My 14yo son likes Madness, Bowie, Michael Jackson but claims to hate all contemporary music and never listens to music other than sometimes video game soundtracks.

My kids are massively into music and don't have mental health problems but I'm not sure there's a connection. Plenty of people with depression listen to music.
What makes you think all young people listen to rubbish on tik tok and not proper music? Ours go to loads of gigs and listen to a wide range of music.

Interesting idea but I don’t identify at all with teenagers not listening to music. All three of mine do - all the time. Two of them play guitar and are in bands so it’s a massive part of our family life. My 16 year old just said to me the other day he can lose three hours of his life just listening and getting absorbed in music. I’m not convinced it’s true that most kids don’t listen to music.