@personanongrata
Hi Misha, I know (from Google, obviously!) that you have children.
What has your advice been to them about sharing personal info via Facebook etc? Is there one absolutely essential thing all parents should be doing vis-a-vis their children's online security, or is that too simplistic?
I read that some children are creating multiple accounts on social media sites, so their parents see the 'official' one but they're busy doing their real networking under other guises (today's equivalent of getting changed at the bus stop, I guess).
I suppose I'm asking how high in the panoply of parental anxieties online security should come!
Thanks in advance.
The kids issue!
First - we must always remember that children have grown up with the environment of the Internet as a given. It is as natural to them as playing in the park or hanging out at shopping malls.
This means that they possess an instinctive feel for the Internet and its immense potential, entertainment and educational value that their parents lack.
Let us take one critical issue which governments (under pressure from the music and film industries) have attempted to regulate heavily through legislation - the downloading of music and movies.
In theory, this is illegal in this country and subject to really tough penalties. In practice, I know of nobody under the age of 35 who does not understand it as their right and perfectly natural to download anything they want from the Internet for free.
This is unstoppable and as one friend remarked to me recently, 'Darwinism is not about the strongest or most cunning surviving, it is about the most adaptable.' And we have to adapt to the fact that kids will increasingly refuse to buy music, films or books but download them. I say this as somebody who makes his living from intellectual production and so know that even at my old age, I am going to have find something else to do.
And now another thing about Facebook. Your kids will generally not let you look at their Facebook. You may want to insist but similarly you may not be able to face the resulting tantrums, not to mention the now habitual rhetoric of human rights and privacy that they throw in your face.
Recently, however, my 19 year-old daughter went missing en route between my home and her mother's. At 1 in the morning I got a call from my ex-wife explaining that she hadn't turned up as agreed and did I know where she was as she was travelling aboard at the crack of dawn.
I checked her room and her unpacked suitcase and passport was there. Her phone was off and she hadn't been answering messages since early afternoon.
I decided to hack her Facebook account - in order to do this, I guessed that she uses the same password as she has done for years (and which she had once revealed to me). Bingo! I was in.
The first thing I would say is how stunned I was by the number of her friends (about 50%) were trolling about the Internet at 2.30 on a Monday morning - they just sit their all night moaning about stuff, giggling and doing general teenage stuff.
But I put out a message explaining that I was her Dad and I needed to contact her urgently. It worked - she was checking her messages...she was just too embarrassed to fess to her parents that she was with some boy. However, as soon as she realised, I had got into her Facebook account, she got in touch with my ex.
On the one hand, she was livid that I had hacked her Facebook (it might teach her to vary her passwords - I hope so) - on the other hand, she knew that she had caused her parents incredibly distress.
But fundamentally, kids see the Internet as a private zone from which their parents, ABOVE ALL, must be excluded. What they don't know is that their habits are attracting all sorts of other people with far less benign intentions that their parents!