HOLY FRICKING COW WITH BELLS ON - I'M HAVING TWINS.

[Schmauskin]

Very freaked out by the news and the fact I coped so badly when my dd 4.5 yr old was tiny, through the lack of sleep - God knows how I'll do it with twins AND the school run. I've also got to relocate from LA to the UK before the birth just to add to the stress. What I need is advice, so I can prepare myself. What twin pram/buggy to buy, breast feeding advice, anything that will help inform me and get me prepared. Emotionally and psychologically I'm f*ed up about the prospect, so I may as well be organised and practically prepared.

Thank you.

Congrats on your pregnancy. Like you I completely freaked out when I found out I was having twins. I cried and cried and had to have a week off work to adjust to the news and not burst into tears when I told people! My girls are now almost 18 months and pure joy. I truly wouldn't have it any other way now. They are the best of friends and play together really well. Often I get comments from my singleton mum friends that 'twins are easier as they will entertain each other', while their child clings to them and wants them to play with them all day long. I breastfed them for 12 months, which I didn't enjoy, but did it as I felt it was the best thing for them. Looking back now I'm really glad I did as they were never sick and I never had to worry about sterilising hundreds of bottles as they went straight to cups. I had a twin nursing pillow and did them both at the same time for every feed initially. As they got older and faster I would occassionally do them seperately - particularly if we were out. I was always quite strict (still am really) about keeping them in the same routine for sleeps and feeds etc. We have the Mountain Buggy Urban pram and I love it. It fits through all standard doorways and is easy to push. You could take that pram anywhere - we take it to parks, off road, the beach and shops! If I had twins again though I would definitely get the carrycot as it would be nice to be facing them when they are tiny. Hope this helps a little. You really will be fine. I actually think having your older child will make life a little easier as you will not be going into the parenting thing completely blind like I was. It was hard learning the ropes on two, but you will use all your experience with your first child to help you. Best of luck.

Sooo glad I posted on here ladies, I am feeling very much calmer now thanks to al your encouragement.

Hoochie - hijack away, no worries.

accessorizequeen & EsmeWatson, I was thinking more of the 2 smaller carrycots, rather than the mammoth one for 2. My rationale was it'd be lighter/easier to lift and if 1 twin woke it wouldn't disturb the other if they were in seperate carrycots. My twins are conceived through IVF with a donor egg, so not identical, so I'm thinking they don't have the same need as identicals to snuggle together. (God, does that make me sound like a harsh bitch?)

Whaddya think?

Schmauskin, glad you're feeling better, part of it is just getting used to the idea and not panicking.re: mb carrycots, depends where you want to take them, I just put them on the frame and left them there. They slept together in a cotbed (still do!) upstairs for some naps and I just carried them up. Never found it a problem. I don't have identicals btw, but having them sleep together day and night is absolutely lovely. They outgrew the single carrycots by 8 weeks although mine were born at 39 weeks so quite large . And really annoying putting on two aprons and two raincovers all the time.

Hoochie, I think dairy intolerance fairly rare though isn't it?I'm kind of finding hard to cope now without changing my diet, it's so difficult to get time to eat and I do rely heavily on cheese sandwiches! Taking ds3 to dr this arvo to ask about reflux but I guess I'm not as committed to breastfeeding because I'm using formula a bit anyway, I don't have time to express with two other children to look after as well. Not having a good day as ds3 been screaming and fussing on every feed. And even if I solved that, the nipple shields make it impossible to tandem feed. Sorry to hijack again, schmau

accessorizequeen, really good tip about the Easywalker Duowalker - much cheaper than the MB here in the US so will look into it.

Amby baby nest hammock thing? thinking of buying 2 if they are as fab as the product reviews on here suggest, any twin mums done this?

You are only 7 weeks Schmauskin, I'm sure you've got time to buy the buggy

Hoochie, dp took ds3 to the gp today and she said possibly has reflux but no point giving him gaviscon really, suggested that I give up if stress is too much and god knows I feel like it after battling him today. But occurs to me he's only been fussing for a couple of weeks (the vomiting is par for the course since he was born, but the other ds's were the same) and I've been eating chocolate over christmas so I will try not eating any this week and see if things improve. I gave up choc with ds2 because he was v.windy. Also could be thrush, but apparently gp didn't check his mouth (knew I should have gone but had to feed dd!). DD is producing very dark green poos so something up with both.

Indeed I have, however I am emigrating back to the UK in 14 weeks which will fly by...

of course I didn't find out I was having twins until 17 weeks so left all of this until the absolutely last minute.
BTW, there is an organisation in the UK called Homestart, I have a volunteer who comes for 2 hours a week & sits with the dt's whilst I vacuum or cook etc or just have a nap. Worth looking into once you're here?
hope haven't put you off with tales of bf'ing problems, just a bit hard at present but bottle feeding would be harder imo!
There's a really good book which has an american bias by La Leche League, Mothering Multiples I think, might be easy to get hold of whilst you're there. Most comphrehensive one I've read thus far & I really liked the style of it too, very pro-breastfeeding!

I will look into Homestart for sure, thanks, as we'll only have my 85 year old mum to help, unless we cripple ourselves financially with a maternity nurse/nanny.

accessorizequeen -based on what happened with my dd1 it does sound a lot like reflux. Terrible that your gp suggested you give up bf - that's your decision and not for her to say. Obviously it's not worth it if you are suffering with the stress of it but surely better your gp gets to the root of the problem. I gave up bf as dd1 wouldn't latch and we had all of the throwing herself around, the constant battle etc with both of us ending up howling whereas dd2 was really easy and just took to it. It was only later we got the reflux diagnosed and treated and I'm sure that's where all of her problems with feeding stemmed from. I'm not saying you should rush out and insist on gaviscon but we have found it helped enormously. Well done you on feeding your twins so far - am full of admiration.

Sorry to hijack further, but just a thought... maybe if you do go back to dr's you should take ds3 rather than dp taking him? I'm not suggesting he's useless and nor is my dh but he took dd1 the first time and it was only when I took her back to see the same dr that we ended up with a diagnosis and treatment, not because I wanted her to be on gaviscon - was really quite reluctant - but because as the gp herself said I described the symptoms more clearly... does that make sense? Sorry, if not. Glad you're feeling more in control of things Schmauskin - I reckon you'll be just fine

you're absolutely right twinmam, should have gone myself but feeling so tired I didn't think I could take anything in that day (he went with ds1 as well who has various issues). She said Gaviscon would only help with the vomiting, not the flapping around beforehand though. Haven't had chocolate lately and he's improving, only takes a couple of minutes to calm him down rather than 10 or 15. Hoochie, wouldn't the dairy intolerance show with diarroheah (I can never spell it...) as he has no probs there.

Schmauskin, yes do take advantage of free help! Also try colleges nearby when you do move as often those on childcare courses need placements. We have a part-time nanny and she's 7 pound an hour plus NI etc, but suspect prices in other parts of the UK higher than that. Just to give you an idea. What you'll really need is help for the school runs ideally esp in the early weeks - if you can get someone anyone to cover a few of those will really help as trying to get two babies fed, dressed & out the door for 8ish is nigh on impossible at times!Really just someone in the house to stay with them whilst you do school run or someone to take your dd to school is enough.

Poor you - def sympathise with the being too tired thing! IMHO treating the reflux, if that's what your ds is suffering from would probably help the flapping around...? That's what seemed to happen with dd1 although it was a long while between me giving up bf and finally getting the reflux sorted. Am now convinced that her fighting me when I tried to feed her was down to her being so uncomfortable and bottle feeding more successful because she was more upright. Great advice re getting extra help - had no idea getting a part time nanny could work out so cheap. Would have researched it myself had I known. Also Homestart - wish I'd known about them!!

accessorisequeen - I'll be delivering (God willing) in July when school's out so I guess I'll be able to recover a bit before the Autumn term, however I anticipate dH doing the morning school run for ever.

Yeah, the help makes all the difference twinmam, I asked on mumsnet what help would be best (my dad offered to pay for help for a year, bless him or we wouldn't have any!). DS3 has been just the same with bottles we've noticed so definitely not my diet that's the issue (yay, cheese!)

Schmauskin, that's excellent getting a routine in place before school starts. DP only does one school run a week, luckily I have my mum and stepdad who do a couple as well. I'm dreading the start of school again this week though, sigh. Are you originally english and moving back or relocating?

We're both Brits - been in LA 2 years and hate it, so moving back to the English countryside.

Hello Schmauskin, welcome to our world!
I have the urban mountain buggy and had the 2 carrycots - they were fab and we love our buggy.
Just wanted to say hello really

congratulations.
i have no good advice, as m1 have one and dont know what im doing most of the time lol
but
i wish you all the best

Wow schmauskin.

What great news about your pregnancy. You'll cope fine, you just do ( I say this confidently for you as we happen to live in an area where twins are 10 a penny. Ds at last count had 8 sets as friends) It can't be that bad as most of them went on to have another baby.

There'll be loads of practical advice given here for you too.

Hope you have areally happy pregnancy.