Am I the only one who finds this hard??

[xkatyx]

hello everyone,

I have 12 week old identical twin girls!!

I'm finding them so difficult and today has been awful like most days if I'm honest!

They cry all the Time, I have been to the doctors and HV there on gaviacon I have made there feeds every 3 hours, I go out in the pushchair all day just walking around just for some peace and quiet but as soon as u stop they start off again :(

I'm exhausted from it I really really am, I can feel the tears building up as I write this.
I thought it would get easier the older they got but it's got worse as there awake more and web awake just cries cries cries. They only sleep for like 15 minutes at a time .. They have a routine which they have followed since birth at bed time the usual bath, milk bed.

I was walking up the school to pick up my other 2 dc and a mother who has twins (now 4) said to me god aren't twins easy her words exactly were "piece of p**s.
I said no not really I'm finding it a challenge an she just went on and on how she found it easy!

So what is wrong with me :( what am I doing wrong, I have 3 other dc and never had this :(

katy, one of the twin mums I know in RL has managed to find a local student who comes along for an hour at bathtime a couple of times a week to help out, I think she charges normal babysitting rates. Could that be worth looking into?

Ideally an au pair would be perfect for you, I think they normally cost £70 per week for 5 hours childcare per day, but with 5 kids I doubt you have the room (and it might be like having a 6th child at first anyway!)

Hi everyone, well the girls are 14 weeks Tom and they have turned a very big corner :) they are a delight!!! I honestly don't know what has changed or what I did but they are staying in there routines and only cry when hungry or tired!!

Thank u all for u help and advice
Xx

Thats great! Maybe it was colic or something and just passed on its own. But who cares what it was if its all better now x

Yes thankfully it has passed, they have settled really well into there day routine now so sleep same times through day too I don't know of it's just once try passed 3 months, but Grateful. Poor little things have a awful cough at the moment but are still happy :)

Oh Katy sorry this is a bit late but just saw this and had to let you know you are so not alone. I have 11 week old ds twins both with reflux and it has been just awful. I too would be in tears all day and so fed up with the crying. It really does get better I swear to you it does and I hope you are already finding that out now. For me it got better when they got a little bit better but mainly when I just started to accept I would always be carrying a baby around its hard to get a routine with reflux yet everyone seems to think you should have one? I was at the baby clinic at the height of all the crappiness the reflux/colicky symptoms, and after sitting there quietly but being stared at like a freakshow this girl announced really loudly 'my sister had twins she said they were waayyy easier than one'. What?!? How could they ever be? I wanted to ask her what she would do when both babies cried (which as you know can happen all day) but I snapped and vicked her! It does get better hang in there even if its by a very fine thread youll be patting on the back yourself sooner than you think you go girl you are doing such a great job you really are pm if you want to chat it helps I know Im still there with you a little.

Hi
Just seen this post and although it's a bit late just thought I'd post for anyone looking at this whilst going through a tough time, firstly what that lady (for want of a better word) a Pratt even if her two were really easy, most twin mothers are more supportive. My twins are now four and at school I'm a health visitor and had good support from my mum and DH but still found it really exhausting my little girl was poorly and my son wanted to be permanently attached to my nipple! What helped me was going for walks come rain or shine and making friends with another twin mum whilst pregnant as it can be isolating as you often don't want to go to groups with two demanding babies, saying that now they are a delight although presently winding each other up whilst DH driving!

I have to say that there are a very few Mums of twins out there who claim it to be an easy ride and I have found them to be really unhelpful and undermining. Why they can't just keep their thoughts to themselves I cannot understand since for 99.5% of Mums of twins their position is an almost impossible one, especially in the early days. Dealing with the sleep deprivation caused by twins alone is one of the most challenging things anyone could ever experience in life. There is a reason that twin Mums have a special understanding/bond - because anyone who hasn't gone through it themselves cannot possibly imagine how incredibly, incredibly tough it is. Don't let the 0.5% who are either deluding themselves/horribly unsupportive or lacking in empathy/very, very lucky (probably all 3 at the same time!) allow you to feel you're not doing the best you can under very trying circumstances - ignore them!!

I have to say that there are a very few Mums of twins out there who claim it to be an easy ride and I have found them to be really unhelpful and undermining. Why they can't just keep their thoughts to themselves I cannot understand since for 99.5% of Mums of twins their position is an almost impossible one, especially in the early days. Dealing with the sleep deprivation caused by twins alone is one of the most challenging things anyone could ever experience in life. There is a reason that twin Mums have a special understanding/bond - because anyone who hasn't gone through it themselves cannot possibly imagine how incredibly, incredibly tough it is. Don't let the 0.5% who are either deluding themselves/horribly unsupportive or lacking in empathy/very, very lucky (probably all 3 at the same time!) allow you to feel you're not doing the best you can under very trying circumstances - ignore them!!

my twins are now 19 years old and i can honestly say that it was THE most horrendous experiance of my life. - no one can understand.

i found that i actually LIKED them when they were about 3 - i really liked then when they were about 5.

small comfort now, but they are awesome.

i swear i hate babies, 19 years later and i hear a certain tone of a cry in public and it send horrible shivers down my spine. this is not melodrama.

its fucking aweful. but it gets better.

if you ever want to sound off - just message me - i really do understand not liking your babies even though you love them. i know what its like to walk out of the room becuase the crying is so frustrating - and then cry and cry

I've not read the whole thread, will come back just putting the twins to bed. But I just wanted to say hold on in there.

Oh and well done for not lamping the other woman, I have 20 month twins and a 5 yo DS and I find it hard.

Do I have this right and you have 5 children in total? I know everyone will have different children and some will be easier than others but you have 3 children under 2 plus another two, that is really hard work caring for newborns and balancing that with the needs of your other children. So its not you and it will get easier. The other woman may well have only two children in total but I doubt even then it was piss easy.