mixed race family - where to live outside of london?

[expecting]

Having a real dilemma so please help me out. Want to leave London so we can afford a house but want to stay South. Don't mind so much if area isn't multicultural so long as it's inhabitants are liberal minded. Been considering areas by Essex coast such as Leigh-on-sea or Westcliff but open to suggestions.

We live in Medway, in Kent. Varied mix of people and even the old folk seem pleased to see us. DW was very worried about this when pregnant. I'm white and have less experience of this so wasn't as aware as she. She's glad we made the move from East London.

Hi there (first time posting on mumsnet so bit nervous!) - just thought I'd put my penny's worth in too and give the vote for Glastonbury. DH (who's Nepali) and I moved from south London 3 years ago and we love it (he more than me perhaps) as it's a very alternative community with lots of people from all over the world and if they are of English origin, then they've usually done lots of traveling and/or very liberal. It has a really nice community feel too. Surrounding area is similar and I've heard that Totnes in Devon is similar too although I've never been. It's such a shame that mixed race families feel they have to stay in the big cities, as living in the country side is much nicer! (PS - did anyone watch that excellent program about Britian's only black farmer?)

This is awful, I really didnt think that you hand pick your area to live to avoid racism.

I know what i would bloody well do if I was that worried I would definitly find a Country more tolerant.

Those of you in mixed marriages, would it be better to live in the country of your partners origin to avoid such racism? Just wondering how it works the other way. I just cant imagine feeling that afraid and would seek a quieter existance in peace.

Can't recommend a place to go but please, avoid York.

Yes, I see but where is his family originally from?

wouldn't look out of place at all in Southampton

Tena, racism goes both ways and is present in every single country, you only realise the full extent once you become a minority especially if you go to live in a place where people is not used to see people from other places.

In defense of Britain I can say that this is one of the most multicultural societies and is well ahead of other countries in term of society integration.

Depends on how bad the problem is I suppose. Shouldnt see the move as a negative if you can escape the racism. Families visit for holidays, an adventure or a challenge to start a fresh hassle free life. Sounds blooming marvellous to me.
Has all his family since time began been in the UK?

But sally, if having eggs thrown at my door, or being on the receiving end of racism is the way to educate them... no thanks!

Yep, totally agree with that, but it doesnt seem to be working does it, I cant imagine why it continues.

I suppose with the benefit of maturity on my side (45 next week) I would rather move on that fight. I used to fight but as you get older you realise the only one losing is you and that life is too short.

I still vote to have a happier, easier trouble free life if I could find it. (course it cant be totally be trouble free) There are some things that you can do by not trying to face things head on.

'move on than fight'

Oh, that I understand, actually if we had a lot of money and the free choice to go anywhere we wanted I would go to.... London. Love the place!

Well Sally, This has been going on for many years already and I really havent witnessed anything getting better. Ok there are laws in place and political correctness to try and protect ethnic minorities. These only come into play when its a major incident.

But sally, if having eggs thrown at my door, or being on the receiving end of racism is the way to educate them.

But Chandra - that doesn't just happen to people from different ethnic origins. We had that happen when we moved "down south" from yorkshire when I was younger. We weren't 'welcome' - because we were different because of our accents.

Interestingly when DH and I first moved to Wellingborough we could only afford a house in a poorer part of town - very multicultural, next door neighbours (who'd been there since the houses were built in the 50's !) were blacks originally from Mauritius (oooo the smells of cooking that came from their house were divine), and mixed race couples were everywhere.

Within 1 month of us moving in DH found a Swastica painted on the bonnet of our car, and we suffered lots of abuse. Eggs, flours and stones thrown at the house. The bin set on fire (as it was put outside for collection the day we'd just had a brand new fence put up - thankfully fence and brand new shed survived). Don't know if it was particularly 'race' based (apart from the Swastika) as DH never had any comments directed at him, and the comments I receieved when out with the DS's weren't racial in content.

Thankfully we were able to afford to a 'better' area of town 2yrs later, much more 'middle class' - lots of white families and LOADS of eldery people. We've been here for 2yrs now and have had absolutely no trouble at all!

Sorry, last reply to Sally's 10:53 post

Chandra, London? Arrrrgh I cant think of anywhere worse. Crime, drugs, filthy air. Now dont get me wrong this is the place of my birth but I HATE IT!!!

Those of you in mixed marriages, would it be better to live in the country of your partners origin to avoid such racism? Just wondering how it works the other way.

Doesn't really work the other way - not IME. Just like here in the UK - if you're lucky you'll be fine, and if you're not - you'll pay for it [frown]