I don’t have enough money for food for the rest of the month

[Tiredasamf]

I know there’s lots of threads about this at the moment. But what the hell is going on. What is the world coming to. I’m stressing out!

we’ve lived quite comfortably for the last few years - not wealthy at all, working class family (total income of around £2,700 a month after tax) but have always been able to afford all bills, food, clothes etc for the kids and always done 1-2 days out a month, and been able to save a little.

with the rising costs of everything we are now in a situation where we’re struggling.

as of today, I don’t have enough money for the food shops for the rest of the month. Bills are all paid and there shouldn’t be any extra expenses this month. It’s just food shops and petrol left

we’re literally going to have to eat beans on toast or other things equally as cheap.

if it’s going to be like this every month I don’t know what we’ll do. How are we going to afford Christmas? No more days out, no more fun things, no treats, no new clothes (kids are young and grow so fast so that’s a necessity that we can’t even afford now)

It’s set to get worse too isn’t it. what the hell? What are you doing to save money or cut costs? Please give me all your advice

Agree with others who say you need to work around DH

Ideas to save money:
-Switch supermarkets- if you don’t already shop in Aldi or Lidl, make the switch. We save about £30 a shop switching from Asda.
-Buy frozen fruits instead of fresh for kids snacks/breakfast.
-Frozen joints and veg are good to have in the freezer for the end of the month when cash is low and you want to limit food shops.
-If you own your phone handsets switch to a SIM only contract for £5-10 a month instead of paying the higher contract rates.
-Call your TV cable/SKY provider and renegotiate or downgrade your package to save you money each month. We saved £40 a month doing this.
-Make a spreadsheet of your monthly bills and examine each one. Note the date the contract ends or is due for renewal so you can search for better deals in advance.

Christmas/things to do cheap or free:
-Charity shops are great for little kids. We’ve had great jigsaw puzzles and books for £1.
-Gumtree/FB Marketplace/Freecycle can be good places to check for things you need.
-Half term is coming up and lots of places let kids eat for £1, some don’t require any additional purchases.
-If you live near a park or wooded area, going on a nature walk is fun. Collect leaves to paint, greenery to make a table centrepiece.
-Take DC to the local library. Ours do a story time and a rhyme time once a week. They also have Lego club, craft club on in school holidays. All are free events.

Hope some of this is useful to you OP.

I just switched to First Direct for a free £175. It's been paid out within 2 weeks. Some banks make you stay for 6 months before pay out, so do check first

@FistFullOfRegrets I’m sure they would but from experience those lovely 6 month olds keep turning into tantruming 3 year olds. I think they may limit how often you can exchange.

(sorry OP, got to take the laughs where you can these days, not trying to make light of your situation)

There are a tonne of feed your family for £20/£30/£40/£50 etc a week videos on YouTube (or even less) that you could take a look at. Even if it’s for inspiration! We spend £55 on food a week - 2 adults and 1 DS. They‘ve helped me cut my food bill from £75. Best of luck xx

I was going ask if you are sure you are doing your tax returns properly, have the right tax codes and are using all your allowances? Are you claiming your entitlements? I have no idea what child benefit is available now as my dc are long grown up, but do check.

Sorry you're in this position, OP. We live in one of the wealthiest countries in the world, in 2022 - nobody should have to rely on fucking food banks. Food banks should not be normalised. This is nothing to do with Putin or Covid. This is shit management of the country by a corrupt and incompetent government. Please all remember this at the next election. I am heartbroken for so many people.

Can you do babysitting? Around here it’s easily £10 per hour. A weekly evening or 2 would create a decent food shop amount

With regards to "affording Christmas "- breathe!
It's one day, with food. Just like any other day. It doesn't have to be turkey and all the trimmings. It doesn't have to be the living room knee deep in presents.
Choose a meal that the family love, and has no wastage. Buy one good present rather than 50 small ones.
Spend TIME with your family, not money.

We are on almost exactly the same amounts as you and your husband but only 1 child. Weve spent a bit of time working out our expenses and seeing where we can save money, for example we don't pay dd to the gas/electric, we give them Meter readings and pay for what we've used. We bulk bought lentils and use them to bulk out most meals (as pp said Dahl is really cheap and tasty, or use then in veg soup to add protein for some energy). I only buy things for the baby off Facebook marketplace (free is better!) and we don't pay to go for days out - walks in local woods, time in the park or garden, free events (fb is also good for finding these). Good luck op!

How much do you have left and how many kids do you have? Maybe we can help with some creative meal planning.

Evening job is the only way to bring in more cash tbh. It's crap cos you'll be knackered, but if needs must - it doesnt need to be every night, even 8 hours a week will mean c£320pcm in your hand cos youll be below NI and tax level.

I used to work 2 jobs - full time day job and 30 hours night work in a pub. Admittedly I didn't have kids at the time, but I did this for a few years until I finally changed my permanent job and then got into my career.

I worked nights and Dh worked days when dc were small. We couldn’t afford childcare but couldn’t afford not to work.

I used to do the 4-8am shift in the local supermarket to make ends meet, dh would be waiting in the car park with the dc to hand (throw) them over to me so he could then get to work. I would go to bed at 8pm with the kids to get some sleep.
It was good money and I also got 10% off my shopping.
Care homes also often do a twilight shift (8pm to midnight roughly) that might fit around the kids.
So many care and hospitality jobs are available just now I'm sure if you called round and said "look these are the hours I can do to fit around dc" you would get something.
My job I'm in just now I give them my availability months in advance and they work my shifts around it so I don't need childcare.

For right now though maybe list what’s in your cupboards and freezer and we can help make anything you’ve got stretch.

It's really shit OP. I know several people in your situation who have children small enough to not get 30 hours who are hugely struggling at the moment.

Can you sell some outgrown kids clothes to get some money to buy some second-hand ones in the next size?

How much do you spend on food at the moment? Where do you shop? What kinds of things do you eat - are there cheaper alternatives?

Have you gone through all your outgoings carefully to work out if there's anything, anything at all, that you can cut? E.g. does DH buy lunch at work? Can he wfh sometimes to save on commuting costs? If you list them here than perhaps we could help.

We also have monthly toy and clothes exchanges where we live (up to 18), you can go along and lots of stuff is still new with tags!

Yes. it is only one day - one main meal plus a smaller second meal plus a few treats.
Make sure your family know that you will not be buying any adult presents this year, for environmental reasons as well as being skint.

But given the DC ages, I disagree about getting one good present. Don't get them ANY 'good' (i.e. pricey) presents - at that age they have no idea how much things cost. Get several very cheap presents as it is all about the pile and the unwrapping, preferably toys in over-sized boxes as they tend to think bigger is better.

And while times are very tough now, that is only to be expected with two under-school age. Remind yourself it will all change in a few years.

Wow, thanks everyone for the responses and for being so kind!

I’m having a shitty day today so haven’t the headspace to respond to everyone but to answer a few things:

We do claim universal credit, we get around £100 a month but that varies depending on our income ie if DH does more private jobs we don’t get that. I will look into whether they would help with childcare costs

I’ve been keeping an eye on any job adverts for evening work and have asked everyone I know. The trouble is I have 2 DC in school too, so wouldn’t be able to start until 5 and also need to factor in time to sleep as youngest DD wakes at 4.30. DH goes to night school twice a week. So 5pm-10pm or something 3 days a week would work but haven’t found anything with those hours yet. DH often works weekends too.

DH can’t walk or cycle, he works in a trade so goes in his van (another petrol cost!) luckily he paid the van outright when we were better off so haven’t got to pay monthly for that

The only debt we have is a loan we got a few years ago to cover old debts my DH had, we’re paying £200 a month for that.

We don’t have gym memberships, National trust, subscriptions other than Netflix, or anything like that. I’ve been through our finances and the only thing I can see we could cut down on is my phone bill when it expires next year.

I’m gonna get told off for this but no we don’t have a pension, literally can’t afford to put into one. We also don’t save at the moment. We have an emergencies fund with about £500 in, which is just for emergencies. (Yes having no money for food is an emergency so we will have to use it and hope the car doesn’t break down in the next few months!)

As we have that emergency fund I won’t be using a food bank unless that runs out and we’re still struggling

love all the advice about food and days out that’s really helpful thank you. I will dig out my old slow cooker recipe book and we will definitely be eating less meat. We love going for walks so will have to find some local free places to adventure instead of our usual days out.

It’s just all so depressing isn’t it, having to now scrimp and save and the constant worry about being able to provide for the family when only a few years ago we were living comfortably on the exact same wage package.

I’m a huge Vinted lover! I made £60 last month selling DC’s old clothes. I also buy a lot of their stuff on there, there’s very little I buy brand new now and the stuff I do is from supermarkets.

Christmas is really worrying me. Yes it’s only one day and it’s about spending time together, not gifts. But we all know for children the joy is in the magic of Christmas and that’s hard to create with no money. We also have youngests birthday just after Christmas too.
Last year we went through a really horrible time over Christmas and the day was pretty much cancelled, so I really want to make it lovely for them this year which is why I’m feeling the pressure about that!

If you have board games crack them open. Get the kids to help with making dinner. We've done everything from the full works, to reindeer meat, to beige oven buffet, to Christmas themed pizza in the past. You don't have to go traditional. You could do food with a twist to keep the cost Dow but still be special.

Santa is there for the magic. Milk him for all you are worth with things like a carrot, hearing bells, norad santa, writing letters etc. Magic comes cheaply if you use your imagination and inspire your kids.

Don't buy tonnes of toys. At that age, they don't care about the material stuff. Honestly remember that the box is THE most exciting thing ever at age 2/3. Second hand books are a good bet and can be found cheaply.

Memories ate the stuff Christmas is made of. Not presents nor food

My parents used to drag Christmas day out by hiding all the presents around the room. We had to go find one for us at a time. It meant we always sat watched everyone else open presents and appreciated our own more. Plus the hiding thing made it all into a game. (it doesn't matter how badly you hide presents - it's part of it - just remember to write down how many presents you've hidden as we always missed one, which was subsequently found on boxing day with amusement every year without fail)

Above all, it's not a competition. Don't compare your Christmas with others.

If you can afford maybe a cheap popcorn maker (I got mine from aldi) for the whole family to snuggle up with duvets in front of the TV to watch a family movie. Popcorn itself is about a pound a bag and goes loads further than other snacks. It can then be used in the further.

I think the thing for you to keep in mind is your family circumstances and outgoings are likely to improve significantly in a year or so. That's not the case for everyone.

You can make this Christmas work.

@RedToothBrush thank you. Love the idea about hiding presents! The older 2 tend to rip through them all and it’s over in about 5 minutes so this sounds like a great way to spread it out.

I need to get my head out of this negative space and get working on solutions, it’s just hard at the moment and not where I imagined us to be this year!

Do you have any family or a friend nearby that would do evening baby sitting on the nights your husband is out so that you can get evening work , it should be relatively easy to find something at least until Christmas . Also look at supermarket garages , we have a Tesco garage near us that is always advertising for staff and very peculiar shifts , likewise online shopping packing people is often overnight but not starting until 10 and finishing at 6 so that may work .

How many kids do you have OP? If there’s only one not yet in school then you should be able to get a school hours job and still be financially better off working.